Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Beyond introvert vs. extrovert

vipshek.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

171–180 of 192 posts

Re: Beyond introvert vs. extrovert

#171

Post by _y5hn »

strken wrote: post #145
akhayam wrote: post #9

Introvert and extrovert is the most widely misunderstood thing I have seen at work and in personal life. This article also doesn’t do justice to the nuance that introverts find interactions with other “draining” … but it’s not necessary that they suck at it. I feel this way: having led teams of hundreds of people, I know I can have deep, meaningful and long conversations… but I don’t find them a source of joy. I enco…

The supposed "draining" of introverts sounds like a cold reading technique or something you'd read in a horoscope. It applies to nearly everyone to some degree. Enjoy socialising but after a party you're glad to put your feet up and read a book? Get slight anxiety making small talk with strangers, to the point where you feel bad if you do it for more than six hours? Don't want to hang out with your boss at the mandat…

That's not what draining means.

It may mean having to go to bed very early because you're all used up. The effects varies alot though.

It's not a preference.

Re: Beyond introvert vs. extrovert

#172

Post by MrDresden »

withinboredom wrote: post #18
sublinear wrote: post #5

I don't think the dichotomy is a bad rule of thumb to help understand someone, but it's certainly not their identity. I've come to find that it's down to the person's experience with and resulting preference for crowds and individuals. It's nurture, not nature. I used to be very introverted until I started living on my own as an adult and had shit to do and wanted things in life. I've also seen extroverts that mellow…

If you're a Myers Briggs person, apparently there is a 'secondary function' that you can 'switch to' and not drain as much energy (a therapist told me this once, no idea if it is true. I left and never returned; I am not a Myers Briggs person). Anyway, if true, then you just 'learn to be more comfortable in your secondary function' as you age. Anyway, I am most certainly an introvert. If anything, I've become more of…

> "Despite its popularity, it has been widely regarded as pseudoscience by the scientific community."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myers-Briggs_Type_Indicator

Re: Beyond introvert vs. extrovert

#173

Post by MrDresden »

dosman33 wrote: post #78
msoad wrote: post #2

I wonder if it's even worth trying to define a person's personality? I've been following this research for a while now. Almost all the studies I've seen have substantial flaws in their scientific methodology, such as small sample sizes and selection bias, among other issues. Don't even get me started on the replication crisis in this field. Regarding theories like Jung's introversion and extraversion or the subsequen…

I got a sigh of relief when I finally discovered that Myers-Briggs is partly broken. It's designed to not offend anyone by avoiding measuring neuroticism so it's "work-safe". I had been struggling to understand how people were able to understand personality defects of out of the Myers-Briggs system and then eventually it became clear that it doesn't do this, it avoids measuring neuroticism, and worse than that it's o…

> "Despite its popularity, it has been widely regarded as pseudoscience by the scientific community."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myers-Briggs_Type_Indicator

Re: Beyond introvert vs. extrovert

#175

Post by GuB-42 »

michaelteter wrote: post #144

One dimension often missing from these (intro/extro-vert) discussions is the matter of what kind of people and what circumstance the interactions involve. Put me in a large group of people I have little in common with or with whom I have no interest in -- but am forced to socialize with -- and I'm used up in minutes. But with people I can somewhat identify with, and in a situation which offers something for me, and I…

I would put that in the introvert spectrum. Complaining about "shallow" interactions is, I think, a big telltale sign of introversion.

I wouldn't call deep conversations a form of socializing, like being alone, this is a bubble, except this time, there are several people in the bubble. Extroverts don't like bubbles, and I am sure deep conversations are draining to them (I am not one, so it is just a guess), and they may want to break free of them, for example, by bringing in other people. On the contrary, in social situations, introverts will want to form the bubble as soon as they can, keeping the small talk and all that to a minimum.

Re: Beyond introvert vs. extrovert

#177

Post by karpierz »

GuB-42 wrote: post #175
michaelteter wrote: post #144

One dimension often missing from these (intro/extro-vert) discussions is the matter of what kind of people and what circumstance the interactions involve. Put me in a large group of people I have little in common with or with whom I have no interest in -- but am forced to socialize with -- and I'm used up in minutes. But with people I can somewhat identify with, and in a situation which offers something for me, and I…

I would put that in the introvert spectrum. Complaining about "shallow" interactions is, I think, a big telltale sign of introversion. I wouldn't call deep conversations a form of socializing, like being alone, this is a bubble, except this time, there are several people in the bubble. Extroverts don't like bubbles, and I am sure deep conversations are draining to them (I am not one, so it is just a guess), and they…

To add to this, I'd say that when people say "deep conversation", they generally mean "comfortable conversation".

A lot of conversations that I've heard described as "deep" are superficial discussions of philosophy/politics (see most of HN) or jargon-filled discussions of specific nerddoms that people are interested in.

Re: Beyond introvert vs. extrovert

#178

Post by jmye »

bmitc wrote: post #146
jmye wrote: post #135

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Seems like this is ascribing an awful lot of value judgement on personality type. I’ve had very deep conversations with people across the spectrum, and met a lot of introverts who couldn’t, or didn’t want to, talk at more than surface level.

I'm not sure what you mean by a value judgement. But these things are obviously personal, broad, statistical, and not absolute. Personality types are a thing though, and some types are more prone to certain behaviors and feelings than others. Doesn't mean it's always that way or better or worse. Probably what's being re-hit upon is that there's more to personality types than introvert and extrovert.

It’s the notion that “extroverts” aren’t capable of holding deep, intellectual conversations or that “introverts” are more prone to them. I accept that may not have been your intent, but it’s how I read that comment.

I fully agree with the second thing you said.

Re: Beyond introvert vs. extrovert

#180

Post by analog31 »

kmmlng wrote: post #161
analog31 wrote: post #99

Earlier quoted context omitted.

History doesn't support this. Bad ideas can be remarkably persistent. Yes I fear Jung's ideas if they give rise to beliefs that are harmful to me, or to society. An example would be biased stereotypes surrounding the introvert / extravert dichotomy. Disclosure: I'd probably test as an extravert, but would advise against identifying as an introvert in a business setting due to the bias against introverts.

Interesting, I would have considered the idea of pretending to be someone I'm not for extended periods of time to be far more harmful than any potential disadvantages I might experience in a busieness setting for being an introvert. I don't think any undue stereotypes around the introversion / extraversion dimension come from Jung, but have simply been attached to the concept by ill-informed society. It's hard to fau…

I think the question becomes how you identify. It's one thing to casually mention to your boss that you don't like social gatherings, quite another to have it become part of your official identity or electronic data record, so that people can use it as a sorting key. And of course a sliding scale between those extremes.

There's lots of things about me, that I can reveal to some people and not others. I want to be in control of the narrative.

Post reply on HN