Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service • Hacker News Board

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#131

Post by t-writescode » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:45 AM UTC

dymk wrote: post #84

nhchris wrote: post #43

> This might be hard, as no unwanted advances are taking place. We simply have students excelling at the course, and drawing-in a crowd. I should've been more clear with my "leching" comment. Still, it seems harassing in nature. It seems increasingly that society demands a world where dating only happens during designated and approved dating times and venues, and outside those strictly delimited places, men are to be…

Birth rates are tanking because of increased access to contraceptives and people having the wealth and freedom to enjoy their 20s and 30s unburdened by children

> people having the wealth and freedom to enjoy their 20s and 30s unburdened by children

and people *not* having the wealth and freedom to have children, being burdened by 80+ hour work weeks to pay rent on a place they'll never own or have capital in.

Listen to the millenials and gen z'ers before you make bold accusations.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#132

Post by SinePost » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:45 AM UTC

plaguepilled wrote: post #12

It is absolutely insane that the professor cannot eject an auditing student from their class. The relevant university is apparently a joke at the expense of fresher student safety.

From what I hear, this is the case in most universities (or at least in state schools). I really hope this doesn't spoil the view of students auditing on campus.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#133

Post by GalenErso » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:46 AM UTC

DoctorNick wrote: post #126

nhchris wrote: post #43

> This might be hard, as no unwanted advances are taking place. We simply have students excelling at the course, and drawing-in a crowd. I should've been more clear with my "leching" comment. Still, it seems harassing in nature. It seems increasingly that society demands a world where dating only happens during designated and approved dating times and venues, and outside those strictly delimited places, men are to be…

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Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#134

Post by t-writescode » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:46 AM UTC

ARandomerDude wrote: post #119

personjerry wrote: post #66

Earlier quoted context omitted.

THE DEFAULT IS "please don't hit on me right now"

If that's true, then the only way to let a woman know you're interested in her is after she has first told you. But that's a horrible way to make room for different personality types. Some women are assertive. Some are less so. Should the more reserved women just stay single?

Do the more reserved women want to stay single? Maybe they do!

And most people have introvert friends and extrovert friends. You meet safe and good people through friend circles and then they get you to meet the other person.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#135

Post by [deleted] » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:46 AM UTC

troupe wrote: post #95

wilsonnb3 wrote: post #74

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Nobody cares if college students try to date other students from their classes. It is weird when people take a class specifically because of that reason though. It is even weirder when the class in question is something that they have a very high skill level in specifically so that they will be able leverage that into some kind of situation that leads to dating. This is pretty cut and dry to me, I am not sure why so…

> It is weird when people take a class specifically because of that reason though. Really? I know people who specifically chose their entire major based on the ratio of women in that major.

[deleted]

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#136

Post by nhchris » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:46 AM UTC

I-love-india wrote: post #93

nhchris wrote: post #43

> This might be hard, as no unwanted advances are taking place. We simply have students excelling at the course, and drawing-in a crowd. I should've been more clear with my "leching" comment. Still, it seems harassing in nature. It seems increasingly that society demands a world where dating only happens during designated and approved dating times and venues, and outside those strictly delimited places, men are to be…

No, you just to treat women with respect. The issue here is intention. The intention here is not about teaching or learning in the class. But its using that pretence in fact distrupting the intention of the class and people there. How do you like your intention distrupted? How about by unattractive slobs who are objectifying you and trying to be "helpful" and trying tricks they found on internet If someone is trying…

You've assumed a great deal more about their behavior than was written. The professor even states "no unwanted advances are taking place", contradicting your characterization. Indeed, your extra assumptions would qualify as 'disruption', and I imagine the professor would be well within her rights to expel such students.

But merely offering, not pushing, assistance, or even less "showboating", letting students in search of help come to them if they want to, isn't disruption or even untoward.

> No, you just to treat women with respect.

We've really come to a point where even the purest romantic intentions (the post talks of wife material, not one night stands) are "disrespectful", have we?

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#137

Post by ShredKazoo » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:47 AM UTC

hnuser0000 wrote: post #79

A lot of you are okay with this?

She clarified "there are no unwanted advances".

Just because someone is uncomfortable does not mean there's something untoward going on. E.g. if I'm uncomfortable with two men kissing each other in public, it doesn't follow that those two men are creepy.

If you grow up with conservative parents, you may be socialized to believe that men kissing each other is creepy, when it is actually normal and healthy. Similarly, if you grow up on tumblr, you may be socialized to believe that men taking steps to meet women is creepy, when it is actually normal and healthy.

>Lots of creeps here in the comments too. Some might call a 22 year old pretending to be helpful to younger 17 year olds for their ulterior motives, "grooming".

You're pulling in a separate issue of someone being under the age of consent. Let's focus on one thing at a time.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#138

Post by vermilingua » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:47 AM UTC

gnicholas wrote: post #102

vermilingua wrote: post #94

Earlier quoted context omitted.

“College students taking social classes with no intention of learning” is not exactly headline material though.

I got the sense it was an academic class, not a social class. Also, most students who take classes with no interest in learning would either skip class or keep their mouths shut. The problem here is that they're degrading the learning environment for others.

100 level classes barely qualify as academic, and we must have had very different academic experiences if you believe that “most students… with no intention of learning… keep their mouths shut”.

There has always been a population of students that attend college/uni with seemingly no higher goal than scoring and making life worse for everyone around them. The only interesting development here is that the published diversity data has allowed them to finally create Scumbaggery as a Service.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#139

Post by Aperocky » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:47 AM UTC

dymk wrote: post #84

nhchris wrote: post #43

> This might be hard, as no unwanted advances are taking place. We simply have students excelling at the course, and drawing-in a crowd. I should've been more clear with my "leching" comment. Still, it seems harassing in nature. It seems increasingly that society demands a world where dating only happens during designated and approved dating times and venues, and outside those strictly delimited places, men are to be…

Birth rates are tanking because of increased access to contraceptives and people having the wealth and freedom to enjoy their 20s and 30s unburdened by children

More like people could not save up enough wealth and freedom in their 20s and 30s to afford children.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#140

Post by onepointsixC » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:47 AM UTC

gnicholas wrote: post #102

vermilingua wrote: post #94

Earlier quoted context omitted.

“College students taking social classes with no intention of learning” is not exactly headline material though.

I got the sense it was an academic class, not a social class. Also, most students who take classes with no interest in learning would either skip class or keep their mouths shut. The problem here is that they're degrading the learning environment for others.

Are they actually? Providing tutoring and help doesn't seem to degrade the learning environment.