you are very lucky to be in your 30's, there are so many things you can do after work. Join a gym, volunteer, online dating is fun in my 30's I had dates almost every week got to meet a bunch of beautiful girls, also got into running and joined a running club, volunteer. also going to a bar is fun you can go to a bar and just meet a few locals in your neighborhood. Also it depends on where you live. maybe if you are working as a developer you can get a job that is fully remote and travel and work from some fun place like Thailand or Spain .
Ask HN: At a peak of my dev career, I hate my life
491–500 of 522 posts
Re: Ask HN: At a peak of my dev career, I hate my life
#492Earlier quoted context omitted.
Touting therapy as incredible effective is at least a little dishonest. I know very many people who saw no benefit from it despite great expense. Think: If you see benefit from therapy are you not more likely to keep going?
Honestly, a lot of people who see therapists do keep going. A friend put it to me this way: you're paying money for perspective and objectivity, and this is especially true for people in relationships. It also takes time and effort to find a therapist who is a good fit for you. If the therapist is not a good fit for you, then there will be little benefit. Therapy has helped me anyway.
I know, I'm pointing out that trains of thought similar to "I was unsure of therapy but liked it and kept going" are not going to be universal because maybe there is some underlying thing that makes you more likely to be helped by therapy.
Uncharitably I've seen this framed as something like "therapists only help people with simple problems."
Re: Ask HN: At a peak of my dev career, I hate my life
#493Move to a warm culture country. You will make friends and have a great social life.
Re: Ask HN: At a peak of my dev career, I hate my life
#494If you can work remote, go on a road trip and book airbnb rooms in homes where there are many other rooms listed. You are guaranteed to run into other digital nomads who are open to meeting new people..
Re: Ask HN: At a peak of my dev career, I hate my life
#495Earlier quoted context omitted.
The real litmus test for high intelligence is if they were not anti-vaxxers and actively sought vaccinations.
Honest question - was this sarcasm?
It's not sarcastic at all but I suppose it's sort of tongue-in-cheek?
Antivaxxers are probably not highly intelligent.. But they will think they are because of Dunning-Kruger effect.
Re: Ask HN: At a peak of my dev career, I hate my life
#496Earlier quoted context omitted.
So we have an idea that is false. Demonstrably false we can agree. Also, anecdotes aside for a moment overwhelmingly higher religious beliefs correlate with lower intelligence. So, back to the anecdote, why in the case of someone being intelligent by your judgement would they believe this story, with ample evidence easily accessible to refute it? - They've never considered it critically--ok that's possible - They've…
To veer a little off track, I used to be a huge fan of Richard Dawkins back in college until I realized his approach just creates friction and polarization. The opposite of what he crusades for. The astrophysicists have a way better approach than the biologists. It's non-confrontational. But my point is that I don't think it's impossible for atheists and religious folks to be friends. Or even date and get married. Mu…
> To veer a little off track, I used to be a huge fan of Richard Dawkins back in college until I realized his approach just creates friction and polarization. The opposite of what he crusades for.
That's exactly what he crusades for; he’s not anti-friction or anti-polarization (on religion or any of his other pet issues), he's a zealous bigot.
> The astrophysicists have a way better approach than the biologists. It's non-confrontational.
There are plenty of non-confrontational biologists. Dawkins doesn't represent “biologists” he represents Dawkins.
Re: Ask HN: At a peak of my dev career, I hate my life
#497Earlier quoted context omitted.
So we have an idea that is false. Demonstrably false we can agree. Also, anecdotes aside for a moment overwhelmingly higher religious beliefs correlate with lower intelligence. So, back to the anecdote, why in the case of someone being intelligent by your judgement would they believe this story, with ample evidence easily accessible to refute it? - They've never considered it critically--ok that's possible - They've…
There are tons of things like this outside of religion. Almost every coherent group of people believes in some sort of nonsense for political reasons, and as a form of identity signaling. - Many people in this community believe that a female soul can be mis-allocated to a male body, for example. - Many people in this community believe that Trump was involved in a conspiracy with Putin to take over the USA. - Many peo…
> I do agree, however, that the Christian church is predatory. It is matriarchal and is basically a system of domestication.
First, outside of the increasingly unrealized ecumenical aspirations of the various Christian Churches, there is no “the Christian Church” in the sense of a single human institution.
And virtually none of the various Christian Churches are matriarchal, they tend to be quite patriarchal, both internally and in the structure they advocate for broader society.
Re: Ask HN: At a peak of my dev career, I hate my life
#498Earlier quoted context omitted.
Honest question - was this sarcasm?
It's not sarcastic at all but I suppose it's sort of tongue-in-cheek? Antivaxxers are probably not highly intelligent.. But they will think they are because of Dunning-Kruger effect.
> Antivaxxers are probably not highly intelligent.. But they will think they are because of Dunning-Kruger effect.
DK is basically “people of all ability levels tend to see themselves slightly closer to the 70th percentile than they are”, not “people at the bottom see themselves at the top”.
Re: Ask HN: At a peak of my dev career, I hate my life
#499Go and introduce yourself to your neighbors from above
Re: Ask HN: At a peak of my dev career, I hate my life
#500Earlier quoted context omitted.
While I haven't lived in Portland, when I visited in 2019 I was like, this is a larger Santa Cruz. And I have lived in Santa Cruz so I can make some extrapolations: * Stifling lack of local prospects; in SC, the majority of jobs were "over the hill" (SJ/SV) making it a bedroom community. Portland has a little more going on for itself but it doesn't have the strong jobs pull of a city like Austin, which Portland has o…
IMHO, you missed the biggest point: Lack of sunshine. Outside of summer, it's mostly cloudy, coldish, and generally dreary weather.