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Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

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Re: Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

#131

Post by com »

zo1 wrote: post #123
jacquesm wrote: post #54

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is one thing that always got me about the United States: people will ask you how you are doing, but they don't actually mean it, it's just a required pre-amble, a bit like the tones a modem uses to sync up with the other end. If he did it in a way that he actually genuinely wanted to know the answer that alone would set him apart in a very distinctive way. Most people really don't want to know the answer, but th…

The entire world probably has the equivalent of "how are you" in every which language available. Not sure where you're going with this "take" on American culture.

Some cultures ask “have you eaten?” and I like that. A lot.

Re: Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

#132

Post by hutzlibu »

klipt wrote: post #124
hutzlibu wrote: post #62

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"Loners are probably much more likely to die of say, having a heart attack and not receiving help promptly." On the other hand, loners won't get a heart attack caused by other people ..

"People who experienced social isolation had a 32% higher risk of dying early from any cause compared with those who weren't socially isolated." https://amp.cnn.com/cnn/2023/06/19/health/loneliness-social-...

Oh for sure.

I guess except for rare exceptions, allmost no one really wants to be alone by default. But I know that I am rather alone, than in bad company.. and I met quite some people, who lived in misery, because they were too scared of being on their own for some time.

Re: Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

#133

Post by necovek »

jacquesm wrote: post #54
smohnot wrote: post #35

Mr. Rogers was my actual neighbor in Pittsburgh in 1999-2000, while I was at CMU. He would really go out of his way to have social interactions. He would always say hello and ask how you were doing in a way that felt like he actually genuinely wanted to know the answer. Case of the person in real life being exactly like what he seems like on TV.

This is one thing that always got me about the United States: people will ask you how you are doing, but they don't actually mean it, it's just a required pre-amble, a bit like the tones a modem uses to sync up with the other end. If he did it in a way that he actually genuinely wanted to know the answer that alone would set him apart in a very distinctive way. Most people really don't want to know the answer, but th…

My English lessons from when I was a kid 30+ years ago spring to mind too: "how do you do?"

Still, other languages do that too: que tal (Spanish), šta ima (Serbian), wie gehts (German),...

Re: Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

#134

Post by ethanbond »

xeromal wrote: post #37
ethanbond wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

In the US most people in suburbs only ever walk from their door to their car (which is itself often inside the garage) and then they sit in their steel and glass box to the minimal possible distance from their desk, then do the reverse on the way home.

Idk. I live in a suburb and my little neighborhood is pretty friendly to the point where someone can post to our private Facebook group and ask someone to hold a package or to check out their house while they're on vacation. Really depends on what kind of community you have

What I'm describing is unrelated to friendliness. Our built environment is the number one determinant of encounters with our neighbors. You can be perfectly friendly with people who you rarely see and could never make a routine of greeting (because you rarely see them without prior planning).

Re: Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

#135

Post by datavirtue »

wing-_-nuts wrote: post #34
barbazoo wrote: post #29

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Do those "neighborhoods" even have sidewalks then?

Not usually, or if they do, they're merely 'decorative' in that they're not a viable option for pedestrians to get from A to B. They just end without signals or crosswalks. Someone in a wheelchair would literally have to drive in the street in many areas of the south.

they end the sidewalk a good poke from the brown neighborhoods

Re: Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

#136

Post by lotsofpulp »

jacquesm wrote: post #127
gattilorenz wrote: post #126

Earlier quoted context omitted.

“Graag gedaan” (“you’re welcome”, “my pleasure”, but more lit. “I did it with pleasure”) can be dropped quite casually, right?

Yes, but it actually does have meaning, and it is appreciated for that meaning rather than ignored. Conversely:Americans probably think I'm rude because I don't first ask them how they are but start the actual conversation without pre-amble.

I would find it normal if you started a conversation after a simple “hi” or “hello”, and I think many other Americans would agree.

Re: Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

#137

Post by AlbertCory »

the_only_law wrote: post #113
AlbertCory wrote: post #96

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The problem there is no problem. It's a friendly greeting. Sorry your life is such a bummer. Try saying, "Great, and you?" even if you don't mean it at all. You get back what you give out. Edit: you can also say, "Shitty. It sucks to be me." That might even be honest, judging from the responses.

> Try saying, "Great, and you?" even if you don't mean it at all. Nothing I hate more than a liar.

Try going without lying for a week. I think there are even movies about that.

Re: Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

#138

Post by jacquesm »

com wrote: post #131
zo1 wrote: post #123

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The entire world probably has the equivalent of "how are you" in every which language available. Not sure where you're going with this "take" on American culture.

Some cultures ask “have you eaten?” and I like that. A lot.

Yes, I've heard 'have you had rice today?' and that gave me a similar feeling. It inquires about health, hunger, affluence and is an open invitation to share some food all at once.

Re: Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

#139

Post by fknorangesite »

AlbertCory wrote: post #128
jacquesm wrote: post #115

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Forgive me if I think you're offensive. If it would please you to ignore my writings and refrain from commenting from now on that would help to reduce the discomfort. Unbelievable.

If you don't want comments, you can always refrain from commenting yourself. It'll save you from "offensive" replies. Try it.

I think you got confused about who you were replying to.

Re: Mister Rogers had a point – routinely greeting six neighbors maximizes wellbeing

#140

Post by jacquesm »

midasuni wrote: post #130
jacquesm wrote: post #82

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I’ve never need to rely on anyone, other than of course normal economic transactions. That's funny. You are relying on thousands of other people every day, all day long. you just don't realize it. And not all of those are economic transactions there is plenty of goodwill involved. For instance, you rely on other people not to kill you when you are driving. Every time a stranger saves your bacon when you make a mist…

Those are normal expectation of living in society. Talking you your neighbour is not. I’m sure it was decades ago in the curtain twitching world where people stayed living int he same street for decades, but not today in a highly movable world. Certainly not for me any my peers. any interactions I make are slot my own choosing, that I happen to live near someone is of no consequence. If I did park my car in a ditch t…

> Those are normal expectation of living in society. Talking you your neighbour is not.

Errm.. yes, that's perfectly normal.

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