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Dating in Delhi when you're poor

reuters.com

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Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#201

Post by DoreenMichele »

zamzoid wrote: post #199
DoreenMichele wrote: post #162

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The amount they are proposing for UBI wouldn't even cover rent in some parts of the US. Or it would barely cover rent in some places with little or nothing leftover. Online conversations about UBI frequently include comments to the effect that "If you had UBI, you could move someplace with lower rent." It amounts to the latest version of putting homeless people on a bus and shipping them elsewhere so they stop being…

I truly appreciate the insight you gave on zoning, housing, and healthcare. But I feel we are talking past each other, and you are attacking a strawman. I never implied UBI would be a catch all solution to the problem of homelessness. You are attacking the people who treat it as such when I said explicitly it is only one of several remedies. I simply meant 1) it seems like a good solution for replacing food stamps, a…

The stimulus checks aren't actually a test of UBI. A global pandemic isn't business as usual by any stretch of the imagination.

I'm all for doing more for families with dependent children. You didn't ask me about that. You asked me why I think UBI doesn't work. I answered that.

My reply is not argumentative at all. It's just a reply to a question I was asked. That's all it is.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#202

Post by capybara_2020 »

rainhacker wrote: post #182

We never went to malls as everything there was out of my budget. I was also afraid that they would throw us out because we couldn’t speak English Reading this breaks my heart. In a few weeks India beings an year-long celebration to mark the country’s 75th Independence Day. And yet people feel discriminated because the don’t speak English.

It is not just English. Traditional clothes are also frowned upon. A few years there was a case of a man not being let into a mall because he was wearing a Dhoti(A traditional Indian men's wear, prevalent in some parts of the country.) But the irony was he had to argue in English to be let in.

And something I heard years back. Kids were not allowed into another school where a competition was being held. Why...because they were in dhotis and not in uniform. The only problem, that was their school uniform.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#203

Post by fdfsasd22323 »

buu700 wrote: post #192
austhrow743 wrote: post #189

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What do policies have to do with anything? This isn't global warming where the big deal is only in the aggregate. That there are X million people you cant help even if you do all you can doesn't undermine the fact that if you make hundreds of thousands of dollars you could change the lives of many forever with not much of a lifestyle hit for yourself.

So, just to be clear, your position is that any >=middle-class person who doesn't donate the majority of their wealth to charity is "evil"? What do policies have to do with anything? I can't tell if this is a serious question. Policies are how we effect change at scale. Relying on countless people to each independently make the decision to follow your particular moral values isn't a practical solution for addressing…

I don't want to speak for the person you're replying to, but..

> any >=middle-class person who doesn't donate the majority of their wealth to charity is "evil"?

That is pretty much Peter Singer's position (who incidentally is Australian, and it appears the person you're replying to may be also), who is if nothing else at least providing serious and cogent arguments for such a position. You may disagree, but he argues fairly respectably, IMO.

I'm a bit on the fence on that one, but I think there's something to be said for the fact that there is at least some immorality happening if a person worth 100.000$ walks past someone worth 0$ and doesn't help them out at least a little.

If you're curious about this line of reasoning, here's a nice introduction: https://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2013/12/giving...

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#204

Post by anovikov »

Seriously, a dinner for two costs $125 in India in a place with $400 average monthly income? This is what it would cost here in Cyprus, short of really nice places in Nicosia or Limassol, and the monthly income is 5x as much. Maybe $200 in the very nicest of places.

I'm a developer and make in mid-six figures, and whenever i see a $125 bill including tips, i start to feel like "oh, this is pricey".

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#205

Post by zamzoid »

DoreenMichele wrote: post #201
zamzoid wrote: post #199

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I truly appreciate the insight you gave on zoning, housing, and healthcare. But I feel we are talking past each other, and you are attacking a strawman. I never implied UBI would be a catch all solution to the problem of homelessness. You are attacking the people who treat it as such when I said explicitly it is only one of several remedies. I simply meant 1) it seems like a good solution for replacing food stamps, a…

The stimulus checks aren't actually a test of UBI. A global pandemic isn't business as usual by any stretch of the imagination. I'm all for doing more for families with dependent children. You didn't ask me about that. You asked me why I think UBI doesn't work. I answered that. My reply is not argumentative at all. It's just a reply to a question I was asked. That's all it is.

Okay, I’m really trying to have a good-faith conversation about this, maybe my questions weren’t super clear. I am very interested in your opinion, as you seem to have experience and also have thought about this a lot (and I think many of us on HN appreciate the unique perspective you have to offer). I am just having a hard time seeing the difference between “reducing barriers to food stamps in the US”, as you said and “giving regular checks to people”. Could you elaborate what this would look like? And how is it possible for checks to “not solve anything” when they have demonstrated effectiveness in decreasing poverty in the real world? Is the pandemic really that different a situation in this case? Maybe your definition of a solution here is different than mine?

EDIT: And of course I also don’t want to burden you with endless questioning. If you have written about this I would be happy to read links. You just have a lot of websites and a lot of content so it is difficult for me to find your writing on this particular topic.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#206

Post by ramraj07 »

Kakashi4 wrote: post #193
ramraj07 wrote: post #181

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Grew up in india, spent my twenties in the US, and now back in India. I can give you some potential explanation: Even though the poor and lower middle class make abjectly low amounts of money, the upper middle class and the rich actually make money comparable to most developed countries. This is reflected in the real estate prices (Chennai, the fourth largest city, has prices comparable to Brooklyn). I can make 200k…

The upper middle class does not nearly make money comparable to most developed countries. If you make 200k USD a year in India you are strictly rich. I make 10x less than you and I'm still upper middle class. The average rent in a place like Anna Nagar in Chennai (which is probably one of the most expensive places to live) is about 50,000 INR a month or ~700$ for a 3 bhk apartment. In comparison, the average rent in…

The median price for a home in Brooklyn in 900k, which translates to 6 crores. That’s definitely not a median price in central Chennai but it’s also not very far away. There’s also a significantly larger discrepancy between rent and home prices in India so that’s there.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#207

Post by pm90 »

nine_zeros wrote: post #68

I would contend it's easier to date in India. Cheap thrills are everywhere, far too many people around for you to stick out of the crowd (you just need to be a few train/bus stops away from familiar locations). Strikingly, transportation is cheap. No need to own a car/get expensive Uber rides. And street food is plenty and delicious. Simple dating is much easier for everyone in the spectrum. Societal issues on the ot…

Its not easier to "date" in India. The society, especially the "traditional" families, are still not accepting of dating. As the article points out, pre-marital sex is still taboo for a large section of society. Alcohol consumption is frowned upon. You really have to be extremely careful when you hang out as a "couple".

> far too many people around for you to stick out of the crowd (you just need to be a few train/bus stops away from familiar locations).

Except that everyone seems to be extremely nosy, are part of extended clans, so it feels incredibly suffocating. You feel like you're always being watched, even if that seems silly (it happens often enough to cause concern but not 100% of the time).

In liberal/Western countries, dating is so much easier. You can meet with anyone over coffee/drinks, hang out anywhere, make out in public, whatever.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#208

Post by pm90 »

webmobdev wrote: post #27

Something I dislike about the whole "dating" thing (a very US cultural influence due to their media) is that what is supposed to be a normal socialising event between too people, is made into a consumerist ritual . So much that two couples walking in a park or hanging with their friends is not really a "date" or you being cheapskate as, apparently, romance without money is no longer romance.

The idea of having to spend a lot of money on dates is quite a dated (lol) idea in the US. Perhaps it was true for earlier generations, or maybe it was something that was portrayed a lot in the movies or whatever. My experience has always been of meeting other people for conversation and shared activities.

Expensive dinners for first dates are actually pretty tacky and many women will consider it a red flag/try hard.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#209

Post by pm90 »

benrapscallion wrote: post #163
triceratops wrote: post #116

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"Arranged marriage" in an Indian context doesn't necessarily imply "parents tell you who to marry". In many cases it's essentially parent-involved matchmaking. There may be a professional matchmaker or family astrologer who sources leads. The prospective bride and bridegroom consider multiple or even dozens of options, and discuss their favorites with their parents or other close relatives. The bride/groom visit each…

For a (somewhat fake) introduction to this concept, check out Indian Matchmaking on Netflix.

> (somewhat fake)

To be clear, it doesn't seem fake, just something that only happens in the rich/upper classes. Most middle class Indians will not pay for professional matchmakers, they simply rely on their extended family/social networks to find ideal suitors for their (grown up) children.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#210

Post by superfreek »

Delhi has a per capita annual income of 300,000 rupees ($4,615) - the highest in the country and three times the national average. But nearly half of the city’s population lives in slums without basic services and facilities like drinking water, garbage disposal or a proper drainage system.

And life goes on, and little change is made. Many nations are so unfortunate to live in a poor society, with not so many chances of getting better.

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