Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: Developers with kids, how do you skill up?

news.ycombinator.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

421–430 of 530 posts

Re: Ask HN: Developers with kids, how do you skill up?

#421

Post by pavel_lishin »

pm90 wrote: post #418
pavel_lishin wrote: post #410

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> > it's kinda taboo to say you wish you didn't have kids! > I think any society that has thrived has had some variation of this cultural trait. I think in a lot of societies, having kids doesn't quite restrict your options as much as modern American society - prior to this century, you'd likely still live surrounded by family and a community who could help you with a lot of the childcare. You could drop the kids off…

I agree completely. And I imagine, before the internet, having an extended family would have a lot of "tribal knowledge" about all the little idiosyncrasies of raising children as well.

That can be both good and bad, though; I was talking to my stepbrother - who is 30 years my senior - and when he was raising his kids, who are my age, putting them on their stomach to sleep was the medically advised strategy. Today, that's considered a risk for SIDS.

I'd say that 90% of the benefit of the extended family would be people who would come and be a warm body to sit with the kid, or bring you food, at least for the first year.

Re: Ask HN: Developers with kids, how do you skill up?

#422

Post by matwood »

pm90 wrote: post #373
BowBun wrote: post #343

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think a lot of people can sympathize, but as you said, it's kinda taboo to say you wish you didn't have kids! I think you get the same feeling, a loss of freedoms, from any significant evolution in life. Leaving college: "I wish I could still go out drinking every other day and perform the best in my peer-circle" Getting to a more serious romantic stage in your relationship: "I wish I could still play video games a…

> it's kinda taboo to say you wish you didn't have kids! I think you get the same feeling, a loss of freedoms, from any significant evolution in life. I think any society that has thrived has had some variation of this cultural trait. Its easy to see why: without lots of children the society would simply die out. This is a very nuanced point though. As a young, somewhat single developer, I'm incredibly grateful to wo…

Don't let anyone with kids fool you. It's perfectly fine to never have kids, and becoming much more common.

My wife and I decided before we got married we were probably not going to have kids. Now that we have been married for years and enjoy our life of independence, it has to turned solidly to never.

Re: Ask HN: Developers with kids, how do you skill up?

#423

Post by cholantesh »

geebee wrote: post #407
cholantesh wrote: post #255

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>Learning another SPA framework that solves the problems of the last framework, while introducing new problems? Learning yet another way to bundle your web content? A new transpiled language to patch the holes in JavaScript? I understand that HN is (probably?) pretty web-centric, but this portion of your comment makes me wonder if it's just the web that's fucked. I'm not hearing a ton of complaints re: burnout or bei…

Every now and then, things go haywire in the web world. The last time I recall feeling this way was 2005-ish, when Java frameworks took off. Previously, small to medium sized java apps used servlets, jsp, jdbc, and something along the lines of the "java cookbook." It was, in fact, inefficient, with lots of typing, and it was difficult to manage dependencies. I think the work that went into dependency injection, ORMs,…

Hey, thanks for this in-depth response. I've generally felt that thinking high-level and not getting bogged down in implementation details is a great idea, but I do try to keep up, only really investing in a technology when it seems established (for instance, Angular a couple years ago, and VueJS now). Occasionally I get restless, and I do feel that tying myself as much as I have to .NET has limited me in some ways, but I guess there's a balance to be sought.

Re: Ask HN: Developers with kids, how do you skill up?

#424

Post by magic_beans »

pmarreck wrote: post #286
shakna wrote: post #149

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My daughter just turned five months. Her favorite game at the moment is to press all the buttons on my keyboard. Whether or not a computer is remotely nearby. I might not have much time to bang away on code, but seeing her proud of grabbing and biting a book, is much more exciting.

> but seeing her proud of grabbing and biting a book, is much more exciting. this is exactly the sort of common statement from parents that is completely impenetrably unfathomable by non-parents and may even frighten the latter a bit as to how something so superficially insipid can attain a compelling and inexplicable level of fascination Of course, you could say similar things about non-parents playing games for hou…

Watching a brand new human go from a useless blob to a walking, biting, hand-waving mini-human is pretty fascinating stuff, especially if said tiny human belongs to you.

Re: Ask HN: Developers with kids, how do you skill up?

#425

Post by magic_beans »

lt wrote: post #252
tehwalrus wrote: post #117

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have both this "to learn" list and an ever expanding bookshelf (which grows faster than I can read the damn things, mostly thanks to recommendations in HN comments). Being 5 months into the parenting adventure, I seem to get a few hours a month on each side project at the moment! It really does make you prioritise. (And work harder on things I can do on my rail commute than other tasks). I haven't got to the "wants…

I've come to terms with the fact that my ever expanding bookshelf (and steam library) are now my kid's (eventually)

Some of my fondest memories are stealing the books from my mom's library.

She didn't mind one bit, and there was always someone to discuss the book when I was done!

Re: Ask HN: Developers with kids, how do you skill up?

#426

Post by magic_beans »

debaserab2 wrote: post #341
caseysoftware wrote: post #266

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My two year old is super chill and rarely makes a sound. If he does, I give him a clicky pen and he's set for another 5-10 minutes. If I open a cartoon on Youtube (muted), it buys me another 5-10 minutes. I get your concern but it's a non-issue here. Edit: Thinking more about this.. If my team was deeply offended by this, I don't want to work there. My boys are important to me and if they're not willing to accept tha…

Just FYI, you might have coworkers that aren't all that interested in conversing with your children during conference calls. I know it makes me uncomfortable to have a forced interaction with a coworkers child. I doubt anyone would be deeply offended by it, but do keep in mind that not everyone is as comfortable with your kid as you are. If you have a team that embraces it, that's great - just don't assume everyone a…

There's a big difference between waving at a coworker's kid for a second during a video conference (why would this make you uncomfortable?) and someone actually bringing a child to the workplace (which OP didn't do, and would actually be disruptive).

Re: Ask HN: Developers with kids, how do you skill up?

#427

Post by magic_beans »

WhiteSource1 wrote: post #237
quantumhobbit wrote: post #230

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I had a video call interview recently and my interviewer was being attacked by his new puppy during the call. Although distracting it made me want to work there.

The comparison between kids & pets is amusing. So many workplaces are pet-friendly (despite people having allergies or phobias) but try bringing your toddler to the office.

Ok... there's a pretty huge difference between a puppy and a toddler. A toddler is a lot smarter, and a LOT more disruptive than any puppy (not to say puppies aren't, but they don't have two hands either).

Re: Ask HN: Developers with kids, how do you skill up?

#428

Post by magic_beans »

jinfiesto wrote: post #379
bshimmin wrote: post #177

Earlier quoted context omitted.

OK, I'm completely baffled by this. Am I the only one who thinks taking your young children on a conference call is somewhere between totally unprofessional and, well, very annoying? I get that your children are your priority - but surely they shouldn't be the priority of everyone else on that call? Is the work at hand not the priority? My 3 year old makes a lot of noise and is quite prone to tantrums. Some of my cli…

I occasionally have my 1 year old with me on calls. Besides the occasional burbling, the only issue is that she occasionally farts or burps and then cackles loudly to herself. I wouldn't have her with me on large calls, generally only on 1-on-1 calls.

I still laugh at my farts and burps.

...

Re: Ask HN: Developers with kids, how do you skill up?

#429

Post by pmarreck »

tehwalrus wrote: post #385
pmarreck wrote: post #286

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> but seeing her proud of grabbing and biting a book, is much more exciting. this is exactly the sort of common statement from parents that is completely impenetrably unfathomable by non-parents and may even frighten the latter a bit as to how something so superficially insipid can attain a compelling and inexplicable level of fascination Of course, you could say similar things about non-parents playing games for hou…

The thing is, you've just spent a month watching this pair of eyes follow you around the room, and this face very slowly get the hang of smiling (initially it is only when they are defecating). When they get to the stage of being able to hold objects, this is a major event. When they get the hang of putting stuff in their own mouths during teething, rather than screaming until you let them bite your finger, is anothe…

Oh, I wasn't knocking it! I'm sure that (possibly soon?), whenever I get around to making life, I'll be quite fascinated by it (I seem to find fascination often! There's a lot of complexity out there!)
Post reply on HN