Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

news.ycombinator.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

631–640 of 890 posts

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#631

Post by hamburglar »

mathgeek wrote: post #541
mikebelanger wrote: post #502

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There should be a shorthand phrase for "I agree with all parent nodes of this". Like a pseudo OOP-type syntax. Buying a bike and riding it regularly was my single best investment in terms of physical and mental health. A close second would be resistance training equipment, but this depends on what kind of resistance training you decide to do. I'd also say that part of the OP's issues stem from an expectation that one…

> There should be a shorthand phrase for "I agree with all parent nodes of this". Like a pseudo OOP-type syntax. +1 to everything above

super() // :)

I disagree that this is bad form, but it’s a little shallow unless you’re contributing something along with your “I agree.” I also strongly disagree that downvotes should be used for disagreement. Downvotes are for discouraging low-value posts, not making things you disagree with disappear from the discussion.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#632

Post by kuhzaam »

alea_iacta_est wrote: post #491

At 35, it's not an uncommon feeling, some call it a mid-life crisis. The reason imo is it's an age when we start feeling our body is getting old, the feeling of "immortality" of our 20s is gone, we realize the clock is ticking. Add to that what happens those last 2 years, the isolation, especially if you're single, and so of course it's a hard period for you. Personally, the way I dealt with it, was through reading e…

Any particular books you’d recommend to someone uninitiated to buddhism/stoicism?

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#633

Post by evilduck »

enraged_camel wrote: post #573
bredren wrote: post #534

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> His best physical years are behind him. They could be. Or it could depend on OP. Tom Brady has more Super Bowl Trophies and MVP selections from __after__ he was 37. There are plenty of athletic sports where being young does not offer easy superiority.

People like Tom Brady are extremely rare exceptions though, at the far, far end of the spectrum. In most competitive sports, player hit their peak relatively young, in most cases before they turn 35. This doesn't mean getting older necessarily makes one worse, but it definitely increases things like recovery times, chance of injury, etc. that tend to have that combined effect.

I mean, Brady's an exception of course but quarterbacks and kickers can trend significantly older than most other positions in football because they're highly protected by both the rules and their teams and play designs because they're essential scoring roles and their value is largely accuracy, not physically beating an opponent one on one. The same is not true for most of the other players on the field.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#634

Post by noelsusman »

datavirtue wrote: post #405
k8sToGo wrote: post #199

Earlier quoted context omitted.

While I am glad that you are enjoying kids, I do not think it is fair the way you paint the picture of people who choose to not have kids ("feeling sorry for them") as if it was a condition or something. Plus I think having children is not something that should be rushed. Pretty sure there are many parents out there who became a parent because of social pressure. What if I tell you I find fullfilment in travelling? S…

If you don't have kids you are missing a fundamental understanding of what is driving most people each and every day. You are clueless about most of the world because most people have kids and it profoundly affects them. You can't know this unless you experience it yourself. It's also difficult to understand what you are getting into by having kids. It brings on a profound level of anxiety about their feelings and ul…

It's actually not that difficult for childless people to imagine what having kids is like. What I imagined before I had kids was pretty close to what it ended up being once I had them.

I also don't think I've ever experienced my fellow parents feeling sorry for somebody our age without kids. It's more often jealousy than anything else. A lot of people have kids because it's just the next thing you do and then they end up regretting it.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#635

Post by notapenny »

You have time. You're 35. Realistically that means you've probably worked about 10 years and still have about 30 to go. Relax. You've got some money saved; I was in a similar situation a few years ago and took a sabbatical year. Maybe that works for you. Just do nothing for a bit but enjoy the outside world, disconnect, read philosophy. That really gave me a lot of peace and led to a career change and a lot of understanding about what I find important in life.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#636

Post by amznbyebyebye »

tharne wrote: post #370
amznbyebyebye wrote: post #201

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Unpopular opinion but even if you are a Bill Gates, I don’t think there is anything of substance about his technological innovation. What is noteworthy is how he has used his wealth in his philanthropic efforts to eradicate disease and suffering. That deserves kudos.

> Unpopular opinion but even if you are a Bill Gates, I don’t think there is anything of substance about his technological innovation. I don't understand the downvotes here. In 100 years or so, practically no one is going to remember that Bill Gates created a shitty operating system back in the 20th century, but there will probably be statues of him around the world for his philanthropic work.

When you comment anything that goes against the hacker fantasy… that all of a sudden the world discovers a genius amongst his github code and throws money and awards at him out of good will to honor his genius as if he was the next donald knuth or something then prepare to get downvoted.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#638

Post by z5h »

You need to read some philosophy. Find new and rewarding ways to reframe your life journey. The Stoics are the experts of moving past troubles and and reframing events in n a practical and/or positive way. Alan Watts was all about viewing everything as a joyful and entertaining whole. “Four Thousand Weeks” is a recent and practical book that aims to get over the idea of achievements and efficiency and get to enjoying moments in life and rediscovering what is meaningful to us.

Just a few getting started ideas here.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#639

Post by istjohn »

hughrr wrote: post #132

I’m in my late 40s. Just gone through 15 years of absolute shit with an ex partner and financial chaos. Decided I’d fix it in 2019. Three important things to concentrate on: 1. Health. If that’s off, fix it first. Everything depends on health. Sort out your diet, physical fitness and health and mental health follows. I’m fitter than all my peers and both fitter and healthier than I was in my 20s. Can run a half marat…

I would just add, do something altruistic and social. We're social creatures and we need to belong. Be a contributing member of a community.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#640

Post by drran »

dahart wrote: post #623
drran wrote: post #578

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When I was in school, our trainer was ill, so he was replaced by a craft teacher, which was fresh from the army. He was a soviet paratrooper, so he told us that he knows nothing about training, but he sure that we will fall a lot during our life, so he will train us to fall properly. We did about a hundred of jumps and falls and rolls per lesson, up to 2 meter height, in military style for 2,5 months, up to 1000 fall…

FWIW, I had a whole skydiving career before I started biking seriously. Drop & roll is not really a viable head injury prevention plan. You’re prepped for a few kinds of accidents with a backpack and trying to roll if/when there’s time, if you’re really lucky, but you’re leaving a mile wide blind spot to many possible accidents that you don’t have control over. Good luck, I hope you don’t have any of those kind of co…

Biking to work is not a skydiving.

See https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=35MHUtvIpP8

Post reply on HN