Maybe there could be a new kind of social network, one where in order to maintain your online friendship connections, you have to occasionally/physically get together with your friends and if it doesn't happen it means that the connection doesn't really mean anything so you gradually lose it. This would automatically accomplish what some people with hundreds of fb friends try to do by cleaning up their friend list by asking those who want to remain friends to reply.
Life of solitude: A loneliness crisis is looming
151–160 of 168 posts
Re: Life of solitude: A loneliness crisis is looming
#152Earlier quoted context omitted.
Ah, the old negativity-masquerading-as-insight trick. HN really needs to do something about its implicit approval of such foolery tarted up as meaningful commentary.
Those exact same words apply to your comment. And to this one. :)
That's like saying intolerance of intolerance is intolerant.
In fact, I'd like to have simply said, "stop being an asshole", but that sort of direct, rude comment gets downvoted here on HN. Meanwhile, an extremely rude, condescending, dismissive, but roundabout comment stays neutral or is even upvoted.
Re: Life of solitude: A loneliness crisis is looming
#153[deleted]
Re: Life of solitude: A loneliness crisis is looming
#154Earlier quoted context omitted.
Those exact same words apply to your comment. And to this one. :)
That's like saying intolerance of intolerance is intolerant. In fact, I'd like to have simply said, "stop being an asshole", but that sort of direct, rude comment gets downvoted here on HN. Meanwhile, an extremely rude, condescending, dismissive, but roundabout comment stays neutral or is even upvoted.
That's true.
I think it could be interesting if people on HN actively tried to flip their negative comments into a point of discussion.
For example, if we instead said "You sound like you have stories to tell, do you have any experience with bad therapists? What could they have done better?" then the conversation could continue down a more interesting path.
Re: Life of solitude: A loneliness crisis is looming
#155Earlier quoted context omitted.
As a recent college graduate in the US, this is exactly how I feel. In college, there was very little privacy. I shared a room with a roommate, and that room was one of two in a shared suite, with two other people in the other room and a common bathroom shared by all four people. I now share a 2br apartment with a roommate. I have a private bedroom, but a shared living room and kitchen. My apartment happens to be in…
If you're interested in this phenomenon, you might like Paul Fussell's Class: A Guide Through the American Status System http://www.phenomenologycenter.org/course/status.htm
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Re: Life of solitude: A loneliness crisis is looming
#156Earlier quoted context omitted.
As a recent college graduate in the US, this is exactly how I feel. In college, there was very little privacy. I shared a room with a roommate, and that room was one of two in a shared suite, with two other people in the other room and a common bathroom shared by all four people. I now share a 2br apartment with a roommate. I have a private bedroom, but a shared living room and kitchen. My apartment happens to be in…
If you're interested in this phenomenon, you might like Paul Fussell's Class: A Guide Through the American Status System http://www.phenomenologycenter.org/course/status.htm
Thank you for linking this. This was a very insightful read.
Re: Life of solitude: A loneliness crisis is looming
#157Earlier quoted context omitted.
Try doing volunteer work on the weekends for some cause you care about. One it will get you out of the house and two you will meet people who may be like-minded but are different enough from your co-workers as to be more interesting. I'd recommend also trying church. Not trying to push religion, but it's a way to get involved with a group of people who often organize social or community activities.
Serious question: do you (or anyone else) think it's immoral to go to church as an atheist just to meet people? I get along really well with church people, but I simultaneously hate talking about religion.
As it happens, aside from a church, I also attend a place of worship for another religion which I do not belong to, nor have/will I ever. But I attend as often as I can for cultural and social reasons, including participating in religious festivals. Never had a problem. I have never pretended to be something I am not.
It is not immoral at all. If someone asks, just say you are not a Christian and you are just checking the place out. Don't lie or pretend to be otherwise. None of the Churches I have been to would care if you are not a Christian, but if they do care, go to another church. Churches vary a lot in beliefs and culture. I would not try engage in religious debate to prove their God does not exist ... no religious folks like to hear that (and some may be very offended if done inside a church).
If you are young and near a college, go to a college-orientated church (just about any church close to a large campus).
Re: Life of solitude: A loneliness crisis is looming
#158Earlier quoted context omitted.
Creating an ad system where you post what you can offer to do and what you want, like an offer and demand system, and allow to search by location. Orient this on activities and jobs, and allow people to post their interests so that people can find people that have the same interests in the area. You'd only need to ask users what they want to share, and disallow for people to search beyond their area.
I think this has been tried, although I can't remember the name of it off the top of my head. It'd be really interesting to find out why it didn't work well.
I think it's a niche market because it would deal with businesses, and also with people who are lonely which is the subject of the article.
I don't think it would really be a success at first, but the fact facebook never tried something like that always frustrated me. I guess they did not implement it because they don't want to put complex features like this, and that's understandable. But sometimes an economy can work much better when detailed information is available about what's around your home, which is not the case today. Companies do use advertisement, but single individuals don't and companies don't wait for people to search for their product, and I'm sure there are ways to advertise yourself if you skip the dating stuff, and let everyone post their interests so it can searched and found by people around you. Advertisement only gives voice to people who can afford it because there are too few room for it.
The real problem here is the number of participants (you need a big sample if you want users to find matches) and how it cannot be datamined.
I think it would work if it was anonymised and if it would encourage private talks.
I don't understand why google did not try that, they know how to effectively sort data by topic and category.
Re: Life of solitude: A loneliness crisis is looming
#159Earlier quoted context omitted.
"Now you must work. You must return to your engine. I will be waiting for you here. Come back tomorrow evening . . ." (...) "I am glad that you have found what was the matter with your engine," he said. "Now you can go back home--"
Thanks for pointing these out. Looks like I need to reread the book.
Could you please elaborate on how the quoted passages establish the distinction between grown-up and adult ? It might be the language barrier but I am not getting the point.
Re: Life of solitude: A loneliness crisis is looming
#160Earlier quoted context omitted.
And sweet Sagan , that came out sounding a lot more clinical than I would like. At least that's probably just a product of exhaustion from several hours of karaoke with complete strangers. :)
Were you drunk? Drunk karaoke is best karaoke.
There wasn't any drinking, but that might have helped a little. :)