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Ask HN: Why are people in real life so different?
91–100 of 264 posts
Re: Ask HN: Why are people in real life so different?
#92It's impossible to convince most people of even the most obvious truths. The wisest path is to fake agreement, keep your thoughts for yourself and move away ASAP. Online it seems you can get away with more honest talk without consequences. Or at least it used to. Now it's getting more like offline.
> It's impossible to convince most people of even the most obvious truths. You should maybe ask yourself why you need to convince them. > The wisest path is to fake agreement, keep your thoughts for yourself and move away ASAP. That's not wise, that's dishonest to the other person and to yourself. The last part (avoiding the other person) is obviously a completely valid option, but only one of several.
That's not wise, that's dishonest to the other person and to yourself.
Yeah, you're probably right.
Re: Ask HN: Why are people in real life so different?
#93People don't feel guilt online, generally, because they either forget the person they are talking to is a vulnerable human, or they just imagine them as someone deserving of their vitriol. However, as soon as they are sat in front of someone and are picking up on the visual clues in facial expressions and body language which make it clear that what they are saying is actually affecting a real person with feelings, al…
Would this apply to remote work culture?
It could, but you don’t get a paycheck from online forums. Remembering that someone is paying you will sometimes work to curb excessive misbehavior.
Re: Ask HN: Why are people in real life so different?
#94It's impossible to convince most people of even the most obvious truths. The wisest path is to fake agreement, keep your thoughts for yourself and move away ASAP. Online it seems you can get away with more honest talk without consequences. Or at least it used to. Now it's getting more like offline.
Befriending someone makes it easier to convince them of something.
Not sure why you think I want to convince anybody. The original poster asked why people seems so conformist IRL, as oppossed to online. I just explained that most people learned that being Don Quixote is dangerous.
Re: Ask HN: Why are people in real life so different?
#95[deleted]
Re: Ask HN: Why are people in real life so different?
#96Earlier quoted context omitted.
https://hn.algolia.com/?dateRange=all&page=0&prefix=true&sor...
I meant for real, Dan - like bring down the ban hammer more forcefully. Let's get serious about cleaning up this place.
You seem to be assuming that we don't enforce HN's rules. We do enforce the rules, but only on the posts we see. We don't see every post—there are too many.
You, or anyone, can help by flagging posts that break the site guidelines, and in egregious cases by emailing hn@ycombinator.com.
Re: Ask HN: Why are people in real life so different?
#97The main reason is that almost all content online comes from people who are mentally ill. Commenting or creating anything online is really weird. Normal people don't do this, so you're interacting with a very different group of people on your computer than in real life. > people in real life seem so much more complacent and uncritical compared to people online This is just to avoid conflict. I'm sure they feel the sa…
We have a word for people who live life read-only, consuming their surroundings - NPCs. Not sure who's really mentally ill in this situation.
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Re: Ask HN: Why are people in real life so different?
#98The people in my real life are not like you describe and they're much more intelligent than most HN goers. I use HN and other sources for volume on-demand, not quality. i.e. I get a higher quality of discussion out of my friends, but I can't drop-in to one of those 3 minutes before my next meeting (or, like now, while I'm waiting for my parents in the Whole Foods parking lot).
This is actually my biggest reason why I like cities: friends like these are all close by.
Re: Ask HN: Why are people in real life so different?
#99It isn't about the threat of physical violence, I think it has to do with replying to a broader sense that exists out there while in person you first have to build up that sense with the person you're talking to and this takes more effort and time and so necessitates different behaviours. Text is imo the main factor, if we switch to audio people behave more like in real life.
Re: Ask HN: Why are people in real life so different?
#100Earlier quoted context omitted.
https://hn.algolia.com/?dateRange=all&page=0&prefix=true&sor...
I meant for real, Dan - like bring down the ban hammer more forcefully. Let's get serious about cleaning up this place.
I think dang is already doing an inhuman amount of work. He's easily the most active and most thoughtful moderator I've ever seen. He's a machine. Hard to imagine how things can be better than it's now unless we overhaul then entire moderation model and make it more distributed, like Slashdot (not saying that Slashdot specifically is better; it isn't) .