161–170 of 194 posts
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Maybe, but there are many, many studies showing that on dating apps, it's 80% of the women choosing 20% of the men. Many women are also fairly ignorant about how unrealistic some standards (over 6' tall, makes over $100K/yr.) are.
I’m not that old but I also never did online dating. Is there a possibility that online dating has a bias for women that are “choosy” (for lack of a better term)?
Worse: online dating apps create choosy daters. It is less like "dating" and more like online shopping. People who use such apps are incentivized to drill down using increasingly-specific filters hoping to find the perfect mate, but in reality find themselves with no suitable matches at all. Worse yet, if they do find someone, the false sense of being able to continue refining toward a more perfect mate often drives them away from actually-existing relationships and back to the apps where they fruitlessly search for an "upgrade"
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Paradox_of_Choice
https://www.salecycle.com/blog/strategies/is-choice-paralysi...
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It sounds like some women (a, unfortunately larger percentage than I'd like) simply want to men to suffer. I doubt the men who get AI girlfriends were the men most women wanted to date anyways.
Framing it this way implies that men are owed attention from women and a lack thereof is punishment. When in reality women are people and nearly 100% of all people ever wish to not be harassed by a stranger that feels entitled to their time. Women want to be able to go about their daily business without some dude trying to talk to them because he thinks he deserves something
Women are naturally more selective than men, and rate partners differently than men. If I remember correctly, the preference of the average rated woman is to go for the top 20% or so of men. This causes those top 20% of men to have many partners, while the rest is left with below average prospects in terms of attractiveness.
Evolution selects for this. For the entirety of human evolution, it has been vastly more costly for women to reproduce than men (I don't even want to try to calculate how many children a man could produce in the 9 months it takes a woman to gestate one), so evolution rewards us for being as selective as we can get away with. Maybe the grass is always greener, but having to lower your standards to some slightly less a…
I don't know why people are focusing on what men will do with AI girlfriends - the actual question is what women will do with AI boyfriends. On every single AI chat app like character.ai the majority of users are women, and the most popular characters are men. Women are people who read romance novels and are even more attracted by the "emotional validation". > Now we’re facing a future where guys could get addicted t…
The swaths of romance novels bear this out
I've also read a number of books set in the Warhammer 40k IP and consider these similar fantasy except with a different mode of conflict resolution. If "Romance" is feminine by nature, I venture to consider the books in the Black Library to be "Masculine Romance", with an emphasis on getting what is desired through power over others rather than through power over oneself.
I don't know why people are focusing on what men will do with AI girlfriends - the actual question is what women will do with AI boyfriends. On every single AI chat app like character.ai the majority of users are women, and the most popular characters are men. Women are people who read romance novels and are even more attracted by the "emotional validation". > Now we’re facing a future where guys could get addicted t…
It's a combination of the Women-are-wonderful Effect [0] (which goes double when it comes to sexuality) and the universal lack of giving-a-shit about problems that men face. Men's sexuality is dangerous and unnecessary. Womens' sexuality is moral and precious. To say that womens' sexuality is causing a social problem is absolutely unacceptable in establishment cultural spaces. The other side of it is that nobody care…
However. I care about everyone's problems, especially those who are unfairly oppressed (rather than just feeling unfairly oppressed because they've lost a fraction of the excess power they once enjoyed). I wholeheartedly agree that we collectively need to consider how best to help men find a sense of purpose, even if it stings a little bit given all the harm we men have caused. It is not weakness to admit that, by the way. It feels weaker to ignore it, and to not champion dismantling the Patriarchy towards an equitable balance of power.
Patriarchy
noun pa· tri· ar· chy | \ ˈpā-trē-ˌär-kē \ plural pa tri ar chies
Definition 1 : social organization marked by the supremacy of the father in the clan or family, the legal dependence of wives and children, and the reckoning of descent and inheritance in the male line broadly : control by men of a disproportionately large share of power 2 : a society or institution organized according to the principles or practices of patriarchy //For 20 years the country was ruled as a patriarchy.
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I honestly have zero problem with people having "unrealistic" standards. You can restrict your own pool as much as you like, as long as you don't complain about not finding any partners. I (and people in general) have no right to be upset at not meeting what we see as "unrealistic" or "unimportant" standards held by people we are interested in. We are not entitled to a relationship. (I do think it's kind of sad when…
>I talked to a friend of mine who had a sense of attractiveness so strict that she literally could not find someone she found physically appealing within a hundred mile radius I found this tool to be very illuminating: https://igotstandardsbro.com/ (Please ignore the misogynistic verbiage)
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It sounds like some women (a, unfortunately larger percentage than I'd like) simply want to men to suffer. I doubt the men who get AI girlfriends were the men most women wanted to date anyways.
Framing it this way implies that men are owed attention from women and a lack thereof is punishment. When in reality women are people and nearly 100% of all people ever wish to not be harassed by a stranger that feels entitled to their time. Women want to be able to go about their daily business without some dude trying to talk to them because he thinks he deserves something
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Most of what he says is not real. "Men's sexuality is dangerous and unnecessary" - who is saying this? I understand powerful men abusing people is a hot topic right now, but male sexuality doesn't feel under attack to me. If you think of abuse and manipulation as male sexuality, I suppose I could see it. "The other side of it is that nobody cares about mens' problems" People do care. You can talk to them and share if…
> "Men's sexuality is dangerous and unnecessary" - who is saying this? I just took the literal string used by the commenter—"Men's sexuality is dangerous and unnecessary"—and did a Google search with it. What comes up is a mix of pages where people say something to this effect, or else argue against it. My takeaway is that at the very least, it's something that's being said enough to require arguing against.