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Sex is going out of fashion?

welltechnically.news

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Re: Sex is going out of fashion?

#261

Another factor: Casual sex has a high chance of resulting in legal entanglements, sooner or later. "Consent" can be withdrawn whenever convenient; making a quick fling into sexual assault.

You are saying that rape was a large portion of sex, and is going out of fashion? That would be both distressing (for the past), and encouraging for the future.

Re: Sex is going out of fashion?

#262

There are so many incel type comments in this thread and anytime this subject comes up. Online dating definitely isn’t fun but it’s not the shit show people here seem to make out. All of my friends met their long terms partners on dating apps. None of these men are particularly attractive. All are average looking at best. Personally I went from never dating to going on dates with a handful of people over a 6 month pe…

I'm going to be real with you, this sounds similar to the "the job market isn't that bad, yes it's bad but I got a job right out of college" spiel bypassing evidence that many people send hundreds of job applications before they ever get a job. Studies show most people meet online. Studies show most people struggle in dating markets. These are not mutually exclusive. But unlike jobs, one doesn't need to date to live,…

I can see your comparison but I disagree. In a normal job market most people can come out of a college a get a job. It just might not be the flashy job they think they deserve. Maybe they have to wash dishes or stick shelves when they’re trained for something else. Dating is similar. You can get a date if you’re willing to compromise on looks. Some people just won’t even entertain that idea or won’t entertain the idea that they might have to aim even lower than they expected.

Re: Sex is going out of fashion?

#263
post #36

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Because now you get a lifetime label as a registered sex offender if you get caught. Additionally, those of us who grew up in the 80's had the absolute fear of AIDS drilled into us. IMO, the AIDS epidemic blunted the libido of at least one generation.

Almost nobody got laid in the 80's. Fact.

People who grew up in the 80s were by definition not getting laid until the 90s for the most part.

As one of those people, well, it didn't stop me. But the terror was real.

Re: Sex is going out of fashion?

#264
*In the west.

I think gender equality may be a big culprit. Take the US for example: women will dominate the college educated class soon if they haven't already, and with that economic freedom comes more optionality in choosing a partner, there are more choices to be had and there will be a self selection of the most desirable men (typically college educated as it correlates to income).

This is not to blame women in any sense, it's a great thing that we're achieving a more equal society, but with a industrial well educated society more optionality with partners will lead to less sex imo.

Re: Sex is going out of fashion?

#265

I'd have sex everyday if women wanted me :D

Men say that until they met a woman who wants sex everyday.

They just say that until they realize that when you don't have sex for a week, you want it every day, but after you have sex, the need fades for a while. And of course sex drive decreases with age, from an extremely horny peak around ~20.

Re: Sex is going out of fashion?

#266

I'd have sex everyday if women wanted me :D

good sex is like two hour affair with new people with related warm up and and cool down phase. Even if act is only 15 minutes. 14 hours a week a lot of time

It comes out of TV/Reddit/videogame time, and it improves sleep, so it pays for itself easily.

Re: Sex is going out of fashion?

#267

95% of Tinder swipes by women are passes compared to 47% for men. Women tend to date up. Online dating apps are rigged for men. These apps are search engines optimized to match women with the top 5% of men. These apps are designed for women. Being average or even above average will almost never result in a date. Tinder was designed like a slot machine which will ruin your self-esteem from constant rejection but your…

Reading stuff like this makes me really glad that I married my first girlfriend. We've been married for over 10 years now. She was really out of my league. I did compromise on many things including age gap (she is older), past baggage and the fact that I have to let her win every argument and do everything she says but I'm glad because she was the opportunity of my life and I took it and I've never been so lucky sinc…

Sounds miserable tbqh.

Re: Sex is going out of fashion?

#268

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I am also less physically attractive if I’m 25# heavier than I should be. This goes to an even greater extent once that surplus tips towards 50#.

Aside: Woah, using the # (pound) symbol for lbs., why did I never think of that before? Thanks for blowing my mind a bit there sokoloff

As a non-american this would have been really confusing without your explanation.

Re: Sex is going out of fashion?

#269
post #27

The comments in this thread and this article is making me want to read HN less. (What a crazy incorrect take for most of the population.)

I don't know why but there seems to be some outsized group of people that thrives on reducing social interactions to numbers. I remember seeing a lot of this in self-destructive subreddits (eg MGTOW). Maybe it's so they can write off self-improvement (you can't argue with math!)?

Isn't MGTOW a self-improvement sub?

Re: Sex is going out of fashion?

#270

95% of Tinder swipes by women are passes compared to 47% for men. Women tend to date up. Online dating apps are rigged for men. These apps are search engines optimized to match women with the top 5% of men. These apps are designed for women. Being average or even above average will almost never result in a date. Tinder was designed like a slot machine which will ruin your self-esteem from constant rejection but your…

Get of these apps. I think many men who use apps, do so because they are too afraid to approach a woman they find attractive if the situation is appropriate. They don't bite, if you make a move with enough respect and confidence. In my opinion while convenient, they should be last resort.

> Get of these apps. I think many men who use apps, do so because they are too afraid to approach a woman they find attractive if the situation is appropriate.

Yes. I couldn't agree more. Spent 2-3 frustrating years on Tinder without much success. At the start of the pandemic, I was done with being alone in my apartment and decided to try to approach women on the street. My takeaways:

1. Heart rate goes over 130 (according to the Garmin smartwatch)

2. It's **much** more fun to be rejected. Instead of being ignored, you get cool stories like me asking "Hey, you look nice. Would you like to chat?" and getting as response "Uhm... No, I'll continue walking".

3. Get inspiration/courage from watching lots and lots of YouTube videos from people who do nice approaches. I personally liked ThatWasEpic a lot. See for example https://youtu.be/cj9tvIFcUeU.

4. It's much more effective in my case. I'm with my girlfriend for 2 years now and she was the 6th person that I approached... I'm not kidding. After years of Tinder.

So, delete dating apps and go out and talk to people.

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