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Did porn warp me forever?

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Re: Did porn warp me forever?

#261

Post by rooker »

Mz wrote: post #74

Both his parents were psychologists.* Any psych major knows the old saw that you probably got bad stuff like this from your parents. Some of the psych majors I have personally known struck me as folks who had no clue how humans work and were hoping to get a clue by majoring in it. When I went to GIS school, this observation was reinforced by a classmate who had a Master's in Psychology and was looking to change caree…

Great point. As someone who has been studying psychology for a while now, you're completely right that people tend to diverge into one of two paths. On the one side you have people like Skinner who become completely robotic and excessively scientific, on the other side you have Jung who still maintained the mystery and excitement of life in his writings and musings.

I don't think you can attribute this specifically to psychology, it's sort of applicable to every science. You have someone like Neil Degrasse Tyson or Carl Sagan to every emotionless, numbers-only physicist who doesn't sleep with his wife.

It's a personal choice, whether to accept life as a mystery and study it as such or consider it a problem that needs to be solved analytically and without emotion.

That said, yes, when I worked in a psychiatry department I worked around the most miserly, insane people I've ever met. They were more cold and soulless than the homeless people we were treating. I got out of there right quick.

Re: Did porn warp me forever?

#262

Post by cheeseandbacon »

antihero wrote: post #54

There are people who watch a huge amount of porn but have a perfectly healthy sex life and relationship with women. It's about understanding what it is and it's context, and realising that there's a difference between that and reality.

This is much easier said than done. Schrödinger's addicts I like to call them.

Re: Did porn warp me forever?

#263

Post by exim »

neumann_alfred wrote: post #254
exim wrote: post #241

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Regarding differences in easy accessibility of "materials" for different orientation persons, one interesting thing worth mentioning - unlike heterosexuals, homosexuals carry this "material" all the time with them - their body...

Ever noticed how moving your own tongue about in your own mouth is totally not like french kissing someone else? Kinda counterintuitive I know, but those have been my findings.

Yes, but my comparison was about paper/picture/magazine materials vs real body.

Re: Did porn warp me forever?

#264

Post by Mz »

acuozzo wrote: post #252
Mz wrote: post #178

Earlier quoted context omitted.

He talks about how taboo porn was at home and that it was exciting chiefly because it was forbidden. I would guess his parents didn't have a great marriage and didn't model a healthy intimate relationship for him. Sounds like sex was a big unspoken issue in the household. Also, what the hell was a kid in elementary school doing burning XXX CD's to share with some clique in-crowd? They obviously were an elite group, w…

> It sounds like he grew up in a two career family where no one was paying much attention to anything he did. What if his parents stopped paying attention because he wanted absolutely nothing to do with them and made it known? That's how I started treating my parents (one career household: pop worked; mom did everything else) at twelve years old and it wore them down after four years. I still feel quite guilty about…

Well, I would personally still view that as a failure on the parents part. My youngest is extremely introverted. He would put an axe through my face if I doted on him like I doted on his older brother. I learned to respect his need for space at a very early age, when he was a toddler. He shares with me when he damn well feels like it. But we still have a good relationship, because I realized he was different from me and from his brother. Giving him his space was unnatural for me. Doting was easier. But he still loves me because I didn't dote. I backed off.

But I seem to have crazy good parenting instincts. So my high expectations are probably a tad unreasonable in some sense.

Re: Did porn warp me forever?

#265

Post by guard-of-terra »

npsimons wrote: post #259
guard-of-terra wrote: post #223

Earlier quoted context omitted.

How is it relevant to the article being discussed?

Dworkin was a big critic of pornography, claiming it caused rape and subjugation of women. While there are undoubtedly some women in porn against their will (or verging on doing it for lack of better options (ie, "for the money")), this point of view completely ignores women who are aware of their options, but choose to do porn and see it as an issue of "their body, their choice".

There is enough porn produced already so if the production ends today there's enough already for most of people.

Concerning distribution: is there anybody stupid enough to ask for an never-ending, positional "war on porn"? As if wars on drugs and on pirates wasn't enough

Re: Did porn warp me forever?

#266

Post by jjhicks »

true_religion wrote: post #191
_ddkb wrote: post #118

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I didn't mean to say dopamine is a drug. Yes dopamine is normal and it increases from many things. The problem is constantly altering it through activities that would not be occuring in nature. The videos I linked to on yourbrainonporn.com really explained it well for me. Maybe you could watch them and let me know what you disagree with. I maybe getting some things mixed up as I don't have a great understanding of th…

I've heard this theory before, but I feel as if were it true we would already have a long series of old wives tales of how the 'studs' are always morose, and its better for newly weds to abstain on occasion rather than follow their flush desires. The orgasms gotten through pornography aren't any stronger than those found 'in nature'---this isn't heroine.

QUOTE -The orgasms gotten through pornography aren't any stronger than those found 'in nature'---this isn't heroine.

You have missed the entire point.

Orgasm lasts a few seconds.

Porn addiction is not about orgasms its about porn. The viewing, searching, clicking from tab to tab on tube sites. Starting in early adolescence, training ones brain to need a certain level of stimulation. For some - hours a day.

Dopamine responds to novelty and anticipation, and is elevated to near orgasmic levels during sexual excitement.

Read the start here article on that site, and you will see that all addictions involve the same fundamental brain changes which are caused by a specific set of genes, all activated by the accumulation one molecule deltafosb. This is indisputable.

You will also see about 300 links to citations on that one page.

Re: Did porn warp me forever?

#267

Post by papsosouid »

rdtsc wrote: post #164
VigUi7vv8G2 wrote: post #142

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I would appreciate it if people stopped making up or repeating ridiculous pseudo-scientific explanations for whatever it is they want to believe.

> I would appreciate it Oh, you would? How dare everyone on the internet not cater to your expectations. Someone from the community shared a story of personal struggle. They didn't hide behind a pseudonym, and it was probably a hard decision for them. They also, did in hopes it would help someone else. They might not have used precise definitions or scientifically correct terms but they were honest and civil and even…

I find it interesting that you characterize his personal opinion as expecting "everyone on the internet to cater to his expectations", while demanding that he cater to your expectations of "politeness". People posting deliberately misleading pseudo-scientific nonsense do not warrant some false amiability. His nonsense needs a firm rebuttal, just as homeopathy and chakras and crystal therapy and all the other quackery does.

Re: Did porn warp me forever?

#268

Post by papsosouid »

gopi wrote: post #256

This comment may be down voted here. But i think there is a case to be made for a new law that mandates the ISP's to password protect all porn websites by default.

Yep, because if someone claims something might be bad for them, we should restrict access for everyone! By the way, hacker news makes me slack off at work, so I'm looking forward to the law that forces ISPs to block it by default.

Re: Did porn warp me forever?

#269

Post by papsosouid »

jacoblyles wrote: post #41

There's a part of the paleo subculture that avoids porn as an unnatural superstimulus. See http://yourbrainonporn.com/ or http://www.reddit.com/r/nofap Anecdotally, I find their arguments compelling.

Just as compelling as the rest of paleo: not at all. It ranges from logical fallacies at best, to outright deliberate lies at worst.

Re: Did porn warp me forever?

#270

Post by chubbard »

exim wrote: post #241
tommorris wrote: post #237

Well, if we're all just going to trade anecdotes at each other, I may as well do so too. Unlike the author of the original piece, I'm happy to use my real name. I looked at porn on the Internet as a teenager. I'm gay and back then I was deep in the closet. And I grew up when Section 28 was still in force. It was a law passed in the 80s that said schools "shall not intentionally promote homosexuality or publish materi…

Regarding differences in easy accessibility of "materials" for different orientation persons, one interesting thing worth mentioning - unlike heterosexuals, homosexuals carry this "material" all the time with them - their body...

"intimacy - a close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship with another person or group." Therefore, you can't experience intimacy by yourself. It requires at least another person.
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