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My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

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Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#381
post #282

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And yet you wouldn’t like to fall within those 2-8%.

Aren't you more worried about the 99% of rape victims who receive no justice of any kind?

I am, and still I prefer a system where some guilty people will avoid a punishment versus an overreaching system which will also punish some innocent people for some kind of a greater good.

What the linked article is talking about, though, does not seem to be „rape” as defined by a criminal code, so all this rape discussion hardly applies.

Nevertheless, one can be a creepy disgusting asshole and still not do things which are illegal, technically speaking.

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#382

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Of course not, but that's because I know my friend personally. If I saw someone putting up posters outside my apartment complex saying "the guy in Unit 214 is an asshole, he used to beat me up in middle school", I wouldn't spread the accusation without knowing more about what's going on.

Even if you had multiple other people corroborate it?

I can't imagine a situation where I would spread an accusation against someone I don't know based on the word of other people I don't know. I'm frankly a bit confused why this is controversial - it seems like common sense to me, and nobody I know in real life has ever done this. (Of course, this is symmetric, so I wouldn't disbelieve the accusation either.)

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#383

Earlier quoted context omitted.

She was left panicked and crying. That's not generally a sign that there was unambiguous consent. And it doesn't take a Rasputin-like figure to be an abuser. Plenty of people are taken advantage of and taught to believe things they later realize were abusive, even in relatively short situations. Pretty held all the power here -- he controlled where she was staying, he helped her get to the conference, she was intoxic…

She says that she remembers panicking and crying. I agree that those are both clear signs of non-consensual sex. Why does it take months and therapy for her to decode those clear signals? If Jon noticed her crying and panicking we would expect him to interpret that as a clear "I do not consent" signal. The power Pretty holds here is pretty minor. He's helping her get into conferences and mentoring her. He "controlled…

> Why does it take months and therapy for her to decode those clear signals?

Because brains aren't just bundles of logical interpreters that fully understand what they are experiencing all the time. There are many, many reasons why we may rationalize some behavior in the moment. Why do victims of cons sometimes defend the con artists for significant periods of time after they leave? Why do humans hold out hope for lost loved ones, when the evidence is clear they've passed away?

Emotionally charged topics take a long time for our minds to process sometimes. Sometimes we need help from others to put our thoughts in order or to gain perspective. Maybe she never asked herself, "Why was I crying?" until a therapist said, "Why were you crying?" We're all wired different, and we have to allow for some flexibility in how were perceive and react to events -- especially traumatic events.

> To me, that implies you are suggesting it should be illegal to have sex with this woman - after all, she apparently can't tell if she consented or not.

Come on, that's a clear strawman. I'm happy to disagree with you about this and discuss it, but that whole paragraph feels needlessly out of line.

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#384
There has been a common theme in this thread that the justice system should just sort it all out. Leaving aside all the issues of jurisdiction and citizenship that make a prosecution vanishingly unlikely here, the criminal justice system is just not cut out for dealing with cases of rape.

To prove it beyond reasonable doubt would require a level of evidence that is simply not present here. And in the UK, a suspect is only charged with a crime in 1.4% of reported cases[0]. This is why its so sickening when people gloat that some defendant in a sexual abuse case was found not guilty; it really doesn't mean they didn't commit the crime.

But even though the criminal justice system is not cut out for this kind of thing, that doesn't mean we have no other recourse. The reason the standard for evidence is so high is because the system would otherwise be vulnerable to abuse, and the consequences of wrongful conviction (loss of liberty or even execution) are so grave. Whether or not you agree that this very high standard is justified (I don't), it is clear that the consequences of publicly calling out this behaviour are less serious. Social ostracisation within a very specific community isn't such a big deal, but the direct benefits (protecting women through awareness) may be almost as good.

Whether or not you agree with the above, it's definitely an issue we need to think about. All it takes is someone close to you going through this to realise that the pre-MeToo system is inadequate. This new one isn't ideal, but it's a million times better. If you can think of a way to make things better then I want to hear it.

[0]: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-48095118

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#385
post #27

Jon Pretty sounds like a complete creep and yes, based on this account, a predator. That being said, there is a court and criminal justice system for a reason. While I empathize with the author, and utterly despise the archetype of high-status men who use their status within programming communities as a tool to target women, I find the nature of these kinds of posts to be counterproductive. Therapeutic to the author?…

It's a bit strange that you claim that the proper venue for this sort of thing is the justice system, but then relate a story where your brother for some reason did not avail himself of the justice system to right a wrong against him.

And that just rams the point home: often the justice system doesn't help, and actively hurts. If he'd brought suit against his former employer for terminating him, even if he won, he would have gained a reputation in his field for being litigious toward employers, and that would have greatly hurt his future employment prospects.

So maybe, just maybe, there are reasons the justice system isn't going to work so well in this situation either.

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#386
post #20

similar stories are emerging: - https://killnicole.github.io/statement/ (edit i see she has added it to the article itself) - https://twitter.com/brianclapper/status/1387115214064193537?... - https://twitter.com/adelbertchang/status/1387090351626723329... there seems to be some coordination here, as this came out pretty much at the same time. https://typelevel.org/blog/2021/04/27/community-safety.html Yifan also link…

Sometimes character assassination is coordinated. I personally only slightly increase the probability of something being true when multiple accusers come forward. I still want to see proof. What if a bunch of your ex-girlfriends or ex-boyfriends got together and decided to ruin your life with accusations?

Seriously? How often does this happen? Unless you are a terrible person, I doubt anyone would try to ruin someone's life like this.

This lady seems to have her head screwed on. Her post doesn't seem to me like she's trying to cause a witch hunt and it seems like she's sharing her story in a logical and sensible manner.

I'll gladly read the post from another woman defending John Pretty, but I doubt that's going to be forthcoming.

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#387

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The article notes that 2-8% of rape cases are PROVEN false. The real number is definitely higher than that as people do go to prison under wrongful conviction. Bottom line is if you don’t have compelling evidence for a crime you don’t have a case. That’s a good thing as it protects us from unjust punishment most of the time. It’s real sad that victims that can’t prove their case don’t have justice but it’s much more…

It doesn't actually say that. The article cited[0] is a review of analysis from ~1980 to 2005. If you restrict yourself to only analysis that don't count cases involving alcohol as false reports, the number drops to 2-3%. The article also notes that false reports are usually different from real reports, important among these facts is that false reports are often attention seeking, and so are examples of what society…

This doesn’t seem very scientific. You can’t determine if someone is lying based on them “seeming like an attention seeker or not” deductive reasoning in a legal system demands “beyond a shadow of a doubt” certainty before convictions are made.

Also no it’s pretty cut and dry: if you punish someone who is innocent under ANY circumstance without reviewing the case under a very critical eye you might as well throw out the justice system entirely, break out the torches and pitchforks and start gathering wood for the witch burning.

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#388
post #20

similar stories are emerging: - https://killnicole.github.io/statement/ (edit i see she has added it to the article itself) - https://twitter.com/brianclapper/status/1387115214064193537?... - https://twitter.com/adelbertchang/status/1387090351626723329... there seems to be some coordination here, as this came out pretty much at the same time. https://typelevel.org/blog/2021/04/27/community-safety.html Yifan also link…

Sometimes character assassination is coordinated. I personally only slightly increase the probability of something being true when multiple accusers come forward. I still want to see proof. What if a bunch of your ex-girlfriends or ex-boyfriends got together and decided to ruin your life with accusations?

Bummed I had to scroll this far into the thread to see some reason.

This is horrifying if it did happen but I don't know Yifan and I don't know Jon Pretty nor the trustworthiness of either.

It's disturbing to see HN readers jump to conclusions so quickly without proper evidence. If we continue to reduce our capacity for assessment of a situation to individual anecdotal accounts what kind of world will we live in 5 years from now?

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#389
post #198

This may be a tone-deaf sidetrack but also perhaps an important piece of advice for some. There should be an impenetrable barrier between ones love life and ones professional life. While there are certainly people who have met their significant other in a professional setting, there are much better ways of doing that, especially nowadays. By striving to keep this separation water tight we can avoid both unwanted adva…

This is probably good advice but if people are spending more and more of their time at work and work starts becoming half of their life, with outings with coworkers, bosses being your friend and not just your boss, then where can you meet people exactly?

You can't honestly demand both that people be disconnected from their coworkers and that they make work be 90% of their life. One part has to give (preferably the latter part).

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#390
post #339

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The court -- rightly -- sets a very high bar to conviction, and police and prosecutors often won't even attempt it unless the evidence is overwhelming. Huh? Have you ever heard of the Central Park Five? Google "Central Park Five" and you'll have a more enlightened view!

The Central Park five voluntarily confessed and were almost certainly guilty. The only issue was that there was a sixth perpetrator who had raped the victim after and wasn’t caught at the time.

"Almost certainly guilty," huh? Citations please? Are you talking about a DIFFERENT "Central Park Five" than the ones who were exonerated? Or are you just ironically quoting Trump? Do you agree with him that hate is what we need if we're gonna get something done?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Central_Park_jogger_case

>From the outset the case was a topic of national interest, with the commentary on social issues evolving as the details emerged. Initially, the case led to public discourse about New York City's perceived lawlessness, criminal behavior by youths, and violence toward women. After the exonerations, it became a high-profile example of racial profiling, discrimination, and inequality in the media and legal system. All five defendants subsequently sued the City of New York for malicious prosecution, racial discrimination and emotional distress; the City settled the suit in 2014 for $41 million.

https://www.pbs.org/kenburns/the-central-park-five/convictio...

>On December 19, 2002, Justice Charles J. Tejada of the Supreme Court of the State of New York granted a motion to vacate the thirteen-year-old convections in the infamous case. He did so based on new evidence: a shocking confession from a serial rapist, Matias Reyes, and a positive DNA match to back it up. A year later, the men filed civil lawsuits against the City of New York, and the police officers and prosecutors who had worked toward their conviction. In 2014, they settled that civil case for $41 million dollars. Despite their exoneration, the police and prosecutors involved in the case maintain that they were guilty of the crime.

https://www.bbc.com/news/newsbeat-48609693

>Five black and Hispanic boys, aged between 14 and 16, would be found guilty and jailed for the crime.

>They became known as the Central Park Five.

>But they never committed the crime.

[...]

>The role of Donald Trump

>New York in the 80s and 90s was much more dangerous than it is today.

>Race relations were strained - especially when it came to the police.

>Meanwhile, Donald Trump - then a New York property mogul - seemed convinced the teens were guilty.

>He spent a reported $85,000 (around £138,000 today) on four full-page adverts in New York newspapers titled: "Bring Back The Death Penalty, Bring Back Our Police!".

>He wrote: "I want to hate these murderers and I always will. I am not looking to psychoanalyse or understand them, I am looking to punish them."

>In an interview with CNN at the time, he said: "Maybe hate is what we need if we're gonna get something done."

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