Earlier quoted context omitted.
People in this world do just grab peoples asses, kiss them, etc. all the time without explicit consent. Even without doing body shots.
Exactly. If someone goes as far as a body shot , I consider something like kissing very minor detail. Maybe its a cultural thing. I see this in movies all the time. Now you guys are telling me its sexual assault.
Because it needs to be said
521–530 of 635 posts
Re: Because it needs to be said
#522A tragic event but I really don't understand how making a public blog post is supposed to make anything better.
Please read the last paragraph. She didn't want to make this post, but an outcry for details from the community forced her hand.
Oh my. This is assault. She was forced to do something she didn't want to. The exact definition of assault. Which community is this? Are you part of this community? Why are we not exposing this community. Steve, please help us expose this vile and malicious community which forces people. Today it's blogs. Tomorrow who know what it is.
Re: Because it needs to be said
#523Reading the comments here makes me think I am in bizarro world. Is expecting women to say "No!" already too much personal responsibility for them these days? Calling this "sexual assault" is just crazy. There was no force, she never told him to stop. This would be thrown out in court without question in any half-way sane country.
Consent is not defined by the absence of a no, but a presence of a yes. The situation described falls within the definition of sexual assault in the United States, at least. I am not a lawyer. Decide for yourself: http://codes.ohio.gov/orc/2907.03
Re: Because it needs to be said
#524Earlier quoted context omitted.
You're trying to blame the victim, which is troublingly common when someone has been raped or sexually harassed but it is never the right response. It is traumatising when these things happen, it is personally demeaning and it is never acceptable. Justine is brave for coming forward and we should encourage everyone in a similar situation to do the same and support them when they do. The deeper cultural problem here i…
If the victim actually, definitely and factually is partly to be blamed, why cannot the victim be blamed? Or do you disallow facts to be said? (This comment is general and doesn't make claims about this particular case).
Re: Because it needs to be said
#525Re: Because it needs to be said
#526Earlier quoted context omitted.
> And why didn't she punch the aggressor? She was in shock. > Saying "no" isn't enough to claim she resisted. Why does it matter if she resisted? Is it not rape if you don't resist?
> Is it not rape if you don't resist? It's not rape if the other person has no way of telling that you want them to stop.
Re: Because it needs to be said
#527Earlier quoted context omitted.
This would condone drugging your victim and is obviously and dangerously wrong.
Yes, obviously that is an important exception, which doesn't change the fact that the statement is generally correct.
Re: Because it needs to be said
#528Earlier quoted context omitted.
I refuse to accept that as a norm. And you already proved the exception by suggesting you can just drink soda and no-one thinks any less of you.
Often, people will think less of you. I have a 'straightedge' tattoo on my back, and even though I'd go to bars, never mention it, and just drink Coke, others felt that by not drinking I was judging them. I lost friends over it. I drink now. Possibly too much.
Re: Because it needs to be said
#529I feel bad for Joe. What he did was not malicious. He is not an abuser or predator. He did a dumb thing. This story isn't about a rapist or someone who preys on women. It's about a drunk man who thought he was going to score. A man who was becoming increasingly physical with a woman who he was attracted to, and who invited him to do a body shot after he had grabbed her ass. For those who don't know what body shots ar…
This is so fucked on so many levels. Reading the comments here, have brought up one of the major issues I've always had with the technical community -- its inability to empathize. And worse, when it comes to sexual harassment and assault, it's almost as if there's a disincentive to empathize with the victim, resulting in straight-up, outlandish comments that are on par with those of extreme, right-wing talk radio hos…
Have heart :-)
Re: Because it needs to be said
#530Earlier quoted context omitted.
So you regularly see body shots in a non-sexual content? When could she expect it, then? What would have made the difference between this body shot and a "normal" body shot? I am not saying it was an invitation. It might not be but she cannot possibly do a body shot without expecting a fully grown alpha male to take his chances. Even if she didn't, she could have easily denied him the opportunity when things started…
You wrote: > she could have easily denied him the opportunity when things started getting too close. That's garbage. She said she froze up "like a deer in the headlights". She sounded terrified, so no - it wasn't easy at all.