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Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

blog.interviewing.io

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Re: Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

#251

Post by Cthulhu_ »

klipt wrote: post #152
DoreenMichele wrote: post #145

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One day recently, my oldest commented on his observations that when he picks up food at the deli for us, he and other men say things like "Give me half a pound of potatoes." Women typically say things like "Can I have..." They sound like they are asking permission to eat even though they are a paying customer. My experience is that other people are weirded out when I talk in an empowered fashion like a man. Some peop…

I'm a dude and usually say "Can I please have..." but I'm from a Commonwealth country and I think there's a tendency for British/Commonwealth people to be less brash than Americans.

Can confirm. I'm Dutch, my GF is British. In Dutch, "Can I have x" is considered polite, but as it turns out it's quite rude in English, it needs a "please" somewhere.

Re: Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

#252

Post by Cthulhu_ »

_Wintermute wrote: post #195
AlwaysRock wrote: post #176

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not necessarily... "What will ya have?" "Yeah give me a half pound of the turkey that's on special." Perfectly appropriate conversation. It's a transactional conversation. Pleasantry are nice but the absence of them doesn't mean one is being rude.

Subtle cultural differences, but that would still sound rude to me.

Well the question was asked quite bluntly (I'm not going to call it rude, more err, direct, colloquial?)

Re: Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

#253

Post by Cthulhu_ »

PunchTornado wrote: post #177
x220 wrote: post #170

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Maybe in a couple years we can talk about statistics suggesting inherent gender differences in academic interest without getting screamed at.

it's almost impossible to prove that something is inherent to a gender vs culturally embedded (education, norms, myths etc.)

It is possible though, there has been scientific research in the matter. One interesting one is that gender differences in academic interest actually increase when people are given equal opportunities, pay, freedom of choice, etc.

Re: Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

#254

Post by mdpopescu »

corodra wrote: post #206
dabockster wrote: post #203

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I don't think hobbies are an acceptable thing anymore. That's just corporate America spewing their usual trash talk. Most people you'd meet on the street are totally fine with people having non-productive hobbies. Just as long as you're still able to make a 9-5 job, though. EDIT: What I'm trying to say is that people care that you have a day job. After that, any decent human being wouldn't care what you do with you…

Oh, no no no. I totally agree with you. My point was it's demonized and there's like a stigma to it. Like masturbating. I just always feel like whenever I talk to random new people about wood working, it's almost like I'm talking about masturbating to them with they way they act about it. Since it's not money producing. It's not like I give a shit. I had a supremely bad burn out years ago and different hobbies have k…

This puritanism is becoming ridiculous. This was flagged because it talked of masturbation? Seriously?

Re: Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

#255

Post by Cthulhu_ »

joeax wrote: post #98
jarjoura wrote: post #44

Of course it does, it's not a gender problem, who said it was? How many of you have heard your friends and colleagues tell you, "wow I'm so lucky I got through that interview, there's no way I would pass it if I did it again today." You shouldn't walk away from a good interview feeling like you nailed it. An interviewer should push you to your limits and the more you know, the more they should push. It doesn't mean y…

Many of these people interviewing wouldn't pass their own interviews if the roles were reversed. The bar should be high, but not so high that you leave feeling demoralized.

I wonder if I would. I joined my current employer "through the back door" so to speak, that is, without the interview or the 5+ years of experience they asked (as an apprentice) and have been taking technical interviews ever since. But am I actually competent enough?

I mean I've been working there for nearly 8 years now and haven't gotten fired yet so it should be alright. But still. [/impostor syndrome]

Re: Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

#256

Post by ricardoreis »

Balgair wrote: post #87
jarjoura wrote: post #44

Of course it does, it's not a gender problem, who said it was? How many of you have heard your friends and colleagues tell you, "wow I'm so lucky I got through that interview, there's no way I would pass it if I did it again today." You shouldn't walk away from a good interview feeling like you nailed it. An interviewer should push you to your limits and the more you know, the more they should push. It doesn't mean y…

> An interviewer should push you to your limits and the more you know, the more they should push. Granted, this is HN, but this viewpoint is very tech-engineer focused. Most jobs aren't like this at all. Chicken-parts processor interviews aren't like this, para-legal interviews aren't like this, firefighter interviews aren't like this, teacher interviews aren't like this, etc. For the vast majority of jobs out there,…

Chicken-parts processor interviews aren't like this, para-legal interviews aren't like this, firefighter interviews aren't like this, teacher interviews aren't like this, etc.

Nor were tech interviews (usually), until about 10 years ago.

Re: Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

#257

Post by Cthulhu_ »

brandall10 wrote: post #99
commandlinefan wrote: post #65

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've always been interviewed by multiple people - I think 12 was the high, and 4 was the low. When I do end up getting the job, I always wonder... which of them said yes and which said no?

That's not that unusual. 15 minute recruiter screen -> 1 hour tech screen -> 5 hour onsite (5 parts w/ 2 devs each) can do it. I've probably exceeded 20 before if you count lunch and meeting VPs/directors toward the end.

I still don't get it tbh. Our interview process is 3-4 1 hour talks at most - introduction / initial interview (phone or face to face) with 1-2 people (manager / HR), technical interview / code review (2 people), then a final chat with the CEO and finally a contract offer / negotiation. People can have a signed contract within a day. And we are actually very demanding of our people.

Re: Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

#258

Post by ricardoreis »

zeroname wrote: post #140
Balgair wrote: post #87

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> An interviewer should push you to your limits and the more you know, the more they should push. Granted, this is HN, but this viewpoint is very tech-engineer focused. Most jobs aren't like this at all. Chicken-parts processor interviews aren't like this, para-legal interviews aren't like this, firefighter interviews aren't like this, teacher interviews aren't like this, etc. For the vast majority of jobs out there,…

> Hanlon's Razor states that the mostly likely explanation is not conspiracy, but stupidity. Most of the time, your interviewers are just dumb/inexperienced/busy/assholes. What are the odds that everyone in your interview is dumb/inexperienced/busy or an asshole versus the odds that it's just you ?

What are the odds that everyone in your interview is dumb/inexperienced/busy/asshole [and not you]?

The commenter wasn't saying that everyone they talked to was in that category. But rather that one person they talked to who basically tanked the whole interview for them. You know, the one who reported back everyone about what an uninspired dolt you are because you didn't answer that "Tell us about your dreams" question with quite the level of gushing enthusiasm they were expecting.

So what are the odds that you'll run into at least one person in that category, in a random tech interview these days?

When we take into account how toxic and culturally dysfunctional the tech industry in general has become in recent years -- I'm speaking specifically of it is huge vanity problem (from which this "we only hire the best" nonsense stems); combined with its insatiable addiction to bullshit and the cargo-culting of bad practices (and its worship of dumb and/or useless interview questions specifically) --

actually, fairly high.

Re: Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

#259

Post by [deleted] »

pmiller2 wrote: post #101
alxlaz wrote: post #91

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've made a point for myself to never ask questions like "what are your dreams" or "where do you see yourself in 10 years" in an interview, ever. For a long time, I've used these as a filter, too. Getting this kind of question in an interview is a big red flag for me and a huge disappointment. Let me elaborate a little. My dreams are none of an interviewer's bloody business. I'm here to work not share the things that…

I see these types of questions as the sign of an inexperienced interviewer. Given how many inexperienced interviewers one can see interviewing at tech companies, I would call that a chartreuse flag at best due to lack of signal.

[deleted]

Re: Impostor syndrome strikes men just as hard as women in technical interviews

#260

Post by mdpopescu »

kowdermeister wrote: post #42

I've gone through interviewing recently and it was a rather frustrating experience. I thought that the most challenging thing will be some tricky algo questions I don't use in real life or never heard of it. It turned out that the problem was to get to the tech interview at all by convincing the interviewer to believe that I actually have the experience that I claim. Didn't always work. It was mostly because they did…

If you're in an EU country and can move, I strongly recommend Ireland. They're starved for people, I've never had an experience like that at any of my interviews.
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