Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Exit interviews are a trap

jacobian.org

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

421–430 of 431 posts

Re: Exit interviews are a trap

#421

Post by fleddr »

genousti wrote: post #394
fleddr wrote: post #288

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Here's my old man manual to life at work. Show up and do the work, consistently. Just this basic discipline puts you in the top 20% of performers, everywhere. Make your superiors look good and in any case, not bad. They don't care what you do for as long as you do this. This does not require sucking up, just deliver. Be reliable. Deliver on promises, likewise do not commit to a promise you can't fulfill and explain w…

You dream if you think that will get you opportunities. In most companies being good and realiable at your job without playing the game ends with you doing always the same job because why would they promote someone who is good at what he does and never complains about being promoted or raised? They will see u as useful in your current state

Not my experience, but every culture is different.

Re: Exit interviews are a trap

#422

Post by throwaway6532 »

ghusto wrote: post #406
throwaway6532 wrote: post #323

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You, my friend, are not cynical enough.

Haha, I actually think I've gone full circle.

“Before one studies Zen, mountains are mountains and waters are waters; after a first glimpse into the truth of Zen, mountains are no longer mountains and waters are no longer waters; after enlightenment, mountains are once again mountains and waters once again waters.”

I think you've reached enlightenment.

Re: Exit interviews are a trap

#423

Post by roguas »

bradlys wrote: post #265
fleddr wrote: post #233

You should definitely go to an exit interview. In the case of a sour breakup, you should 100% lie. Just say it was great but you were in need for a change. Don't dramatize the lying part because you lied to get in and the employer lied about how great their company is. Work is a lie, play the game. In the case of a drama-free breakup, when pressed for feedback and the room being receptive of it, do share your thought…

> Work is a lie, play the game. If there’s any advice I could ever give anyone who has any amount of integrity and tries to live an honest life - it’s this alone. If you don’t play the game - you’re not playing the game everyone else is and you will always lose in the end. Extremely painful to deal with for bright eyed young folks or those switching industries thinking things might be different.

Disagree. The game is not set in stone, you can kick the table. Now, honesty is tricky, you can aim at being honest but not trying to be mean. You can aim at being honest but not disclosing everything. Many angles possible before going for "yeah dude, just lie".

The game changes as we change. Scamming people used to be tolerated, its less and less tolerated now. Often going as far where you can honestly question if the proposed thing is really a scam or just overpriced service/good. We make those boundries.

Re: Exit interviews are a trap

#424

Post by samstave »

samstave wrote: post #212
djrogers wrote: post #205

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Also, if you have an IOS device - log into your apple account and confirm the devices tied to it.. HR will (in many SV orgs) attempt to add a device to your apple account to monitor you. This comes off as more than just a little bit paranoid - HR can't just add devices to your iCloud account. It requires credentials and 2FA to do that for one thing, and it'd be illegal in most of the countries we're in to boot.

Sure, we will go with your assessment of assumption over my hard evidence to the contrary... Good thing that such acts are * illegal* - that'll show'em. -- FYI - KEEP YOUR PERSONAL SHIT PERSONAL. --- One must develop a personal air-gap.

One's entire house should be an air gap in-and-oof-to-itself

Re: Exit interviews are a trap

#425

Post by ca98am79 »

fleddr wrote: post #233

You should definitely go to an exit interview. In the case of a sour breakup, you should 100% lie. Just say it was great but you were in need for a change. Don't dramatize the lying part because you lied to get in and the employer lied about how great their company is. Work is a lie, play the game. In the case of a drama-free breakup, when pressed for feedback and the room being receptive of it, do share your thought…

I don't see how lying can ever be recommended. It purposely misinforms. It distorts the worldview of those who are lied to. You can be honest in a kind way. You don't have to always say everything. But don't lie!

Don't lie, it is not helpful and just misleads those who you lie to. It is cowardly. It's much better to be honest and kind.

Re: Exit interviews are a trap

#426

Post by nitwit005 »

throwaway6532 wrote: post #328
nitwit005 wrote: post #114

Seems pointlessly Machiavellian. Sure, theoretically, you could get burned by what you say in an exit interview. I've never heard of it happening. Typically you end up being the 20th person to say what you said. If your company is so poisonous they won't give you a referral based on feedback they requested, they probably wouldn't give you a referral no matter what.

There seems to be two camps of people in the comments here. One camp is saying more or less what you say, and the other camp is people who have had it happen to them personally and don't wish to expose themselves to the possibility of the downside risk again knowing how sucky it can be. Source: I've experienced a situation where I gave honest feedback and nothing bad happened, and I've experience a situation where I…

You seem to have entirely skipped over the second paragraph of what I said.

Re: Exit interviews are a trap

#427

Post by ionwake »

grayclhn wrote: post #374
ionwake wrote: post #272

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I’m weirded out by how this comment is exactly how to handle it imo but not many others seem to agree. I’m perplexed. I get more confused about other peoples opinions the older I get but maybe that’s the thing I’m older and wiser. Or maybe I’m just an idiot.

Just think for a second about the overlap between “people who want to speak their mind in an exit interview” and “people who like arguing in online forums” and the comment disparity makes a lot of sense…

thank you for this reply it helps

Re: Exit interviews are a trap

#428

Post by okeuro49 »

bumby wrote: post #165
heurisko wrote: post #84

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Would you prefer that employee voice their opinion during exit If it's something really important, e.g. safety culture, then the employee should have already raised this much, much earlier. If the company didn't listen then, then evidently they see concerning behaviour as an acceptable cost of running their business in a certain way. I think it's bad to say anything revelatory in an exit interview, as it shows you…

To the point of another post, I don't think they are mutually exclusive unless the exit interview is held by the same person who you would normally voice daily concerns to (e.g., direct supervisor). Many organizations have exit interviews scheduled with people many levels higher precisely because they recognize the middle-managers won't have the ability to sanitize the feedback first. Meaning it's possible to have be…

All that is useful to the company, but not to the employee leaving. I would agree there are potential upsides to a company, but there are only potential downsides for the employee.

If a company wants to get feedback from the shop floor, they can run anonymous employee surveys.

Re: Exit interviews are a trap

#429

Post by arkasan »

fleddr wrote: post #288
bradlys wrote: post #265

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Work is a lie, play the game. If there’s any advice I could ever give anyone who has any amount of integrity and tries to live an honest life - it’s this alone. If you don’t play the game - you’re not playing the game everyone else is and you will always lose in the end. Extremely painful to deal with for bright eyed young folks or those switching industries thinking things might be different.

Here's my old man manual to life at work. Show up and do the work, consistently. Just this basic discipline puts you in the top 20% of performers, everywhere. Make your superiors look good and in any case, not bad. They don't care what you do for as long as you do this. This does not require sucking up, just deliver. Be reliable. Deliver on promises, likewise do not commit to a promise you can't fulfill and explain w…

This only works up to some point. Specially when you become senior, just doing the work will keep you in same position forever. Maybe you will get your annual raise etc, but people who play the game will move up and you likely have to listen and build things the way they want, even if you know the problem space well and have a good solution.

Re: Exit interviews are a trap

#430

Post by noir_lord »

jldugger wrote: post #347
scruple wrote: post #181

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Of the 9 lead devs they had at the time (including me) they lost 7 over the next 8mths (I already knew three where leaving in the interview just hadn't announced it yet). > It took them another 8mths to decide that remote might be an option, after literal decades of experience on their systems (not me I was a relatively new hire) walked out the door. I am starting to see this happen at work. We've undergone a re-or…

> Anyway, in nearly 15 years in this industry, I think that I've maybe had 1 company I was interviewing with ask me for my references and I can't even recall if they used them. Background checks wont even always ask your permission before verifying your employment history. They usually won't even need contact info from you.

Perhaps but I'm in the UK not the US and background checks outside of specific industries (finance/law etc) aren't a thing.

I know this because I've been on the hiring side a lot and have never done it myself.

Post reply on HN