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What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

theatlantic.com

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Re: What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

#51

Post by asmithmd1 »

arethuza wrote: post #43
jakejake wrote: post #32

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I feel exactly the same way. Nothing makes me happier than to hire a skilled tradesman and see the great results when the work done. His work is going to be much better than mine, assuming I could even do it. I don't really understand why any guy would be threatened by this. I think of it as working smarter, not harder.

That's pretty much my view - I haven't done any "serious" DIY for years once I found out that a really good tradesman will be much faster, much better quality and often not even that expensive. Of course, the trick is finding the good tradesmen.

It is kind of depressing to consider,but your wages have been going up by 5%-8% a year and the tradesmen's wages have been flat to to down. I have a great, problem solving carpenter who charges $25 per hour - a whole day of his work for $200. There is no way I can compete with that. The trouble is he is pretty busy and hard to get a hold of. I tell him every time he is at my house he should raise his rates and mark-up the cost of the materials he buys

Re: What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

#52

Post by jgj »

mvc wrote: post #16
InclinedPlane wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The richest people I know personally are all incredibly hard workers with rather wide-ranging skillsets and certainly a willingness to try new things. But that's just anecdotal so take it with a grain of salt.

I think what we've learned here is that the only thing rich people have in common is that they all have a lot of money.

As a rich person with very little money I am offended ;)

Re: What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

#53

Post by kaens »

InclinedPlane wrote: post #13
DuskStar wrote: post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Or that the rich folk might have gotten that way through being "more willing to learn it, try it, and logic out the problem."

The richest people I know personally are all incredibly hard workers with rather wide-ranging skillsets and certainly a willingness to try new things. But that's just anecdotal so take it with a grain of salt.

I find that to be true of the poorest people I know as well. Which is way-below-the-poverty-line poor.

Re: What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

#54

Post by wr1472 »

rayiner wrote: post #27

> Although I've worked for plenty of men who seem to be perfectly comfortable with the arrangement of using the money they earn with their own skills to pay for someone else's expertise, there are three reactions I've grown familiar with that suggest there's often anxiety about letting another guy do your "man jobs." I grew up here in the U.S., but I still find Westerners weird sometimes. My dad grew up in a village…

Which village in Bangladesh out of interest?

Re: What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

#55

Post by bluedino »

saraid216 wrote: post #30
dizzystar wrote: post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've seen this played out so many times, it is quite sickening. I generally found that union folk can't pound themselves out of a paper bag. At the risk of sounding inflammatory, many home owners want everything cheap as humanly possible, so they find people willing to do it for below minimum wage (immigrants) and buy the cheapest, warped material they can find at Home Depot. Sometimes spending a little extra money f…

I know nothing about plumbing. So when my kitchen sink went haywire, I called a plumber. He installed a new waste disposal for me and, according to the Internet price listings for the exact model he put in, overcharged me by about $250. When I implied I knew what was going on, he explained it was for warranties, which... seemed implausible unless he was getting stiffed himself. I decided not to take him to task for i…

Does the computer repair guy charge you NewEgg prices to replace a part in your desktop?

Re: What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

#56

Post by ams6110 »

saraid216 wrote: post #30
dizzystar wrote: post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've seen this played out so many times, it is quite sickening. I generally found that union folk can't pound themselves out of a paper bag. At the risk of sounding inflammatory, many home owners want everything cheap as humanly possible, so they find people willing to do it for below minimum wage (immigrants) and buy the cheapest, warped material they can find at Home Depot. Sometimes spending a little extra money f…

I know nothing about plumbing. So when my kitchen sink went haywire, I called a plumber. He installed a new waste disposal for me and, according to the Internet price listings for the exact model he put in, overcharged me by about $250. When I implied I knew what was going on, he explained it was for warranties, which... seemed implausible unless he was getting stiffed himself. I decided not to take him to task for i…

Parts and supplies (whether for plumbing, auto repairs, etc.) are always marked up about double what you would pay retail yourself. You can buy a water pump for a Chevy Impala for about $50 online. A competent shop will most likely charge you $100 or more, plus labor to install it, but they know it's the right one, they know what other gaskets, seals, etc. they need to replace along with it, they have the tools and knowledge to install it properly, and they will warranty the job and the part against defects for some period of time. That's what you're paying for when you pay a shop or a professional to do something for you.

If you want to take that on yourself (and it's not really difficult, fundamentally) you can save that markup and the shop's labor charges. I used to do this a lot more than I do now, because even though I enjoy working with tools and fixing mechanical things, when I compare spending 3 hours replacing a water pump on my car to the opportunity cost I very often decide its not worth it (this has changed as I have grown older and my free time has become more valuable to me).

Re: What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

#57

Post by bluedino »

dpeck wrote: post #17
InclinedPlane wrote: post #10

I took AP classes in college, and I work in the software industry, but I still know how to work with my hands and I'm very happy to have that knowledge. It's not that hard, if you feel bad about not knowing anything, go learn, go take a class or two, go read a book or two, go ask a friend, or use the internet, there are a million excellent resources out there. Pick a simple project and do it, then do another project.…

" Stocking a basic toolbox is extraordinarily inexpensive, there's really no reason not to have one." This is great advice, anyone reading who doesn't have at least the basics please get them. I have a few friends who I help out on occasion and it is incredibly frustrating to not have the basic tools available. Decent screwdriver set Socket set Hammer Electrical Pliers Multimeter Pliers Adjustable Wrench Just these b…

> I have a few friends who I help out on occasion and it is incredibly frustrating to not have the basic tools available.

A younger guy at work asked if he could borrow one of the screwdrivers I keep in my desk. I thought maybe he was going to pop open his computer, he said he was going to put a bed together. At his apartment.

He didn't even own a screwdriver. C'mon. I sarcastically asked him, "You're a manly man, aren't you?", then handed him a large phillips screwdriver.

Another guy in the office overheard the conversation and laughed about it with me, and then we went down to Harbor Freight and bought him a $7 screwdriver set.

Re: What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

#58

Post by bluedino »

trhtrsh wrote: post #23
ameister14 wrote: post #12

Until I went to college I didn't realize not everyone learned wood and metalworking in school. Industrial Arts, it was called. We learned to make jewelry, forge with iron, etc. Then in high school I did woodworking instead, and made furniture, which most of us sold as a side job. I just thought that was totally normal. I'm still not sure why it isn't.

Budget cuts. You can't write a standardized test for woodworking, so schools stopped teaching it.

What ever happened to learning this stuff from good ol' dad, or your grandfather?

I was lucky enough to have a step-father who was fairly handy, had a large amount of tools, and my mother always had him working on a project around the house. Building a deck, remodeling the kitchen, that kind of stuff. I hated being dragged away from friends and video games to help him out with random stuff but I learned quite a bit.

I also had the fortune of learning from my birth father on how NOT to do certain things. He'd always take shortcuts that ended up hurting the end result, which to this day I point out as we work on things.

Re: What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

#59

Post by mattdeboard »

shardling wrote: post #39
mattdeboard wrote: post #26

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The Atlantic was banned from reddit for spamming last year. Wouldn't surprise me if they were doing the same BS here.

Well, the submitter of this article has a 5 year old account. They frequently submit news articles from a variety of sources, and are also an active commenter. (Though, they do seem to like posting quotes.) The other two atlantic articles on the front page are from 2-3 year old accounts that likewise post a lot of pieces from various newspapers. You're welcome to dig through their posting history for a conspiracy, bu…

Doesn't have to be new accounts. "Pay to post" is a regular occurrence and a lucrative side business for people on high-traffic, user-curated content sites like Reddit and Digg.

Re: What Being a Handyman Has Taught Me About Male Insecurity

#60

Post by mattdeboard »

rrreese wrote: post #50
shardling wrote: post #39

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Well, the submitter of this article has a 5 year old account. They frequently submit news articles from a variety of sources, and are also an active commenter. (Though, they do seem to like posting quotes.) The other two atlantic articles on the front page are from 2-3 year old accounts that likewise post a lot of pieces from various newspapers. You're welcome to dig through their posting history for a conspiracy, bu…

I like the fact that you investigated this before posting rather then being "ra ra conspiracy" like the other posters.

It's not a conspiracy, it's a well-known and common business practice for content companies.
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