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The 10 commandments for happiness and success

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Re: The 10 commandments for happiness and success

#41
post #39
post #36

I will share my two cents, how I overcome my depression. It sounds deadly simple, and it sort of is. 1) regular excercise. Make some small, daily routine (I prefer running) and stick to it. The endorphines work wonders. The body starts feeling good after a few days. 2) (and this will be maybe controversial due to The religious undertones) regular meditation. While excercise clears your body, meditation clears your mi…

I really don't get the anti-religion sentiment here. If you find in religious teachings a way to live happily, productively, in a socially positive way, why is that a problem or anything to apologize for?

Because this is HN and we're all expected to apologize for being anything but categorically dismissive of religion.

Re: The 10 commandments for happiness and success

#42
post #39
post #36

I will share my two cents, how I overcome my depression. It sounds deadly simple, and it sort of is. 1) regular excercise. Make some small, daily routine (I prefer running) and stick to it. The endorphines work wonders. The body starts feeling good after a few days. 2) (and this will be maybe controversial due to The religious undertones) regular meditation. While excercise clears your body, meditation clears your mi…

I really don't get the anti-religion sentiment here. If you find in religious teachings a way to live happily, productively, in a socially positive way, why is that a problem or anything to apologize for?

As a person who is still kind of atheistic, I can understand that sentiment.

Basically, scientific thinking forces constant verification of everything and encourages questioning, while religious thinking (even with buddhism) has far more dogmas and forces acceptance and, to a certain degree, discourages questioning.

What drove me to zen-buddhism is the fact that the religious part is kept rather small and it is far more focused on daily practice.

Re: The 10 commandments for happiness and success

#43
post #35

I enjoyed the post but there is one sentence I can't understand: > 2/ Only surround yourself with brilliant and positive people. Negative and mediocre people are everywhere and their influence on you can be devastating. The thing is that I'm potentially one of those "mediocre" people and I don't see why my influence should be devastating. For instance, what is wrong about being negative? Not that my days are about it…

This may be based on Law 10 of the 48 Laws of Power. "You can die from someone else’s misery. Emotional states are as infectious as diseases. You may feel you are helping the drowning man but you are only precipitating your own disaster. The unfortunate sometimes draw misfortune on themselves; they will also draw it on you. Associate with the happy and fortunate instead." – Robert Greene / 48 Laws of Power http://cgt…

I thought the same thing. Great read.

Re: The 10 commandments for happiness and success

#44
post #39

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I really don't get the anti-religion sentiment here. If you find in religious teachings a way to live happily, productively, in a socially positive way, why is that a problem or anything to apologize for?

Because this is HN and we're all expected to apologize for being anything but categorically dismissive of religion.

I have one place, just one, where being a nonbeliever doesn't make me feel like a deviant distrusted outsider.

I don't approve of disrespectful dismissals, but I understand why some people are seduced by it.

Re: The 10 commandments for happiness and success

#45
Eh.

1) We're social creatures -- we will inherently derive feelings of success from certain comparisons with others. Why should I forcefully negate this natural channel for happiness?

2) Only surround yourself with brilliant people. Negative people can be great.

3) Don’t be afraid to fail. Failing is not the best thing that could happen to you.

4) Find your vocation and have pleasure doing it (if vocations are you thing).

5) +1

6) +1

7) +1

8) +1

9) +1

10) Eh.

Re: The 10 commandments for happiness and success

#46
post #39
post #36

I will share my two cents, how I overcome my depression. It sounds deadly simple, and it sort of is. 1) regular excercise. Make some small, daily routine (I prefer running) and stick to it. The endorphines work wonders. The body starts feeling good after a few days. 2) (and this will be maybe controversial due to The religious undertones) regular meditation. While excercise clears your body, meditation clears your mi…

I really don't get the anti-religion sentiment here. If you find in religious teachings a way to live happily, productively, in a socially positive way, why is that a problem or anything to apologize for?

Indeed, religion makes you happier[1], so its strange the author left it out of his ten points

""[9] and a review of 498 studies published in peer-reviewed journals concluded that a large majority of them showed a positive correlation between religious commitment and higher levels of perceived well-being and self-esteem and lower levels of hypertension, depression, and clinical delinquency.[12] A meta-analysis of 34 recent studies published between 1990 and 2001 found that religiosity has a salutary relationship with psychological adjustment, being related to less psychological distress, more life satisfaction, and better self-actualization.[13] Finally, a recent systematic review of 850 research papers on the topic concluded that "the majority of well-conducted studies found that higher levels of religious involvement are positively associated with indicators of psychological well-being (life satisfaction, happiness, positive affect, and higher morale) and with less depression, suicidal thoughts and behavior, drug/alcohol use/abuse."[14]"

[1] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion_and_happiness

Re: The 10 commandments for happiness and success

#47

Does anyone know of any good meta-analyses of studies about happiness / life satisfaction? Or put another way: what does actual research suggest the "commandments" for happiness are?

Martin Seligman is one of the father's of positive psychology (the study of happiness). He has several popular books.

Re: The 10 commandments for happiness and success

#48
post #32

2/ Only surround yourself with brilliant and positive people. I partly agree with this rule. People who are negative drama-creators who regularly make bad decisions can really drag you down. They can cause you to spend an excessive amount of time worrying about pointless problems that only exist because of someone else's immaturity. But I'm also a teacher. I work with at-risk children who are immature and sometimes m…

I was hoping that you were going to critique the need to surround yourself with "positive people". There's obviously a lot to be said for not surrounding yourself with pessimists, but (in the US, anyway, and silicon valley, in particular), the default personality type tends to be "optimism to the point of delusion". It's just as problematic to overdose on positive thinking as it is being surrounded by pessimists. Opt…

I could not disagree more readily.

Note: I don't live in silicon valley.

We're talking about a nation of people who, by far, believe they are stuck with the life they were given, with no means of control. Sure, they hope that one day they'll be able to achieve their dreams and desires, but by far, the majority of the country(outside of Silicon Valley) has the opinion that the only way to live, is to slave it out for someone else doing something you don't like. Hell, you hear half as much in comedy routines, frequently(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ph9I-qPQ6FU, and I've heard several others make the same comment, including Chris Rock, Louis CK, and Ricky Gervais).

But the attitude silicon valley seems to foster in people- that if you work hard at something you believe in, you have a chance at being successful in ways you never could have dreamed? That's the only way an economy is going to work in the future. That's the only way when the majority of manual labor jobs can be eliminated by automation. Being able to teach, develop, and put yourself to good use in something you're proud of is gonna be the only way we've got left.

Pessimism isn't worth shit, and we've got too much of it in the US. At least with optimism, people try things. Sure, their dreams of success might be delusional- but they still have value, in that they'll try, and in trying, better themselves. The other option is that they just keep living a life of misery or mediocrity, and that way leads only madness.

Re: The 10 commandments for happiness and success

#49
post #34
post #21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That list contains a lot of good advice. However, I did pause at: 3) Money isn’t going to make you much happier. It might make you unhappier. It's true that above a certain point, money doesn't correlate much with happiness. People are terrible at affective forecasting, so most rich people don't spend their money on things that will make them happy. If you are wealthy, see the paper "If money doesn't make you happy,…

This is a great read, much more interesting than the original article. Thanks for the link.

I definitely concur.

Here's another life story that has resonated with me - http://www.alvinlaw.com/

I always think being grateful for what you have is a major ingredient for happiness. Alvin's story really made me reflect on all the good things in my life.

Re: The 10 commandments for happiness and success

#50
post #39
post #36

I will share my two cents, how I overcome my depression. It sounds deadly simple, and it sort of is. 1) regular excercise. Make some small, daily routine (I prefer running) and stick to it. The endorphines work wonders. The body starts feeling good after a few days. 2) (and this will be maybe controversial due to The religious undertones) regular meditation. While excercise clears your body, meditation clears your mi…

I really don't get the anti-religion sentiment here. If you find in religious teachings a way to live happily, productively, in a socially positive way, why is that a problem or anything to apologize for?

Because those same set of teachings often differ very slightly from someone else's and usually ends in a war, or at the very least, a great deal of wasted bloodshed. See history for examples.

Why you're supposed to apologize is because your religion - no matter which particular mythology you subscribe to, has likely caused an immeasurable amount of sorrow for many others.

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