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Leap: An Online Community for Women
251–260 of 364 posts
Re: Leap: An Online Community for Women
#252Earlier quoted context omitted.
I really wish your experience was unique. A colleague was groped. She didn't report it. It would have likely diminished her future prospects. A friend was asked out on dates, unsolicited, multiple times by coworkers. She just had to laugh it off. Women at a previous employment reported not being taken as seriously as men in meetings, and being passed over for promotions in favour of less qualified men. A friend repor…
A friend was asked out on dates, unsolicited, multiple times by coworkers. I’m a geek and don’t know the first thing about dating, but doesn’t at least one of the parties involved need to receive an unsolicited request? Isn’t that how it works?
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Re: Leap: An Online Community for Women
#253Earlier quoted context omitted.
Disclaimer: not in any way attempting to diminish your experience. Only adding my own, to broaden the conversation. It can be a similar experience for men (although it's definitely not something talked about). I've had a female coworker walk up behind me repeatedly and give me unsolicited back rubs and ask me if I wanted to go to an empty office. I've been flirted with and hit on repeatedly. I've had a group of women…
Those experiences are awful. I do not dispute that there are male victims, including in the workplace. I absolutely agree that "People shouldn't do this to other People". That said, women as a group are disproportionately on the receiving end of improper workplace behaviour overwhelmingly perpetrated by men. And you can't address that dynamic without first acknowledging that it exists and putting words to it. And so,…
Well, yes woman as a group selected for that feature- because it was way comfier to not take the spear and ride the mamoth for a steak.
Now that the bred drug addicted idiot has done his deed he is free to walk out and leave the danger free hunting party to the civilized and cultured ones?
If im a man, and i despise this attitude, this entitletment for nothing but the organs one gets born with- why m i not free to start a company that rejects the kind of people that reject me? Is it still that moment the beast lays slayen in the grass, that the clan starts distributing what they have not hunted?
Sex has no place at work, none at all. Thus lets create departments/companys of mutually sexually uninterested people and may the best one win.
Re: Leap: An Online Community for Women
#254Honest question, does HN feel unwelcoming or uncomfortable for women? In particular: “I’ve found that some conversations online escalate to shouting matches quickly” do female HN users identify this with HN? Not saying Leap shouldn’t exist or anything, I’m just wondering if HN has these particular issues that I haven’t personally recognised.
I'm a woman and I love HN. I think the vibe here can feel unwelcoming to timid people, and disproportionately more women than men are timid.
Re: Leap: An Online Community for Women
#255Earlier quoted context omitted.
Those experiences are awful. I do not dispute that there are male victims, including in the workplace. I absolutely agree that "People shouldn't do this to other People". That said, women as a group are disproportionately on the receiving end of improper workplace behaviour overwhelmingly perpetrated by men. And you can't address that dynamic without first acknowledging that it exists and putting words to it. And so,…
Well, yes woman as a group selected for that feature- because it was way comfier to not take the spear and ride the mamoth for a steak. Now that the bred drug addicted idiot has done his deed he is free to walk out and leave the danger free hunting party to the civilized and cultured ones? If im a man, and i despise this attitude, this entitletment for nothing but the organs one gets born with- why m i not free to st…
You've been making a habit of breaking the HN guidelines. We ban accounts that do that, so would you please read https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html and take the spirit of this site to heart? That means thoughtful discussion, not rants.
Re: Leap: An Online Community for Women
#256Yes, finally! I've always said, the way to end gender discrimination is to create a secretive forum that selects members based on gender discrimination.
We've banned this account for repeatedly breaking the HN guidelines and ignoring our requests to stop.
Re: Leap: An Online Community for Women
#257Can someone help me understand how this site is not sexist and discriminatory against men?
Do you also consider separate men and women's bathrooms prejudicial and sexist?
Here in Sweden I have seen the use of unisex bathrooms to become more common, and left-block politicians have argued in favor of unisex bathrooms as being more inclusive towards transgenders. All office buildings I have been in has had unisex bathrooms that consisted of small rooms with a single toilet and sink. No need to separate people if only one person will be in there at a time.
Re: Leap: An Online Community for Women
#258I have seen research that women who go to all female colleges tend to do better career-wise. So I don't think the idea of a female enclave as a means to inoculate women against problematic social norms is without merit. If you have never done this before, let me suggest that if you like the culture it currently has, you need to be really leery of making significant changes, such as deciding you will welcome men at so…
Single-sex schools is generally perceived to give better results in grades and careers, with research to back it up. They are also perceived to give worse citizens in term of empathy and understanding. This theory is notoriously used by the military in many nations. By strengthening the in-group feeling you gain several traits such as increased confidence and feeling of belonging, and you increase tensions against th…
Single-sex schools is generally perceived to give better results in grades and careers, with research to back it up. They are also perceived to give worse citizens in term of empathy and understanding.
Women have a tendency to be too empathetic and understanding and society tends to hang a lot of expectations on them to be so. If women want careers, being a little less caring and a little more goal oriented seems like a constructive outcome to me.
Re: Leap: An Online Community for Women
#259Earlier quoted context omitted.
There's a certain style to HN discussions that feels completely natural if you've been here long enough, yet may appear excessively antagonistic to people not used to it. Specifically, 90%+ of all comments are of the "you're wrong, because..." variety. Note that there's nothing wrong with such comments: they make up a large part of any group's pub conversations as well, for example. Yet there are other sentiments tha…
I don't think you're being fair to the community here. It's true that such comments exist, and so do many other kinds. Many users share personal experiences. Many express vulnerability. Self-doubt, questions, and comments expanding on others' ideas are highly represented here, and we value them tremendously. I puzzled for years over why people would say things like "90%+ of all comments" that are so obviously (to me)…
I'm sorry if my comment was understood as criticising perceived "aggressiveness", and I agree that the specific complaint about "shouting matches" certainly does not accurately describe HN. Although aggressiveness can be part of what I was talking about, I'd rather use the term "contrariness"–one you have also used on occasion to describe the typical commenter, if I recall correctly.
I will also happily admit to be part of that dynamic, and I don't think it should reflect negatively on any comment, or commenter, or even any single online community.
It just seems valid to believe that there are other modes of communication, and that it could be worthwhile to explore if there are mechanisms to bring those to the front more often.
Re: Leap: An Online Community for Women
#260Earlier quoted context omitted.
A friend was asked out on dates, unsolicited, multiple times by coworkers. I’m a geek and don’t know the first thing about dating, but doesn’t at least one of the parties involved need to receive an unsolicited request? Isn’t that how it works?
If it is a setting where asking is potentially problematic -- like work -- it is best to either broach the subject more delicately or don't ask unless you are confident you know the answer is yes. Just asking cold calling style is not the only option for approaching such things.
> don't ask unless you are confident you know the answer is yes.
I don't know about the US, but where I come from you never know that the answer is yes until you ask. Unless you are approaching a prostitute.