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Teaching Good Sex

nytimes.com

61–70 of 110 posts

Re: Teaching Good Sex

#61

I recently (well, a few years ago) went through sex education in schools. They don't really teach you sex, as much as why you shouldn't have sex. Even when they're teaching contraception, the consistent emphasis on only x% effective really cuts out student interest. It's almost like saying, "yeah we have a method or preventing HIV transmission, but it doesn't really work." While it might seem like a good idea at firs…

> I think it's about time we standardized it.

Great, more teaching to the test....

Re: Teaching Good Sex

#62
post #57
post #39

Earlier quoted context omitted.

While the article starts out mentioning the students who have lots of sex, later on it explains that those were not actually the majority, and there even were some virgins in the course. And even the ones having lots of sex were also troubled by it. Reading stuff about colleges in the US, sometimes it seems as if all those kids do is fornicate. I suspect the reality looks quite different. Just saying that part of the…

> there even were some virgins in the course An early part of the article said there was one. In my mind, neither the author nor the instructor he wrote about seemed approving of the choice, and went to lengths to cast it as non-normative. A decision for abstinence before marriage should be encouraged, not demanded, and not based on scare tactics. There are more people making that choice than the article suggests.

If 70% of all American teenagers have had sex by the time they are 19, I'm not at all surprised virginity is not the norm in a open no-holds-barred class on sexuality. The class targets is audience, as it should.

Re: Teaching Good Sex

#63
post #13

I recently (well, a few years ago) went through sex education in schools. They don't really teach you sex, as much as why you shouldn't have sex. Even when they're teaching contraception, the consistent emphasis on only x% effective really cuts out student interest. It's almost like saying, "yeah we have a method or preventing HIV transmission, but it doesn't really work." While it might seem like a good idea at firs…

Was she having sex with you? She might be disclosing it to her partners, just not every random guys she knows, understandably.

She actually did disclose it to the OP. So I don't see the problem. He just doesn't like the idea of people with Hep B having sex, I suspect. But as per the facts we have, it sounds to me like she's doing the right thing.

Re: Teaching Good Sex

#64

I recently (well, a few years ago) went through sex education in schools. They don't really teach you sex, as much as why you shouldn't have sex. Even when they're teaching contraception, the consistent emphasis on only x% effective really cuts out student interest. It's almost like saying, "yeah we have a method or preventing HIV transmission, but it doesn't really work." While it might seem like a good idea at firs…

I recently (well, a few years ago) went through functional programming in schools. They don't really teach you functional programming, as much as why you shouldn't program imperatively. Even when they're teaching functional programming, the consistent emphasis on only x% effective really cuts out student interest. It's almost like saying, "yeah we have a method for preventing destructive assignment, but it doesn't really work." While it might seem like a good idea at first, I found it to quickly invoke the I'm not listening anymore response. Next, is the issue of effectiveness. Personally, I've been shown way so many gross images of imperative spaghetti code, that I won't even open vim without knowing I have scala. Unfortunately, this doesn't follow through for a lot of other kids who went through the same education as I did. "I love ruby", "what about python", "it doesn't feel as good as C++", and "it's just too much work" are all (yes I know it's sad) frequently cited responses among people I know.

Thirdly, and most troublesome of all, some people don't care that they're spreading nasty interoperability impedance mismatching in their non-scalaz libraries since they haven't realized that variance annotations are not worth their use in the context of Scala’s partial support for Hindley Milner type-inferencing.

. I recently found out someone I knew was receiving treatment for coding in C. I asked her when she found out, believing this to be a recent development. "I've been coding in C all my life," she responds. I walked out of the room. She's quite active in the C community, and her disdain for scalaz is legendary. How anyone can exhibit that kind of carelessness is honestly, beyond me.

Rather than force Scalaz, I feel we might have to take a completely different approach. Scala is great, but it doesn't work when kids don't want to listen or don't care. Perhaps we need to stress the why here, rather than the how.Why fmap, contramap and xmap are (far) superior alternatives to annotated variances and covariances on map, for example.[2]

Lastly - I know this is really aside the point of this article, but Scala should probably also teach how to properly code using pure functional constructs. Not using Higher Kinded types in favor of Pimped Types, encoding algebraic structures of category theory, understanding type theory, (truly understanding, for real ) the benefits of static program verification, attempting a high (read: extremely high) degree of abstraction in the context of Scala’s limited laziness abilities, etc.

It's kind of sad that we learn all these things by exploration, again and again, generation after generation. I think it's about time we standardized it. Everyone needs to (well, almost everyone) use KleisliMA and FingerTrees one day, anyway. Lets just go one step further and relocate L3 programmers who don't understand (read:truly understand) applicative predictor monads, writer transformers lifted into a pointed functors and the Yoneda Lemma to a desert island in the Carribean and carpet bomb said island with B-32s until the last imperative mofo is subsumed by the dust. A Martin L3 is also known as Beginner Haskell Programmer. Might as well aim higher than Martin.

( Apologies etc. Dedicated to Tony Morris, my personal Haskell hero and Scala superhero 1. http://blog.tmorris.net/critique-of-oderskys-scala-levels/

2. http://scalaz.github.com/scalaz/scalaz-2.9.1-6.0.2/doc.sxr/s...)

3. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yoneda_lemma

Re: Teaching Good Sex

#65
post #63
post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Was she having sex with you? She might be disclosing it to her partners, just not every random guys she knows, understandably.

She actually did disclose it to the OP. So I don't see the problem. He just doesn't like the idea of people with Hep B having sex, I suspect. But as per the facts we have, it sounds to me like she's doing the right thing.

The reason I asked is because I've had knowingly had unprotected sex with a Heb B positive person. I had had a successful vaccination (meaning the antibodies were detectable in my blood) and consequently never got infected from him.

He disclosed this to me before we had sex. I told him "no big deal" because I had the antibodies. So just because the girl is having unprotected sex and hep B positive doesn't mean she's irresponsible, as long as her partners have had a successful vaccination.

(It is important to verify that your vaccination "took" however, before having sex with a hep B pos person.)

Re: Teaching Good Sex

#66

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes. I was struck by the definition given to the school by the Urban Dictionary: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=FCS&defid... BTW is that the past tense of the verb "know" as in "we _did_ know how to do math until we f *ed our brains out!" Sorry, I'm just jealous because I have never met a girl who went to Friends Central School. Had I done so possibly she could have demonstrated the marvels of "female…

You and the poster you're replying to both seem to need to put female ejaculation in quotes, presumably to imply that it's some nonsense that either doesn't exist, or doesn't merit discussing. The fact that so many people reach adulthood without knowledge of even the existence of this basic biological function indicates to me the need for more education of this type. But you seem happy with your slut-shaming, so, car…

Like most people, I've always been fascinated by human sexuality. But unless you're over 50 years of age, I've read of and studied reports of "female ejaculation" since before you were born. There's never been any solid scientific basis for believing "female ejaculation" is anything other than involuntary urination.

Re: Teaching Good Sex

#67

Earlier quoted context omitted.

towards those getting laid.. I know it's stupid, but I think in the past part of it arose from just knowing that they were doing it, and I as a geek was not going to get it. I strongly thought in the past that because I was nerdy, I was automatically despised by girls. I know that's not completely true now, but there is a little bit of truth to it. But to reiterate, I think what gave me this feeling, was thinking tha…

I don't know how old you are, but be prepared to battle this for much of your life. At 32, I would have hoped to excise the latent misogyny and distrust of former jocks that my adolescent experiences burned into me, but it has not abated. I expect this to last a lifetime, and my only defense is to continue working on discarding cached thoughts( per the LessWrong folks )whenever they are recognized. The real kicker is…

The day you realize a woman is sleeping with you merely as a chore to gain access to resources - well, let's just say that's not a very good day.

It only makes sense that women are genetically programmed to seek males who can be good providers for their children. You are to be complimented for your success. You must take measures (i.e., condoms, etc.) to ensure you are not entrapped however.

If you desire offspring, you should seek a woman who will not pursue sex outside your relationship. A woman who falls in love with you is, of course, most suitable. But make no mistake, your success will enhance your attractiveness to any women seeking a mate, even one who falls in love with you.

Re: Teaching Good Sex

#68

Earlier quoted context omitted.

towards those getting laid.. I know it's stupid, but I think in the past part of it arose from just knowing that they were doing it, and I as a geek was not going to get it. I strongly thought in the past that because I was nerdy, I was automatically despised by girls. I know that's not completely true now, but there is a little bit of truth to it. But to reiterate, I think what gave me this feeling, was thinking tha…

I don't know how old you are, but be prepared to battle this for much of your life. At 32, I would have hoped to excise the latent misogyny and distrust of former jocks that my adolescent experiences burned into me, but it has not abated. I expect this to last a lifetime, and my only defense is to continue working on discarding cached thoughts( per the LessWrong folks )whenever they are recognized. The real kicker is…

Cool to see a fellow LessWrong fan here.

Have a look at http://www.reddit.com/r/seduction

Probably gonna get down-voted for peddling PUA filth but whatevs :)

Re: Teaching Good Sex

#69
post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

towards those getting laid.. I know it's stupid, but I think in the past part of it arose from just knowing that they were doing it, and I as a geek was not going to get it. I strongly thought in the past that because I was nerdy, I was automatically despised by girls. I know that's not completely true now, but there is a little bit of truth to it. But to reiterate, I think what gave me this feeling, was thinking tha…

I remember that feeling well. Took years to shake even after the first time. Without writing a novel on the subject, it helps to take a perspective lifted from evolutionary biology, and embrace your inner beast. It's possible to be too much of a nice guy.

It's good to be nice if you genuinely want to be nice.

If you are doing it because you are living out a "covert contract", then people can smell that and it's not attractive.

Have a look-see at this: http://evolutionmale.wordpress.com/2011/03/06/nice-guys-aren...

(Not pointed at lukifer in particular, I'm sure he knows this already).

Re: Teaching Good Sex

#70
post #26

It seems unwise to promote casual sex without fully understanding the consequences. And I don't speak of the overblown disease fears, but the far more serious effects of emotional desensitization. Sex elicits a chemical response much like cocaine or heroin, and is also prone to the build up of tolerance. Thus, casual sex with multiple partners leads to a severely diminished capacity for pair bonding and emotional ful…

The saddest thing is that you seem to be serious about this, even trying to make it 'legit' or somewhat sensible by invoking Occam's Razor. No facts (a link to general antidepressant consumption and a random blog w/ exactly three posts). Everyone move along, someone just posted a (traditional, right-winged/conservative) private opinion on life and family values with a healthy dose of conspiracy FUD (marriage .. shamb…

An ad hominem attack with a dash of appeal to authority...enlightening. If you require proof of sexuality's impact on human behavior, I recommend reviewing the extant literature. Here are some examples:

1. http://www.amazon.com/Red-Queen-Evolution-Human-Nature/dp/00...

2. http://www.amazon.com/Moral-Animal-Science-Evolutionary-Psyc...

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