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I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

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Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#131

Post by JohnBooty »

em-bee wrote: post #51
JohnBooty wrote: post #31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I definitely noticed something was wrong with me once I started school I hope you have gotten, or will get to, a place where you no longer think of this as something "wrong" with you!

that's very difficult when you have a trait that others can't see, and therefore can't be aware of or understand, and much less empathize with. it feels wrong because you keep getting confronted with expectations that you can't fulfill. and you can't see others that have the same experience. so you end up feeling you are the only one.

I hope you can find your tribe, so to speak. My best friend is ace and has a large and supportive ace friend group. It is not a cure-all but it sure goes a long way....

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#132

Post by mbivert »

BLKNSLVR wrote: post #109
coldtea wrote: post #87

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I can imagine all the birds in the dinosaur times felt wrong because they weren't t-rexes. Well, that's what saved them in the end It's not about birds in dinosaur times though - as an analogy I mean. It's more about a particular bird being different from others of its species of bird. This could be an advantage to their life and acceptance (e.g. they might be too pretty or stronger) or usually a big detriment to t…

Additionally, being asexual is 'wrong' in a life / procreation sense. It's a kind of dead-end personality trait. (I'm specifically not saying 'wrong' for existing in society or having value to offer the world and, actually, if environmental factors make a difference to this sort of thing, then asexuality could well be increasingly common as a response to the state of the world vis-a-vis climate change and resource us…

> Additionally, being asexual is 'wrong' in a life / procreation sense. It's a kind of dead-end personality trait.

I think that's a bit too reductive: asexuality ≠ not having kids. Even people who dislike the dentist won't mind going if it benefits them.

However, there might indeed be an issue in finding a properly fitting other half, but it seems[0] that the trait is not that uncommon either (order of magnitude seems to be about 1%).

[0]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asexuality#Prevalence

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#133

Post by [deleted] »

JohnBooty wrote: post #130
dirtybirdnj wrote: post #108

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Wow, that doesn't jive with my personal experiences or what I've ever read about sociopathy. It sounds more like you're describing folks on the autism spectrum. The amount of undue hate that people on the spectrum get for being sociopaths or narcissist is awful. You are correct that they may misunderstand or "not get" social situations. You are incorrect in that they don't care / can't feel the emotion of a situati…

The amount of undue hate that people on the spectrum get for being sociopaths or narcissist is awful. You are correct that they may misunderstand or "not get" social situations. You are incorrect in that they don't care / can't feel the emotion of a situation. Often they are overwhelmed by this and it's what makes "dealing" (passing as NT) difficult. I absolutely agree. When I said the parent's post sounded more like…

[deleted]

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#134

Post by haswell »

AndrewKemendo wrote: post #117
haswell wrote: post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> This isn’t a disability, sociopathy is a self-propelled toxic character trait, typically resulting from deep childhood trauma that our society rewards structurally I don’t understand the point you’re trying to make here. If this is a result of deep childhood trauma, in what way is it self propelled? > Mostly we just need to identify and isolate people with ASPD as quickly as possible. This seems pretty horrific to…

I’d make a strong argument that the vast majority of the world’s ills are a result of narcissists being in charge of most of the organizations worldwide You seem to have in mind some poor beaten down person struggling to survive Instead these are the people I’m talking about: https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/2023/09/13/tim-gurner-u... Basically every banker, vc, public company CEO, dictatorial district manager, s…

Clearly there are people who cause harm. That is not what I'm reacting to.

I'm pushing against the ideas that:

1. This is somehow "self-directed" (which again makes no sense in the context of acknowledging childhood trauma)

2. Every manifestation of this trait leads to great harm (leaving no room for a spectrum or treatment/management)

3. We should "identify and isolate" people with this trait

What does 3 even entail in your mind? How would this play out practically speaking?

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#135

Post by helboi4 »

bombcar wrote: post #123
toomuchtodo wrote: post #113

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Might be a sociopath, look into it. Seriously though, this ignores that sometimes, being of age of consent ("an adult") does not mean there is a free will choice available. Edit: @bombcar Stealing that, thank you!

The idea that consent is both necessary AND sufficient needs to be laid to rest. Consent may be necessary (there can be discussions when and where it is necessary and what that means, for example "consenting" to taxes, etc) but it is not sufficient in all cases.

Yeah its a bit of dangerous idea to act like its okay to do anything to people if they ostensibly "consent".

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#136

Post by helboi4 »

jokethrowaway wrote: post #105

This doesn't sound like the conventional definition of sociopathy (you still have empathy but act against it, feel guilty) but psychopathy (innate, lack of empathy) First, I've heard about these unstoppable "impulses", it's more about being less risk averse, not caring about damage done to others, thinking you'll get through it successfully.

I think there is actually no clear definition of the difference between sociopathy and psychopathy that is agreed on

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#137

Post by Benlights »

wtfwhateven wrote: post #73

https://old.reddit.com/r/askpsychology/comments/jqewhk/does_... this person is lying, she doesn't have a PhD, she's using someone else's name

Her about page on https://patricgagne.com/ says this

> B.A. · University of California Los Angeles

> M.A. · California Graduate Institute

> PhD · California Graduate Institute of The Chicago School of Professional Psychology

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#138

Post by kayodelycaon »

JohnBooty wrote: post #31
kayodelycaon wrote: post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think it’s easy enough to explain. I’m asexual and don’t feel sexual attraction. In fact I’m completely blind to it. I definitely noticed something was wrong with me once I started school. Since then, I am constantly reminded of that by everyone around me. They have something I’m expected to have. Just imagine if you were the weird one because you were the only person with emotions. You can’t escape it. You can’t f…

I definitely noticed something was wrong with me once I started school I hope you have gotten, or will get to, a place where you no longer think of this as something "wrong" with you!

I have. No need to worry about me. :)

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#139

Post by zen928 »

em-bee wrote: post #54
spiffytech wrote: post #29

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My wife is a therapist and says it's a very common reason people get into the field.

i think this is positive. because it means therapists can empathize when people feel that there is something wrong with them. there is nothing worse than a therapist who doesn't take your feelings seriously. also, when you do need therapy yourself, depending on what kind of therapist you get, you can end up spending a lot of time learning just for your own sake. my brother did that, and at some point he was able to e…

I don't want therapists to empathize and feel my emotions, I want them to sympathize and understand why I feel that way. You don't want doctors who have compromised their judgment by being in emotional states from self inflicted empathy when trying to treat people in a judgment free and rational way. Taking my feelings seriously as another input to the question of my mental state is different than feeling a personal empathetic connection with someone who is supposed to be their patient.

Re: I always knew I was different, I didn't know I was a sociopath

#140

Post by n4r9 »

Benlights wrote: post #137
wtfwhateven wrote: post #73

https://old.reddit.com/r/askpsychology/comments/jqewhk/does_... this person is lying, she doesn't have a PhD, she's using someone else's name

Her about page on https://patricgagne.com/ says this > B.A. · University of California Los Angeles > M.A. · California Graduate Institute > PhD · California Graduate Institute of The Chicago School of Professional Psychology

It might be pedantic but according to Wikipedia the CGI awards a PsyD rather than a PhD: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/California_Graduate_Institute

This Wiki page has a little more about the differences between the two: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doctor_of_Psychology

It seems like the PsyD has more emphasis on clinical practise and (one supposes) less on theoretical research.

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