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Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

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Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#301

Post by Fnoord »

astura wrote: post #243
losteverything wrote: post #93

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You will screw up your kids just like your parents screwed you up.... You just don't know how yet. But it isn't really screwed up... It is called parenting. Then when u become a grandparent it begins to totally make sense....we all screw up our kids...teaching thwm how to recover is the real deal

As someone who was actually, legitimately, very seriously screwed up by my parents... I don't agree. "Screwing up your kids" and "parenting" are not at all synonymous. Can we please treat this topic with the seriousness it deserves? This dismissal attitude makes me feel physically ill.

You're projecting a bifurcation. "Screwing up your kids" isn't a proposition; it is relative. Every single kid gets "screwed up" in some way (some severe, as you claim you are). The lessons they got taught in life during child and teenage years is their manual for getting themselves fixed afterwards, in order to function in society. If they fail to succeed by themselves, professional help can aid them.

See also Dr. Ingeborg Bosch on Past Reality Integration [1] or this Wikipedia article [2] for an introduction.

> This dismissal attitude makes me feel physically ill

Argumentum ad misericordiam [3].

[1] http://www.psychiatrictimes.com/articles/introduction-psycho...

[2] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Integrative_psychotherapy

[3] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Appeal_to_pity

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#302

Post by tomcam »

codekilla wrote: post #289
ikurei wrote: post #263

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is probably one of the most important questions possible: How should I teach my kids? I was denied access to computers, and I don't think it did me any good. I'm 27, so a bit old for this topic, but my house was specially up to date bc of my dad's job. The internet was dangerous and diabolic in my mom's mind though, and my access to computers was extremely limited. This, I feel, made me want computers even more.…

Raising children with technology is certainly a challenge. I have 5 kids, oldest 8 years old, youngest 15 months, living in a condo in LA because...you know......f'ing real estate prices, single family homes with 1200 square feet are 1.3 million in our district. So how do you let kids be free if they can't even go outside really?...and multiple kids in a condo without some kind of T.V. or tablet is utter insanity. It…

I love that you had five kids. Kids are wonderful and our population is declining. You’re doing the best thing for yourself – and the best thing for society.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#303

Post by shaki-dora »

nawtacawp wrote: post #41

Does the same hold true in Europe?

I'm in Berlin, and in my 30s. I'm partying more now than I ever did as a teenager or in my 20s.

This city has a somewhat unique club culture with a bend towards left-wing politics and art (plus electronic music and psychedelics). It's gotten so big that the local government has started to consider the scene economically important, and works to protect the venues from the threats of gentrification.

Festivals (in all of Europe) also seem to be growing every year. Plus there are of course house parties–I don't go as often, but most students I know do every weekend.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#304

Post by watwut »

codekilla wrote: post #289
ikurei wrote: post #263

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is probably one of the most important questions possible: How should I teach my kids? I was denied access to computers, and I don't think it did me any good. I'm 27, so a bit old for this topic, but my house was specially up to date bc of my dad's job. The internet was dangerous and diabolic in my mom's mind though, and my access to computers was extremely limited. This, I feel, made me want computers even more.…

Raising children with technology is certainly a challenge. I have 5 kids, oldest 8 years old, youngest 15 months, living in a condo in LA because...you know......f'ing real estate prices, single family homes with 1200 square feet are 1.3 million in our district. So how do you let kids be free if they can't even go outside really?...and multiple kids in a condo without some kind of T.V. or tablet is utter insanity. It…

What do you think is benefit of fighting that pink?

(Full disclosure: I hate pink and was shocked too over how much of it grandparents and such forced on us and in what way. But I am still curious about your reasons. )

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#305

Post by dragonwriter »

gowld wrote: post #229
toasterlovin wrote: post #135

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You might be surprised by the number of 5-8 year olds with cell phones. And I fully expect smart watches to eventually end up on the wrist of every single kid that spends significant time away from their parents.

smart watches are peripherals, not communications devices, right? you still need a phone to make your smart watch communicate

> smart watches are peripherals, not communications devices, right?

The most popular ones in the US are, but ones that are fully independent phones with their own SIM have been available for some time.

Just for some examples: https://www.smartgeekwrist.com/standalone-smartwatch-sim-car...

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#306

Post by moretai »

I remember me and a friend(same age as me) went to a concert with my brother and his friend(same age as him). We offered them drinks and things, and they declined. After the concert, I was in a state of paranoia and my friend was puking in the toilet. My brother and his friend were just sitting quietly in a separate room, chilling, watching netflix on their own computers.

It was odd.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#307

Post by sam-mueller »

westmeal wrote: post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

There's another part of the trend that is less obvious: the social giants haven't focused on making it easier to hang out with friends IRL. On the surface that statement might seem counterintuitive; after all, if I want to message a friend for lunch, I can just DM them with messenger/imsg/snap/insta. When I want to invite a bunch of friends to my super bowl party, just create a fb event. Simple right?

Not quite. There are a million opportunities in between to have genuine, in-person connections with friends that don't necessarily fall into those two categories. Just to prove it, here's a thought exercise. Take your top 5 friends, local people you'd be most inclined to hang with on any given day. Now ask yourself, what are they doing tonight on this random Wednesday? If you had trouble answering this question, you're not alone. We're all so busy nowadays, it's become harder to line up those fleeting moments of availability that we do have. Now think about how many intersecting pockets of free time amongst your friends that were probably missed in the past month. Some of these opportunities could've been a quick cup of coffee together, swinging by to watch Isaiah's debut with the Cavs, or last minute studying for mid terms.

Coordination has to become easier, because everything else competing for your free time has become easier. This is one of the primary reasons why I left Yahoo and founded a new startup called Blink. We're creating an app that bridges the gap between your phone and your real life.

We are eventually planning to do a "Show HN" to give folks a preview of what we're building, but I couldn't help but notice quite a few here (westmeal, ktta, joaomacp, julianh95 and others) who are both young in age and have quite a sophisticated understanding of how our social trends are evolving. If you're under 25, we'd really love to get your feedback on where we are going with Blink! You can check it out here (iOS only):

https://blinkwith.me/hn-teens-dont-party

We're also looking for a junior iOS engineer who's as passionate about this stuff as we are, but that's also an entirely different HN post altogether!

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#308

Post by dragonwriter »

thousandautumns wrote: post #277
mrguyorama wrote: post #89

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There's also the fact that children are typically hurt by people they know, not strangers

Again, its hard to separate that phenomenon from potentially confounding effects. Is the fact that children are typically hurt by people they know the result of parents being reluctant to let their kids out on the street by themselves, thereby limiting the opportunities for potential strangers to harm them?

Again, the effect precedes the behavior change, so is unlikely to be a result of it.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#309

Post by eeZah7Ux »

workthrowaway27 wrote: post #101
dragonwriter wrote: post #91

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Society is sick, let's face it, and technology is largely to blame. Technology is never to blame for anything, because technology is not a moral actor; people may be to blame for the manner in which they use technology. OTOH, people have been falsely conflating “the youth of today seem to have a different lifestyle than I preferred in my youth” with “society is sick” for at least as long as we have historical evide…

There's lots of evidence that people in their early 20s and under are psychologically different than older people (higher rates of anxiety/depression at the same age, etc.). Anecdotally, I've noticed that people don't talk to strangers as much on planes anymore as when I was a child. I guess you could argue that technology isn't to blame, but technology changes people. And it's hard not to use technology when it's so…

You are confusing technology, defined as "the application of scientific knowledge for practical purposes", with smartphone/OS design choices taken by companies that want to create addiction in users.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#310

Post by ktta »

joaomacp wrote: post #203
ktta wrote: post #163

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm 20 and I have my experience to share too. My parents didn't really limit me going out. In fact, they encouraged it. But I found the internet to be way more fascinating compared to my friends. I did have friends and a 'normal' life, but I was an introvert by any measure. I had people to hang out with at school and places to hang out with friends after, but I never wanted to go out and goof off. I want to say it is…

22 here. I agree with everything except the ads part. Me and my friends are so used to identifying and quickly ignoring ads from a young age, that they have become largely uneffective on us. Comparatively my not-so-techie friends and family, that haven't grown up so used to ads, tend to be more influenced by them and purchase more stuff (my dad clicks facebook ads more regularly than me and my friends).

Both the sibling comments to me are right. Kids are impressionable, and you being smart doesn't mean everyone else is. Also the people making ads are definitely smarter than you and me.

Someone put it this way regarding the recent machine learning researcher craze. It went something like - PhDs are currently being paid millions to study where to place the pixels on your screen to influence you.

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