Is it really that popular? I've never met a single polyamorous person in my entire life, they just seem very vocal on the internet.
Statistically, you've met many. So either they just didn't feel the need to bring it up, or they felt a specific need to avoid the subject in front of you.
How Did Polyamory Become So Popular?
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Re: How Did Polyamory Become So Popular?
#42It isn't. I don't know of a single couple in my personal life or extended group of friends that went poly and remained a couple past 5 years. They all eventually split up. Why get married if you're going to be polyamorous. Seems like a bit of a hassle to tie yourself up legally and financially when you've otherwise thrown all other parts of the relationship to the wind.
Re: How Did Polyamory Become So Popular?
#43Is it really that popular? I've never met a single polyamorous person in my entire life, they just seem very vocal on the internet.
Statistically, you've met many. So either they just didn't feel the need to bring it up, or they felt a specific need to avoid the subject in front of you.
Re: How Did Polyamory Become So Popular?
#44Is it really that popular? I've never met a single polyamorous person in my entire life, they just seem very vocal on the internet.
But folks may not mention it to you until you’re at a certain level of friendship. I remember a couple I knew who disclosed after a few months.
Re: How Did Polyamory Become So Popular?
#45I wonder how middle-aged couples deal with the sexual desires. Numerous reports, let alone anecdotes and shows, mentioned that couples with each other for many years lost sexual desire towards each other, while their libido still flowed free. To quote one of such publications: "Sexual arousal and desire appear to decrease in response to partner familiarity and increase in response to partner novelty". I guess it's a…
Re: How Did Polyamory Become So Popular?
#46Because the author got the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon.
The data suggests it truly is more popular. The Gallup poll below shows that the percent of people who find it "acceptable" has tripled since 2000. The generational data, which admittedly would be more useful if it was over time, still shows younger generations are more into it. https://news.gallup.com/opinion/polling-matters/313112/under... https://sexualalpha.com/polyamory-statistics/ What data or info do you have…
I oppose the "become" part because no, it wasn't HBO that changed this needle, it's religion.
Re: How Did Polyamory Become So Popular?
#47Earlier quoted context omitted.
Nah, we'll just use the existing spouse_id field in the records to set up a circular linked list through the polycule. A conventional two-person marriage is just a special case of that anyway.
Linked lists can only have two neighbours, a polycule can be arbitrarily complex. (Depending on the purpose for which the data is being used, it may even be directional — e.g. for STD tracking, it does actually matter if someone has a cuckoldry kink).
Re: How Did Polyamory Become So Popular?
#48If I felt secure in a relationship, having a partner that wants to experiment with others/date others wouldn’t really bother me. Everyone likes a little novelty from time to time.
If you felt secure in the relationship you probably wouldn't feel the need. The desire for novelty comes from bored or unfulfilled from your current relationship, which would contest the "security" of the relationship if it is impossible to live without it.
That I am clearly fulfilled with my existing diet doesn't stop me from trying new things on the menu, nor new restaurants with entirely new menus.
And the desire to try new things doesn't imply that the absence of them is "impossible to live without" — even back out of metaphor land and back to human sexuality, lot of gay people used to live straight lives.
Re: How Did Polyamory Become So Popular?
#49If I felt secure in a relationship, having a partner that wants to experiment with others/date others wouldn’t really bother me. Everyone likes a little novelty from time to time.
Of course, some people don’t seem to mind this much. Or maybe this fancy new Bay Area “polyamory” memeplex works really well. I find it hard to imagine any amount of coping strategies could dull the pain for me.
Re: How Did Polyamory Become So Popular?
#50Earlier quoted context omitted.
I don't think this anecdote nullifies the question. A thing being popular doesn't necessarily mean it is a successful approach.
The question is a lie at face value. Polyamory isn't popular at all. It's just not as much of a taboo as it used to be. There's a giant difference between "what would your opinion of someone be if they were in an open relationship" and "would YOU want an open relationship?" The first has nothing to do with you personally past your opinion of how you would relate to someone else.
But it's Christmas, and there is gin, so I hope I have your forgiveness.