321–330 of 692 posts
I'd say the explosion of mental health and anxiety is playing a huge part in it as well. My wife and I would have a child if we knew we were stable and able to look after them properly. Also, with the wars, global warming and everything else that's happening right now, why would you want to bring a child into this?
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Entertainment has entered a tyranny of choice. I see it personally. I can watch nearly every show and movie that was ever created but I still flip through Netflix and RT endlessly, often times choosing not to watch anything. When I was younger I would just watch Seinfeld re-runs, with commercials and all. Am I more "entertained" today than I was when I was growing up? I'm not convinced. The weirdest thing is I don't…
Podcasts changed the game for me on this. Now there are entire days where I never turn the TV on. A bonus is that I can get basic chores done while listening or workout. It really freed me from the couch potato routine. A bonus is that many of them are educational and released weekly, so "binge" isn't really an option. There are certainly "junk food" podcasts that I listen to but the ratio of informative to junk comp…
I don't think tech or porn is the main culprit. It's that people now have way more entertainment options other than sex. Of course, a lot for those entertainment options are being driven by tech. Back in my dad's days, they were poor so the only entertainment options in their free time was drinking cheap home made alcohol, dancing and sex, while now we have gaming, Netflix, tic-tok, porn, traveling to the infinite In…
It's unfortunately a lot sadder than that. You'd be suprised at the amount of males that want to have sex but just can't get any. There is a serious case of looks inflation nowadays with Tinder etc.
Every time I broke up I was mildly welcoming some time for myself but never managed to be single more than a handful of weeks. And I don't consider myself particularly more attractive/interesting than everybody out there.
I don't think tech or porn is the main culprit. It's that people now have way more entertainment options other than sex. Of course, a lot for those entertainment options are being driven by tech. Back in my dad's days, they were poor so the only entertainment options in their free time was drinking cheap home made alcohol, dancing and sex, while now we have gaming, Netflix, tic-tok, porn, traveling to the infinite In…
Sex is beautiful, but I would always prefer a meaningful human relationship with common interests and good communications without sex over an sex-filled relationship without the rest. Or to put it simply: Love without sex is greater than sex without love. Prefarably both, but it is a thing two people need to want : )
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Reading stuff like this makes me really glad that I married my first girlfriend. We've been married for over 10 years now. She was really out of my league. I did compromise on many things including age gap (she is older), past baggage and the fact that I have to let her win every argument and do everything she says but I'm glad because she was the opportunity of my life and I took it and I've never been so lucky sinc…
If you don't mind me asking, what are some things you like that you feel make it worth being with this person? (since you mentioned past baggage and having to 'let her win every argument' - that doesn't sound too nice)
I don't think tech or porn is the main culprit. It's that people now have way more entertainment options other than sex. Of course, a lot for those entertainment options are being driven by tech. Back in my dad's days, they were poor so the only entertainment options in their free time was drinking cheap home made alcohol, dancing and sex, while now we have gaming, Netflix, tic-tok, porn, traveling to the infinite In…
The article doesn't really mention if the numbers are related to sexual partners or number of times the deed is performed. Many years ago, I remember my friend having "encounters" with many different women usually lasting one night. While I had only a few partners, but had much higher deeds. I've noticed "the youth" in general are kind of like my friend. Not into settling down, but rather going for the variety. Howev…
I think for the majority of guys, the rigmarole around getting hookups was always a delicate calculus involving tradeoffs in money and time, for an uncertain payoff: a good lay if you’re lucky and bragging rights.
Now the economy is tighter and society has made bragging about conquests a bit less acceptable, so I think our pattern of just having deep (and free) sex with a loving partner is much more appealing.
We don’t, unfortunately, have many first hand accounts of how people survived during these times.
I do remember a poignant scene in Saving Private Ryan as Tom Hanks and the squad are moving through a shelled European city. I think it’s in France, but it’s been so long since I’ve seen the film.
In that scene they come across a mother and daughter living in an apartment, with no real hope of a better life as most of the city has been bombed. They invite themselves in for tea. A young Private catches the eye of the daughter, and vice versa. Tom Hanks, the mother, and rest of the squad pretend that they’re having tea and talking and laughing while the two young people go to a different room (subtext being to have a discussion of their own). Tom Hanks looks at the mother and gives her a warm smile. Everyone has a stupid-grin look on their face, acting ignorant. The scene, out of place though it may be, acknowledges the needs of young people, and that older generations sometimes literally have to play a part, and move out of the way and let the young people do what they desire to do and to not strip them of or take away their opportunities.
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Not only entertainment suffers from a tyranny of choice, but also sex and relationships. I heard in an interview that 50 years ago, people used to basically used to fall in love with heir neighbours and coworkers. Modern dating means browsing hundreds of other people in your city like they're products on a store shelf, always with the feeling there might be someone better just a couple swipes away.
I see this explanation of the grind of online dating a lot, and I think it misses a more fundamental point: people fundamentally are pretty terrible at talking to strangers. Without conversational skills, a vast majority of online dating conversations simply fizzle out; often times simply due to disinterest, but I think almost always due to a lack of ability to hold a conversation and be both interesting and interest…
Any explanation of the shittiness of straight dating apps has to center gender norms and roles.
I mean, when you get down to it, if the point of sex is 'cuz it feels good', why not just take drugs, or skydive, or eat an entire pepperoni pizza? Less chance of disease, you don't have to make yourself attractive, you can have it any time you want. If we could eliminate the sex drive, imagine how much less strife there'd be in the world, how much less consumerism. How much more of our time could be spent bettering ourselves and the world without the object of mating. Imagine how much psychological and physical damage has been caused around the world due to shame or abuse surrounding sex. Sex might be one of the worst motivating principles of humanity. Maybe it's time for us to evolve past it.