Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

wsj.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

151–160 of 203 posts

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#151

Post by mock-possum »

pi-e-sigma wrote: post #150
mock-possum wrote: post #149

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think you misread the comment you’re replying to - > he was very rational and threatened other children to play with him and treat him like a friend My emphasis. He’s not forcing people like him, because you’re right, you can’t force that, he’s coercing people into acting like they like him. The point is that since he (supposedly) can’t feel the feeling himself, or can’t understand it, all he has to go off of is wh…

No matter how you try to explain it, trying to force other kids to play with you is not a rational behavior. Rational behavior would be trying to find out why they don't want to play with you and try to do something about it. Would you say that if a girl doesn't want to date you then forcing her to date you is a rational behavior?

Personally? No. But if I was a kid who didn't understand that stuff? Totally.

I mean come on, there are plenty of adults who think that that's a perfectly rational approach to getting what they want.

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#152

Post by JohnBooty »

dirtybirdnj wrote: post #148
JohnBooty wrote: post #130

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The amount of undue hate that people on the spectrum get for being sociopaths or narcissist is awful. You are correct that they may misunderstand or "not get" social situations. You are incorrect in that they don't care / can't feel the emotion of a situation. Often they are overwhelmed by this and it's what makes "dealing" (passing as NT) difficult. I absolutely agree. When I said the parent's post sounded more like…

> When I said the parent's post sounded more like they were describing autism I have a feeling that the venn diagram between autism and the ASPD stuff is more than we realize. Same spectrum, just extreme dysfunction at polar ends. > I strictly meant the part about struggling to understand social dynamics. One thing that's been amazing for me (re: autism spectrum) is understanding the difference between "not seeing" t…

    I don't feel any respect for people in positions of 
    power who do not treat their subordinates
I'm not particularly on the autism spectrum (possibly on the shallow end) but I can absolutely assure you this is not an autism spectrum-specific trait.

Clearly, folks on the spectrum are going to tend to value different things than folks on the spectrum.

I'm not sure if you are venturing into "normies are sheeple, but us aspies think for ourselves!" territory but if so, I would tell you that you are wrong in the strongest possible terms.

    Why would [a person with ASPD] person ever change?
Because there are a lot of downsides to constantly clashing with society, and a lot of upsides to living harmoniously/synergistically with society. If your neighbors don't loathe you, you can probably ask them to feed your cat while you're on vacation.

I mean, on a micro scale, yeah. If a person with ASPD feels no guilt whatsoever, obviously they can maximize personal gain from every interaction.

But things like reputation matter. If a person with ASPD has a reputation of exploiting and cheating everybody they interact with, people will avoid them. They can constantly seek out new people, and some do, but that is "expensive" in terms of time and effort and not necessarily going to be worth it to a lot of individuals even from a purely objective, amoral perspective.

It's tangential, but, on the macro scale. A lot of people are liberal/progressive for reasons of empathy, or at least that is the stereotype -- ie, the "bleeding heart liberal." I think that's true to an extent but I also think there are a lot of purely selfish and amoral reasons to favor a more collective approach to society. I think that even if you surgically removed my ability to empathize with others I'd still be super liberal.

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#153

Post by pi-e-sigma »

mock-possum wrote: post #151
pi-e-sigma wrote: post #150

Earlier quoted context omitted.

No matter how you try to explain it, trying to force other kids to play with you is not a rational behavior. Rational behavior would be trying to find out why they don't want to play with you and try to do something about it. Would you say that if a girl doesn't want to date you then forcing her to date you is a rational behavior?

Personally? No. But if I was a kid who didn't understand that stuff? Totally. I mean come on, there are plenty of adults who think that that's a perfectly rational approach to getting what they want.

You wouldn't force a girl to date you because you know it's not rational. You wouldn't force kids to play with you because it's not rational either. Simple as that. Just because somebody thinks it is actually rational doesn't make it so. The kid wasn't rational at all, if anything his behavior was completely irrational

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#155

Post by pnutjam »

Spooky23 wrote: post #90
pi-e-sigma wrote: post #63

Earlier quoted context omitted.

How could he be 'very rational' and also 'threaten people to become his friends'?

People who don't feel want to have what they observe, but don't understand it. So they develop their own reasons. Normal people get an emotional reward from human contact. Something similar is common in victims of trauma as well. The trope is the woman with "daddy issues", which are more complex, who try to fill a void they have with sexual relationships. Instead of seeking an absent male relationship, they manipulat…

Bingo, you can't be "rational" when you don't understand any of the existing rational reasons people do things.

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#156

Post by jdmn73 »

AndrewKemendo wrote: post #121
h2odragon wrote: post #115

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And if it is my life ? I've got a lonely mountain in the woods, way out with few neighbors. me and my hounds can hunt and not bother nobody. I find it difficult for numerous reasons to interact with people in social situations, not least being that people smell tasty . My awareness of this fact is something that people pick up on. it snowballs. It'd be nice if I could contribute to society but there's not that many w…

Fully embracing of one’s truest self is arguably enlightenment

Maybe don't encourage the person that says people smell tasty to do that

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#157

Post by jstarfish »

pi-e-sigma wrote: post #150
mock-possum wrote: post #149

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think you misread the comment you’re replying to - > he was very rational and threatened other children to play with him and treat him like a friend My emphasis. He’s not forcing people like him, because you’re right, you can’t force that, he’s coercing people into acting like they like him. The point is that since he (supposedly) can’t feel the feeling himself, or can’t understand it, all he has to go off of is wh…

No matter how you try to explain it, trying to force other kids to play with you is not a rational behavior. Rational behavior would be trying to find out why they don't want to play with you and try to do something about it. Would you say that if a girl doesn't want to date you then forcing her to date you is a rational behavior?

[dead]

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#158

Post by RecycledEle »

n4r9 wrote: post #140
Benlights wrote: post #137

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Her about page on https://patricgagne.com/ says this > B.A. · University of California Los Angeles > M.A. · California Graduate Institute > PhD · California Graduate Institute of The Chicago School of Professional Psychology

It might be pedantic but according to Wikipedia the CGI awards a PsyD rather than a PhD: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/California_Graduate_Institute This Wiki page has a little more about the differences between the two: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doctor_of_Psychology It seems like the PsyD has more emphasis on clinical practise and (one supposes) less on theoretical research.

Schools may usually issue one, but sometimes issue the other.

Schools also sometimes change which they issue.

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#159

Post by thephyber »

pwthornton wrote: post #144
gosub100 wrote: post #95

Earlier quoted context omitted.

He's hurting all the other players who do not dope, and hurting the sport in general by creating an incentive for most people to dope, tarnishing the reputation.

He doped because extreme endurance events pretty much demand doping.

Wrong. His doping and his coordination of doping across his team pushed other teams to dope to compete with his team. There was no obvious suspicion of doping prior to his team and that is clear that Lance and his team were performing far above the level of the other teams in his early doping days.

Your statement is only true after the doping snowball exists within many teams of that sport. If the athletes didn’t lie or if they were caught in a reasonable amount of time, then there is no need for doping.

I’m guessing you are making unstated assumptions because of your wording when you say “pretty much demand”. Are there any non-obvious assumptions that might be interesting to discuss?

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#160

Post by shrimp_emoji »

kayodelycaon wrote: post #28
qumpis wrote: post #2

Fascinating article. I wonder what made her do the steps in finding what's "different" with her, and most of all, why the need to fix it arose. Is it to "fit in", understandably? It somehow felt alien to me, and this shows my ignorance on the topic, that people lacking in empathy department would attempt to understand the reasons and act "good" towards others even if this feeling is only understood intellectually.

I think it’s easy enough to explain. I’m asexual and don’t feel sexual attraction. In fact I’m completely blind to it. I definitely noticed something was wrong with me once I started school. Since then, I am constantly reminded of that by everyone around me. They have something I’m expected to have. Just imagine if you were the weird one because you were the only person with emotions. You can’t escape it. You can’t f…

On the flip side, the vast majority of people can't make up a username as cool as yours.
Post reply on HN