Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

dontasktoask.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

91–100 of 391 posts

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#91

Post by uses »

This reminds me of the chat situation where a coworker will start with "Hi!" typing indicator.

In either case, it's like "yes, you have my attention. I cannot focus on anything at all until you hit enter, and I also can't reply because I have nothing to reply to".

I also can't complain like "hey if you're going to interrupt me can you just say the whole message so I can actually reply instead of being held in absolute suspense for many seconds of my life?" because that would be, frankly, even worse than what they're doing, which was done out of a kind of ignorance of etiquette.

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#92

Post by atuladhar »

jagged-chisel wrote: post #34
bluefirebrand wrote: post #22

Earlier quoted context omitted.

For me it's not because I want an input/output type conversation, it's because I want to maintain asynchronous conversation. If I reply "I'm fine thanks how are you" then you know I'm here and looking, you've forced me to into a synchronous conversation and now I will appear rude if I don't immediately answer your "I just have a quick question" If you just post your question upfront, I can read it and prioritize it m…

I'm the 'engineer' side of the equation. But often I need async interaction with various others. So I just combine it all in one message: Hey, Jo! I just have a quick question for when you have a moment: And leave it. I'll ping Jo again at a time interval depending on urgency - sometime this sprint? I'll remind about the message in a couple days. Need it today? I indicate that when I ask, and about 4hrs later I'll po…

+1 to this. That example message is very close to how I phrase questions in chats as well.

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#93

Post by topaz0 »

wongarsu wrote: post #73
nineplay wrote: post #68

I'll blame stackoverflow. It's lead us to believe that anything but a precise, specific questions with clear use cases and previous attempt is going to get scolded for not meeting the guidelines. It takes time to formulate a good tech question. "Why isn't my API getting called" is a easy question to ask but not likely to get much feedback. "Why isn't my API getting called I'm using library and callback and routing fr…

Formulating a question that doesn't waste your time requires me to shift perspective to figure out what information you need. As a result, half the time formulating the question leads me to discovering the answer. I'd consider that time well spent regardless of the answers I get.

I've also experienced this. I wonder if this phenomenon leads to an overwhelming selection bias in what questions actually get to stackoverflow or irc or slack or whatever. It could be that the majority of people are good at asking good questions, but they usually don't get through formulating their good question before answering it themselves, so the majority of questions end up being bad.

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#94

Post by hkon »

uses wrote: post #91

This reminds me of the chat situation where a coworker will start with "Hi!" typing indicator . In either case, it's like "yes, you have my attention. I cannot focus on anything at all until you hit enter, and I also can't reply because I have nothing to reply to". I also can't complain like "hey if you're going to interrupt me can you just say the whole message so I can actually reply instead of being held in absolu…

Indeed, which is why I have turned off the "someone is typing" in the UI.

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#95

Post by felix318 »

A bit off-topic perhaps but as a non-native speaker I'm always baffled by English smalltalk. People who reach out to me on Teams usually start with "Hi, how are you" and I never know what is the proper reply because I know the question is not sincere. Why not just say "Hi"?

(and this is nothing compared to the seemingly mandatory Monday morning elevator "how was your weekend" question)

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#96

Post by meribold »

RcouF1uZ4gsC wrote: post #50

If you really want a question answered, the best way to get your answer is to write a blog post confidently giving the incorrect answer and post it on HN and Reddit. In the replies, you will find many answers to your question.

This principle is also known as Poe's law.

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#97

Post by mynameisash »

uses wrote: post #91

This reminds me of the chat situation where a coworker will start with "Hi!" typing indicator . In either case, it's like "yes, you have my attention. I cannot focus on anything at all until you hit enter, and I also can't reply because I have nothing to reply to". I also can't complain like "hey if you're going to interrupt me can you just say the whole message so I can actually reply instead of being held in absolu…

Which is why a lot of people set their status message (on Teams, Slack, etc.,) to "nohello.com"

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#98

Post by dom96 »

uses wrote: post #91

This reminds me of the chat situation where a coworker will start with "Hi!" typing indicator . In either case, it's like "yes, you have my attention. I cannot focus on anything at all until you hit enter, and I also can't reply because I have nothing to reply to". I also can't complain like "hey if you're going to interrupt me can you just say the whole message so I can actually reply instead of being held in absolu…

What I do in this instance is mute that person for an hour or so and leave to do what I was doing. It means a less quick response to the person but keeps me sane a lot of the time.

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#99

Post by vymague »

nkrisc wrote: post #38
vymague wrote: post #36

It's complaining for the sake of complaining. Sometimes you need to test the water first. Some online communities are rather hostile after all. As shown by this silly website.

Hostile? What, are they going to break down your door and beat you? If they say mean words when you ask a question just close the channel and try somewhere else. I'm well aware you might think I'm proving your point with this response.

> I'm well aware you might think I'm proving your point with this response.

You are correct. Your comment was mean. Not even sure why you responded aggressively.

Hostile is perfectly correct word to describe some online communities. Do you think the word "hostile" only applies when you meet people physically?

Post reply on HN