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Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

kapwing.com

531–540 of 666 posts

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#531

Amazing. The author spends a lot of time to tell us a very convincing story how sexism affects people in our industry, and the Hacker News thread is full of people rationalizing it. - it's only because people think you're a bot - it's because of your target audience - it's because chat widgets are annoying - you don't really have enough data to make any conclusions How much will it take to convince the average HN rea…

What's wrong with rationalizing things? Should we just take it for pure truth because a woman said it?

I think rationalizing is fine.

But people tend to rationalize selectively, and only when it benefits their worldview. The parent comment made that clear, but you sidestepped that point. I don't think the downvotes are necessarily virtue signaling.

I was temped to downvote you, though. I live with a woman, and know many more, and I've been party to the sexism and harassment they deal with on a day to day basis. I've been party to people not believing what they say because of what's between their legs (eg "...take it for pure truth because a woman said it?"). I've been party to my wife being groped on a crowd, and seeing young teenage girls being catcalled by grown men. I've had female friends who have been raped. At this point, the evidence is more than anecdotal to me.

I find myself wondering, when I read comments like yours, if the people who make them have absolutely no connection with any women at all.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#532

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What's wrong with rationalizing things? Should we just take it for pure truth because a woman said it?

Judging by the downvotes I guess we really shouldn't think rationally about things. Ok, lesson learned. Thank you very much :) Actually NOT. I will not yield to those virtue signaling pricks!

"Rationalize" != "think rationally", despite the similarity in the words.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#533

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's not. It's Popper's Paradox of Tolerance put into action. Society does not have an unlimited responsibility to tolerate the intolerant, because "Unlimited tolerance must lead to the disappearance of tolerance." https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox_of_tolerance

The problem is that, basically, no one agrees on what should be tolerable in polite society and what shouldn't be. And, in GPs case, it isn't 'society' taking action on someone, it is an individual. Is drawing a cartoon of Muhommad deserving of being fired on the spot?

Am I compelled to hire someone who advocates my murder?

The nature of the paradox is that tolerance must be limited in some way, which implies judgment calls.

Freedom of speech prevents the force of government from falling on those who advocate unpopular opinions. It doesn't extend to commerce.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#534

And, no one should have any issue reporting those people to their employers. If you act like scum, particularly with your employer in your profile, society should punish you.

Is your life virtuous and pure? Or do you just hide or anonymize yourself when you do shitty things?

It's a low bar, but I certainly don't harass or troll people. If that's amazing to you, seek help.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#535
post #416

And, no one should have any issue reporting those people to their employers. If you act like scum, particularly with your employer in your profile, society should punish you.

People are always so quick to jump to this line of reasoning when popular opinion agrees with them. Would you be fine with losing your job for wrongthink if - or rather, when - social opinion swings the other way? It doesn't matter if you're right or wrong - you should be punished for disagreeing with society! Societal retribution for "wrongthink" is not the right answer. It's how you end up with LGBT losing their jo…

And people are always so quick to falsely equivocate awful behavior and stuff like being pro-LGBT rights.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#536

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Did you miss the post I was responding to? Let me help you out. >I also see some pretty terrible behavior in Facebook comments on news sites/blogs right next to people's names, employer and a photo of them with their kid. Did you miss what this thread is about? It's about rude or trolling messages and sexual harassment . Are you intentionally missing the point?

Trolling behavior is generally against the rules of these sites. Often, it's actually a crime. If someone is harassing or threatening someone, just report them to the actual authority that will hold them accountable. If they don't do their jobs, by all means start calling their bosses, take the issue to twitter, write your Congressperson, etc.

Eh, it's pretty well known that the police will rarely, if ever, do anything about online stuff. They either lack the resources or the training to do so.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#537
post #420

And, no one should have any issue reporting those people to their employers. If you act like scum, particularly with your employer in your profile, society should punish you.

Your personal views should not affect your employment. Take your facism elsewhere.

There's a difference between personal views and harassment or abuse.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#538
post #518

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Did you miss the post I was responding to? Let me help you out. >I also see some pretty terrible behavior in Facebook comments on news sites/blogs right next to people's names, employer and a photo of them with their kid. Did you miss what this thread is about? It's about rude or trolling messages and sexual harassment. Are you intentionally missing the point? Edit: reposting my previous reply, because you made the s…

I don't think he did. It doesn't matter whether you believe Hitler was right or that Dipsy is the best teletubby, I believe everyone is entitled to their behaviour and beliefs during their time off work without any professional consequences to it. If there are legal consequences from something like harassement, then report to the correct authorities. No offence but it's it's people like you that make me glad I live i…

You live in a country where you can actively promote Hitler's ideology on FB, with your company in your profile, without any repercussions? Which country is this?

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#539
Since she seems surprised about this, I wonder if the author has had any social media profiles at all, because these kind of responses come through every channel — be it website customer support chat or Facebook messenger or chat sites or matchmaking/dating sites or even plain old IRC. All that you need are to have a female sounding name and (if the platform supports it,) a picture that looks like a girl or woman. It used to be that such names would get private "asl?" (standing for "age, sex, location?") messages before social media came into existence. Any mention of "f" and a somewhat younger age would get lots of messages of different kinds — enough to prevent real girls/women from using female sounding names or nicknames online.

As for anonymous nicknames or handles, I'm all for it. While people who want to say nasty stuff will do it even with their real names attached to it (there are many examples from Facebook), the negative effect that real names (or forcing them) has is two fold — it increases harassment for girls/women (and some others who are normally discriminated against), and it makes people censor themselves more than they need to (more so in environments like Facebook where most people have one identity to interact with different circles and relationships in their lives). The Internet was always a place to use self-chosen nicknames and handles, and the kind of community shapes the interactions more than the mere ability to use a nickname/handle.

As someone who values privacy and is strongly opposed to profiling, censorship and surveillance, I wouldn't want a world where anonymous/pseudo-anonymous communication doesn't exist

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