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Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

kapwing.com

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Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#511

Post by Consultant32452 »

Bartweiss wrote: post #490
Consultant32452 wrote: post #441

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think a plurality of kids in middle and high school go through this phase whether they play video games or not. It's a normal part of growing up. You've got lots of new hormones and frustrations in life. It's a time of testing all sorts of social boundaries. I wonder to what extent gaming increases this phenomenon from the norm, or whether it's just a different avenue through which these things are expressed.

I have a rather vivid memory from age 15 of someone tossing off a "your mom" joke to someone whose mother had just died. It was, obviously, a terrible moment. And it was far from the only thing of that sort that happened. I remember really upsetting people on a couple of occasions because I thought about the likely, harmless consequence of what I was saying, and didn't consider whether it could cut some people much d…

It's worth noting that all of this behavior is normal and healthy. It's part of socialization to learn how far you can push. Some back and forth teasing will be better for you and enjoyable for everyone, too much will make you an outcast. Additionally, this is a part of establishing or figuring out your position in the social dominance hierarchy.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#512

Post by ashelmire »

DarkWiiPlayer wrote: post #354
ashelmire wrote: post #274

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You can believe sexual harassment is everywhere and also believe chat widgets are annoying. Sadly, women getting harassed on the internet by anonymous strangers, while unfortunate, is not a novel revelation. Anyone who says it isn’t common has their head in the sand. You can’t help people like that.

A single message is not harassment though.

If you're talking about the legal definition, that depends largely on your jurisdiction (there are many where a single instance does constitute harassment; perhaps most states in the US require a "culture"). Unfortunately again, common language and legal language overlap but with slightly different meanings.

However, in every case where multiple messages were sent, that's clearly harassment in many jurisdictions. Additionally, the sum of actions by multiple people constitutes harassment. Also many jurisdictions will consider it harassment if there is a single, severe incident. However, many of these laws only apply when a co-worker is the harasser.

In summation: your statement is not necessarily correct.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#513

Post by matt4077 »

kelvin0 wrote: post #267

Well there's missing the avatar picture taking a backside selfie in yoga pants, for scientific completeness of the tests... All jokes aside, I can't say I'm surprised by the results. The internet allows to remove 2 important things humans use for communication: Physical presence (5 senses) and body language (non verbal communication). I doubt any of the 'offenders' in the tests would do anything even remotely close t…

> backside selfie in yoga pants

See... that right there is sexual harassment. But it’s just a joke, right?

> changing the avatar is a good idea

“It’s so easy to avoid harassment! Just make sure nobody knows you’re a woman!”

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#514

Post by Bartweiss »

muse900 wrote: post #425
alkonaut wrote: post #191

Kids who grew up in an environment where anonymous interaction is the norm (such as kids who have anonymous social chats at school, or do in-game chats etc) have grown so accustomed to it that I don't think they even see it as sexist, racist, bullying etc. Most would probably never say any of this to someones' face, not out of fear of consequences but simply because they know better. Yet in anonymous contact they don…

As a kid I grew up playing video games. Around the age of 13 I switched on to online video games. I spent too much time on games like w3/wow etc. As a kid being exposed to such an environment wasn't good at all. After years, now being in my 30's I can totally understand how online gaming changed me and my interactions vs people that haven't played online games etc are completely different. I used to have a complete d…

Honestly, I feel like you might be overestimating the degree to which this is specific to video games.

I certainly recognize the sort of behavior you're describing, and it makes intuitive sense that online gaming would worsen it with anonymity and dehumanized opponents.

But in practice? As a teenager I watched people say "I hope you get cancer" or worse on the field, in the locker room, or even in the cafeteria. Or jump straight to knowingly personal mockery, or just beat somebody up because it was fun to hurt them. And it doesn't necessarily go away when people get out of school. "That guy likes a different sports team than me, let me tell him how he should die painfully" is something people think and act on every day.

It's still quite possible that online gaming sparks this behavior from times and moments it would happen otherwise. I certainly don't mean to presume anything about you personally - you know your own story better than any generalization.

But as a social pattern? I worry that we're mostly upset about online gaming and cyberbullying because they're new and different. We tolerate an amount of cruelty and violence outside of those settings that I think we're very slow to acknowledge that maybe the digital harm has just made more visible something we've been dealing with for a long time.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#516

Post by oh_sigh »

grasshopperpurp wrote: post #402

And, no one should have any issue reporting those people to their employers. If you act like scum, particularly with your employer in your profile, society should punish you.

Is your life virtuous and pure? Or do you just hide or anonymize yourself when you do shitty things?

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#517

Post by ethbro »

enlightenedfool wrote: post #445
Nadya wrote: post #416

Earlier quoted context omitted.

People are always so quick to jump to this line of reasoning when popular opinion agrees with them. Would you be fine with losing your job for wrongthink if - or rather, when - social opinion swings the other way? It doesn't matter if you're right or wrong - you should be punished for disagreeing with society! Societal retribution for "wrongthink" is not the right answer. It's how you end up with LGBT losing their jo…

Excellent point. The idea that someone should lose the job and livelihood because of a wrong doing is madness. The punishment should cause a behavior correction and not end of life. Such vengeful society we live in today!

I've seen the distinction between "disagreement" and "being a dick" disappear.

I could phrase a hypothetical opinion two ways:

1) "I think abortion is wrong because I believe in the sanctity of life and that life begins at conception."

2) "Anyone who is pro-abortion is a baby murder."

In the first, a viewpoint is stated in a respectful manner. You may agree or disagree, but the speaker wasn't deliberately demeaning or hostile. In the second, the same opinion was expressed, but in an overtly hostile way.

If we'd like a plural society in which many viewpoints are exchanged, we have to continually challenge ourselves not to conflate the two when hearing or responding to someone else.

And I get it -- it's not easy when one is passionate about something, even when one is willfully trying not to knee-jerk.

But if I either speak disrespectfully, or assume that someone else is being disrespectful regardless of their actual phrasing, then we all end up in the gutter.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#518

Post by lagadu »

grasshopperpurp wrote: post #452
nugi wrote: post #420

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Your personal views should not affect your employment. Take your facism elsewhere.

Did you miss the post I was responding to? Let me help you out. >I also see some pretty terrible behavior in Facebook comments on news sites/blogs right next to people's names, employer and a photo of them with their kid. Did you miss what this thread is about? It's about rude or trolling messages and sexual harassment. Are you intentionally missing the point? Edit: reposting my previous reply, because you made the s…

I don't think he did. It doesn't matter whether you believe Hitler was right or that Dipsy is the best teletubby, I believe everyone is entitled to their behaviour and beliefs during their time off work without any professional consequences to it. If there are legal consequences from something like harassement, then report to the correct authorities.

No offence but it's it's people like you that make me glad I live in a country where employers are harshly punished for taking any actions against you based on your non-work related activities.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#519

Post by oh_sigh »

rectang wrote: post #504
claar wrote: post #496

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I'll fire anyone on the spot who expresses bigoted views Ironically that is technically a bigoted view.

It's not. It's Popper's Paradox of Tolerance put into action. Society does not have an unlimited responsibility to tolerate the intolerant, because "Unlimited tolerance must lead to the disappearance of tolerance." https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox_of_tolerance

The problem is that, basically, no one agrees on what should be tolerable in polite society and what shouldn't be. And, in GPs case, it isn't 'society' taking action on someone, it is an individual.

Is drawing a cartoon of Muhommad deserving of being fired on the spot?

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#520

Post by iamcasen »

Slansitartop wrote: post #423
laci27 wrote: post #348

Earlier quoted context omitted.

China is solving this problem. Every citizen will have it's own score (by 2019 or something) and you get points taken away if any of your online friends or family say bad things about the communist party. It's a solution... but i'm not sure if it's the right one:) here's the article: http://www.wired.co.uk/article/chinese-government-social-cre...

> China is solving this problem China is run by a authoritarian oligarchy that wants to suppress any challenge to it's power. The planned "social credit" system is part of that suppression. FYI, this oligarchy has a list of "perils" that include: > “Western constitutional democracy”; others included promoting “universal values” of human rights, Western-inspired notions of media independence and civic participation [1…

Not sure why you're being down voted. You're absolutely right. The current state of affairs in China should have everyone in a panic. I fully believe that they are leading the way into the future tech-wise, and that before long, all major metropolises will be fully automated with real-time systems that track faces, vehicles, purchases, movements, vacations, etc and then cross-reference all of that data with online activity.

In China right now it's being touted as making everything in life seamless.

To me it's the most terrifying form of the future.

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