Burnout Is Real • Hacker News Board

Re: Burnout Is Real

#151

Post by seniorThrowaway » Fri, Jun 25, 2021, 4:04 PM UTC

chapium wrote: post #43

dudus wrote: post #8

I never doubted it was real. But I never really understood what it meant until I was deeply depressed and couldn't get up from bed to go to work anymore. Ended up leaving my job at a FANG and taking a year long sabbatical before rejoining the workforce in a lower/less stressful position for a company not on tech. Sometimes it's still depressing to think o took such a hit in my career. Bit when I remember what I felt…

I went through something similar a few years ago as well. I was able to get out of bed, but I could not focus on a single task for more than a few minutes. I'd frequently get neck pain and migraines late in the week as well. Management was unsympathetic, all they saw was productivity go down. Ultimately I quit and a few months later found myself in a similar job, but actually enjoying what I was doing under a differe…

I had almost the exact same experience with the neck pain and headaches. Also as others said in the thread, it doesn't feel like a decision when it comes time to leave, it feels like an inevitability. My situation was the contract I was on was won by a different prime, one who came in with an unstated but heavily implied by work and meeting load of lots of unpaid overtime. On a project that I had already done years of unpaid overtime on.

Re: Burnout Is Real

#152

Post by ibejoeb » Fri, Jun 25, 2021, 4:05 PM UTC

gfe8ygighjb7 wrote: post #133

culopatin wrote: post #120

I don’t know how to frame this well and I apologize in advance. But I think this idea of “oh wow burnout is real I’m so woke” is a privileged person problem. I don’t mean that burnout is a first world problem, but that this “Burnout is real” is. I struggle to put my head in a place where I can be amazed that burnout is real and that I have to warn others of this “thing” as if it’s not part of millions of people’s liv…

I have worked in retail, dealt with some of the rudest people. Sometimes, I still get angry about it. But my job satisfaction was certainly higher back then. At the end of day, I was tired but I didn't had to think of work anymore. Sure I met some assholes, but I also met some great people, some are still my friends. Other jobs I had were tutoring, security guard, IT helpdesk. All these jobs had higher satisfaction a…

> Now my dev job never really ends, I am constantly thinking about work

100%. Made so much worse by the hard cutover to slack and zoom. Always on, always on camera, always on the record.

To some of the other commenters talking about it being a privilege: turns out that making a lot of money is often associated with shit culture, yes. Probably not a ton of fun driving a few keys up 95 either.

The tweet is cool. He found something that suits him. He does the job and it's done, he has enough money, and he's satisfied. That's a happy existence.

Re: Burnout Is Real

#153

Post by randomopining » Fri, Jun 25, 2021, 4:07 PM UTC

corpMaverick wrote: post #47

username90 wrote: post #29

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'd say burnout happens when you have had too many negative experiences related to work compared to how many positive ones you got and your emotions tells you that it isn't something you should continue doing since it is bad for you. A negative experience could be that you worked long hours and no longer could do things you love, or people screaming at you causing stress etc, humans are really good at being creative…

Yes and lack of Autonomy causes you to have many negative experiences. Particularly in software engineering you need to constantly make many decisions. But if you don't have autonomy you are constantly having to second guess your self. Not based on what you think is best but based on what you think the other person(s) above you will think. It is way of working that drains your energy.

Great point on that. Autonomy actually takes a lot of stress off because you're not trying to artificially conform to what your superiors want.

Re: Burnout Is Real

#154

Post by BuckRogers » Fri, Jun 25, 2021, 4:07 PM UTC

ThrowawayP wrote: post #86

dudus wrote: post #8

I never doubted it was real. But I never really understood what it meant until I was deeply depressed and couldn't get up from bed to go to work anymore. Ended up leaving my job at a FANG and taking a year long sabbatical before rejoining the workforce in a lower/less stressful position for a company not on tech. Sometimes it's still depressing to think o took such a hit in my career. Bit when I remember what I felt…

Having been in a similar situation, my sympathies; I've found it to be a very strange sensation. The burnt-out knows exactly what work tasks they need to do, they know that it's easily within their own capabilities, and they (at a conscious level at least) even desperately want to do the tasks to fulfill their professional obligations (or to simply continue getting paid). But the body just will not do it or forcing i…

That's an interesting way to put it. Throughout 2020 I felt that way. I just could not force myself to work, and I've been in the workforce a while (I'm 39 and had a job non-stop since I was 12). I know how important it is to maintain income. I was thrown into a new position where I didn't know how to do the work, so I was trying to figure everything out with a new platform, and I was mostly isolated without any help. That situation and the pandemic crushed me.

I've had a lot of hard times in life, including the end of a relationship that for some reason left me with tremors in my hands for a couple years afterwards. That eventually went away. I know what suffering is, I can push through it for sure.

Today I'm in the same job, but I think I burned a few work relationships. Not on purpose, I certainly didn't want to. But I'm able to again get myself to work, I no longer feel like I can't control my own actions.

I think everything above is not burnout, but I've never had the luxury of burnout. I'm on my own and I think lose my marriage if I lost my income, I don't want that to happen, so it's do or die. I'm expecting to die early of cancer or other ailment but with no family support financially/emotionally/psychologically, in fact they drain people.. it's pretty much my place in life to make a rich man richer and that's the end of it. I'm happy I can at least be my own man and hold a job. My journey has changed my political view on the world, I started off being one of those competent, capable right wing guys. I still am competent and capable, but I now view the world as unnecessarily harsh on those not born at the finish line. I believe for people that reach retirement age, at bare minimum, Social Security should be guaranteed to be there waiting.

Re: Burnout Is Real

#155

Post by horstmeyer » Fri, Jun 25, 2021, 4:07 PM UTC

Burnout is real, but I built a website for the side business I just started and I'm available for react/C# gigs. Come on! Glad that the author got out of something where he was struggling and into something he's passionate about. But a proper burnout would affect him more.

Edit: Of course if the author feels he had a burnout that's valid. But IMO a burnout hits you much harder.

Re: Burnout Is Real

#156

Post by nudpiedo » Fri, Jun 25, 2021, 4:08 PM UTC

culopatin wrote: post #120

I don’t know how to frame this well and I apologize in advance. But I think this idea of “oh wow burnout is real I’m so woke” is a privileged person problem. I don’t mean that burnout is a first world problem, but that this “Burnout is real” is. I struggle to put my head in a place where I can be amazed that burnout is real and that I have to warn others of this “thing” as if it’s not part of millions of people’s liv…

It is not a privileged person problem. People in less favorable positions or countries also deal with depression and when not treated properly they may abandon themselves, release the tensions from such life against someone nearby (look at the rates of family abuse in countries that are economically depressed, like ex-Soviet union). Some people even commit suicide like we saw Indian farmers who couldn’t fulfill their family expectations in abusive economical conditions. People with resources will have more chances to deal with such situations and survive to report it, but that’s all.

Perhaps the privilege is yours, criticizing people, accusing them of privilege as if they would have done anything wrong and have an undeserved luck. Please stop this “wokee” entitlement.

Re: Burnout Is Real

#157

Post by necrotic_comp » Fri, Jun 25, 2021, 4:08 PM UTC

zwkrt wrote: post #150

necrotic_comp wrote: post #76

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not for nothing, but what you're saying is both classist and doesn't take into account the reality of friendships and roots that can take hold in a place after you've settled in. Things may be expensive, and you may feel trapped on the hedonic treadmill, but moving to a new city or a lower COL area may not be a realistic option for many people.

Classist against who? Land owners? Color me unmoved.

"Poor people have kids all the time, a lot of times they are even smart!" is extraordinarily classist. It makes a joke that based on the assumption that the majority of the time poor people are stupid.

Not a good look to say something like that.

Re: Burnout Is Real

#158

Post by willhslade » Fri, Jun 25, 2021, 4:10 PM UTC

rpmisms wrote: post #119

72mena wrote: post #104

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Would you mind sharing a bit more about that? I like how this rule sounds, but am wondering whether you live in a high-cost area or not. Having two incomes at the level of the fast-food industry seems somewhat limiting, but this depends on where you live and how frugal you are. In other comments I'm also noticing that having a mortgage is part of the need to stay in a high-paying job, so maybe renting can alleviate s…

Sure, I'm in WNY right now, planning to move to Knoxville or Memphis this year. Not super frugal in general, but I save about half my paycheck, wife invests most of hers. We have a house, two cars (only one of them is "nice"), and no kids. We own a house in the suburbs, bought it almost a year ago and have been fixing it up since. Renting is pound-for-pound far more expensive than owning. We couldn't find an apartmen…

> Renting is pound-for-pound far more expensive than owning.

Come to Toronto and say that to my face. I'm going to laugh, and laugh, and...

Re: Burnout Is Real

#159

Post by visarga » Fri, Jun 25, 2021, 4:10 PM UTC

marc_io wrote: post #69

fasteddie31003 wrote: post #23

I gotta take some time off. I'm completely burnt out. It's just not super interesting working for a large company with a stack a mile deep. I'm 6 months into a project that separates one status field into two different status fields. My god, it's boring, but if we fuck any little piece up we break customer data. I just want to work on something new that I'm passionate about. But the things I'm passionate about probab…

In the end, having done what you love will make all the difference. Doing it only for the money will not. It's a worthwhile fight. Your passion will fuel your work and make you through all challenges. Follow your blisters.

playing >> working

Re: Burnout Is Real

#160

Post by seniorThrowaway » Fri, Jun 25, 2021, 4:11 PM UTC

system16 wrote: post #106

NikolaNovak wrote: post #66

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Agreeing with some of the comments here: I feel like I'm stuck in my current high paying job; we have a mortgage, nice car, lots of "stuff". Through conversations with therapist and my spouse I've been slowly realizing how much this stuff owns me, rather than me owning stuff. I never have time to play with my synths or flight-sim setup or even photography anymore. The only time I'm truly relaxed is when we go somewhe…

This is definitely true for me. I went from a digital nomad lifestyle living abroad for over a decade, to moving back to North America and "settling down". In the last three years I've bought a house, fancy car, and accumulated a bunch of "stuff". By most people's standards, what I have accumulated is not that much, but to me it's a huge weight on my shoulders. Not only the physical items, but subscriptions to servic…

>By most people's standards, what I have accumulated is not that much, but to me it's a huge weight on my shoulders. Not only the physical items, but subscriptions to services, utilities, property taxes, home maintenance fees, etc. It's all extremely stressful and draining.

You're not alone, I feel the same way. I think it's the never-ending recurrence of these costs in both time and money that causes the anxiety. I took a break from work last fall and even though I have plenty of savings it wasn't hard to see how fast these recurring costs would drain them. At some point it all just feels like a yoke on your back.

Lately I've been dreaming about buying a sailboat and cruising without a fixed home address. I realize on a logical level that it isn't as glamorous as my fantasy of it but it calls to me nonetheless.