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Founder Depression

blog.samaltman.com

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Re: Founder Depression

#131

Post by Swizec »

nostrademons wrote: post #128
Swizec wrote: post #121

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As one of those achievers[1] I think it's even worse than you say. I have pretty much made peace with the fact that I am going to be fundamentally miserable for most if not all of my life. The reason why that is, is because even though I never do things just because others want me to do them[2], I am still very much driven by success and achievement. Not because society compels me to achieve, but because there is an…

I'm curious - could you reframe "following your gifts" as an opportunity instead of an obligation ? I also feel that same drive where I get restless when I feel my talents are being wasted. I think a lot of people do. But when my talents are actually being used, I don't feel miserable or unhappy, but rather content. I think this may be because I don't think in terms of "Am I accomplishing everything I set out to do?…

> But when my talents are actually being used, I don't feel miserable or unhappy, but rather content.

I think a large part of the problem for me personally is that I am simply getting bored. I need to find either new talents, or a new way to apply my talents. I've been following the same talents and passions for as long as I can remember. Started when I was 9-ish, still going strong 17 years later.

As you allude to, I need a better WHY than "because this is what I'm good at". Hell, very often even just a better WHY than "because I want(ed) to" would be great.

Re: Founder Depression

#132

Post by simonsarris »

niels_olson wrote: post #129
simonsarris wrote: post #122

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think you're spot on with your premise (not so sure about your conclusion), and I've certainly heard this sentiment before: "Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication, bullying, travel, meditation, medication, depression, neurosis and suicide. With failure comes failure." -Joseph Heller (author of Catch 22)

He's not spot on. Depression is depression. And the answer is to talk to somebody. That's actually the cold hard evidence-based answer. Talk. To somebody.

Sorry, I meant only with respect to his observation that depression is probably not limited in scope to mere failure, not with his proposed solution.

Re: Founder Depression

#133

Post by mjpizz »

shantanubala wrote: post #2

If anyone feels like they need someone to talk to, send me an email (in my profile). If you're in San Francisco, we can also get coffee.

same offer, Palo Alto or SF (email in my profile). Happy to listen over coffee, a meal, or breath of fresh air on a hike.

Re: Founder Depression

#134

Post by nostrademons »

Swizec wrote: post #131
nostrademons wrote: post #128

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm curious - could you reframe "following your gifts" as an opportunity instead of an obligation ? I also feel that same drive where I get restless when I feel my talents are being wasted. I think a lot of people do. But when my talents are actually being used, I don't feel miserable or unhappy, but rather content. I think this may be because I don't think in terms of "Am I accomplishing everything I set out to do?…

> But when my talents are actually being used, I don't feel miserable or unhappy, but rather content. I think a large part of the problem for me personally is that I am simply getting bored. I need to find either new talents, or a new way to apply my talents. I've been following the same talents and passions for as long as I can remember. Started when I was 9-ish, still going strong 17 years later. As you allude to,…

There's nothing wrong with "Because I wanted to" as a WHY.

Re: Founder Depression

#135

Post by bharath28 »

shantanubala wrote: post #2

If anyone feels like they need someone to talk to, send me an email (in my profile). If you're in San Francisco, we can also get coffee.

Everyone on this thread - you are amazing - bless you for offering to talk to people who need a sympathetic ear.

Re: Founder Depression

#136

Post by arnonejoe »

Dear Sam,

It's interesting to hear you speak about founder depression as you sit on top of the world.

Our team, openhospital.com, interviewed at YCombinator 6 weeks ago for the current batch and we failed (rejection email below). The $1100 interview reimbursement we received from YC only covered 1/3 of the cost of the trip and the time/energy spent applying could have been time and money spent coding and developing our product (and paying rent).

In the last 7 months I've managed to burn through my 401k from years software engineering jobs in pursuit building a cash medicine marketplace. I barely have enough money to pay my rent next month. In a desperate attempt to find capital, I also charged a trip to San Jose on my credit card 2 weeks ago to knock on doors up and down Sand Hill Road.

If you or anyone on this forum is interested in starting a cash medicine marketplace there is an opportunity to change the world and this needs to be done. Ironically my wife has horrible stomach problems and I spent two hours calling GI/colonoscopy doctors trying to find a cash price as I will be charging this on my credit cards as well.

I am desperate to start this and I don't care if I end up with 1/10000th of founder ownership at the end. We have a working provider site with several providers (18k lines of code). The other engineer on my team is smart (Stanford educated) and an awesome co-founder to work with.

Am I depressed? Yes. Am I giving up? Never.

My contact info is joe (at) openhospital.com if you Sam or anyone on this forum would like to chat.

Joe Arnone Founder OpenHospital.com

https://www.dropbox.com/s/d0jz58wmd8ynsup/Photo%20Apr%2026%2...

Re: Founder Depression

#137

Post by zeeshanm »

Lots of interesting comments here. I'll put some thoughts here, too... I have always thought there are two kinds of people in this world. One who do things that make other people's life better. Others who reap benefits of things done by the former group. To me the question is about whether you want to be selfless in the service of others or live a steady life. Once you have figured out, there is no shame in failing if your goals are high and intentions are right. If you base your success based on how people perceive you that is a very wrong way to think. The only reason because public opinion tends to change very so often. So, for me at least, being successful implies reaching for a bigger goal than the self. Being principled and finding happiness in doing the right thing. Just imagine if Nelson Mandela, Gandhi, Dr King, etc would have only thought for themselves what kind of a messed up world we all would have been living in? With greater goals come even greater challenges in some shape or form of "failures." "If There Is No Struggle, There Is No Progress”

Re: Founder Depression

#139

Post by Swizec »

nostrademons wrote: post #134
Swizec wrote: post #131

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> But when my talents are actually being used, I don't feel miserable or unhappy, but rather content. I think a large part of the problem for me personally is that I am simply getting bored. I need to find either new talents, or a new way to apply my talents. I've been following the same talents and passions for as long as I can remember. Started when I was 9-ish, still going strong 17 years later. As you allude to,…

There's nothing wrong with "Because I wanted to" as a WHY.

There's nothing wrong with it. It's perfectly valid. But there is something strangely crushing in the freedom to always do exactly (and only) what you want. I can't really explain it.

Re: Founder Depression

#140

Post by kirillzubovsky »

logicallee wrote: post #55

You can't afford to follow this advice. Saying you're crushing it is part of your 24/7 job description. There is a story of the founder who had just put a round together with a VC. Then, privately, the founder confided to a mutual friend, over dinner, about some of the difficulties. Result? The friend told the VC, the VC pulled out, and cited this conversation, saying that it was because his mutual friend said the co…

Stories like that exists, true, but so what? The moral of your story is not that one shouldn't talk to friends about their actual situation, but rather that some VCs are not the best people. Also, surround yourself with smarter friends.
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