271–280 of 728 posts
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That would exclude me and others who refuse on principle to use Facebook (or really any social media owned by Meta).
Right. Excluding, let’s be honest, a couple of weirdos who don’t use FB as ideological stance is a problem. Excluding huge swaths of “normies”(who are majority of people) by setting up third party website with zero reputation is not.
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They need to be male only spaces because introducing women to the space fundamentally changes the social dynamic among the men, especially the single men I have seen this ever since the moment me and my friends hit puberty in high school, to this very day. When a group of men is hanging out they are more relaxed. The moment a woman is in the space the vibe changes I cannot be the only person who has noticed this
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That depends on what "normal" is, and I don't think you or I get to define it.
I mostly hang out in mixed-gender groups, but I absolutely have seen the difference in vibe others in this thread have noted, when I'm hanging out with a group of just other men. Especially when compared to a mixed group that has both single men and single women.
> men are putting these strange rules and requirements on their own selves
I wouldn't call it a "rule" so much as a "phenomenon". It just seems to kinda happen. Not always, and not in every mixed-gender group, but it does happen. I don't think anyone is making up or following any kind of "rules", and I can't control group dynamics or behavior on my own.
> I don't think that's a society issue. I think that's a you issue.
I think this discussion would be more productive without thinly-veiled ad hominem attacks.
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Example?
Talking about your feelings without fear of a woman getting the ick.
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Nobody said anything like this. I love hanging out in mixed groups. However, and this may shock you, I also love hanging out in non mixed groups. And they are not the same.
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No, because homosexual men tend not to compete with men for women’s attention.
Precisely. So a group of men , some or all of whom are gay, will react differently to the arrival of a woman than one in which all are straight.
And on top of that, I've heard some gay men complain about straight women in their spaces. That's just another example of this phenomenon.
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No, you need regular events, same place twice a month. That's the killer for social clubs like this. Just have a regular date in the diary and if people are free they can drop in. Then do the more unique events on a different day (and let members suggest/ organise events too). Friendship is repetition with the same group. Make it easy on people by meeting at the same time, maybe changing venue within a small area. A…
Its funny because you described liberal Freemasonry: mandatory attendance twice a month. Forcing yourself to go and feeling the honor of being part of a group has been great for me. I'm sure other groups have that kind of rule too, but the mandatory part is what makes it special.
The lack of deep friendships feel like a 3-fold problem. 1. You can't ever be real, if you are real, you are likely to be recorded doing something someone somewhere on the largest stage in the world (the public web) that someone will disapprove of, and someone else will raise their own profile by mining your impiety to prove their own concern and moral superiority. 2. Everyone is so mobile and connected online, they…
> Everyone is so mobile and connected online, they never have to break the ice and talk to those around them one of the unexpected consequences of social media is that people have been conflating being informed with being connected . asking "what have you been up to?" was to be a nice easy opening into a conversation that lead to connection. but thanks to broadcast updates on social media, your friends already know w…
I don't think this is really a big deal. "hey I saw you posted pictures from your trip. How was it" there, conversation started. Social media posts are basically all conversation starters.
Assuming you can even remember. I pretty quickly forget people's posts and updates.
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