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How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

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Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#71

Post by lambda_obrien »

fairity wrote: post #23
gbrown wrote: post #17

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I was talking with my brother about this, and he called it “intellectual hedonism”. Never really thought about it that way, but it’s not entirely incorrect.

I've thought about this a bit and came to the same conclusion. Most people who value self-growth are ultimately doing so as a means to achieve vain values. That is, the reason you want to continue growing is because you want to be better than others, or build wealth or status. You may trick your mind into thinking you genuinely enjoy self-improvement, but I've found that the moment to moment experience of self-improv…

I realized recently that I enjoy learning new programming languages, not even using them sometimes. I'll read all the tutorials and documentation, get it running on my PC, then find a new language I like more later and dump this one. Is that hedonistic, such that I learn simply for the joy of learning, and probably forget a lot of what I learned later? If so, then am I deluding myself into doing so for others somehow, even though no one who knows me as a person even cares about programming languages or knows that I am into them?

Frankly speaking, your comment comes off a bit dickish to me, especially this part:

> You may trick your mind into thinking you genuinely enjoy self-improvement

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#72

Post by [deleted] »

mgolawala wrote: post #19
georgeecollins wrote: post #9

I really like this point of view, but it is important to point out that the bar for happiness in life and relationships (as a proxy for "reproduction) is way below our aspirations. You aren't really trying to be like Instagram influenceres because of your "selfish gene". Your "selfish gene" would do better directing you toward fundamentalist communities where reproductive rates are higher. No, you are being influence…

Hasn't Human nature itself been crafted by evolutionary forces? It is conceivable that our ancestors that were more laid back and content were more likely to be out competed by those who were hungry for power and prestige. In fact, as an example, isn't there some often quoted statistic about half a percentage of all living humans having descended from Genghis Khan?

[deleted]

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#73

Post by broberts01 »

birdsbirdsbirds wrote: post #26

This article is not about escaping the rat race but about winning it. Reinvesting and having long-term goals is just the best strategy to make the most. It's kind of doubling down on the rat race. The status game is actually a valid strategy since, unlike developers, most people don't live in a merit-based society. Strong people associate with strong people. So whoever needs resources also has to appear strong. For n…

> The easiest way to escape the rat race is to keep racing

I don't think that is how it works.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#74

Post by ErikAugust »

georgeecollins wrote: post #9

I really like this point of view, but it is important to point out that the bar for happiness in life and relationships (as a proxy for "reproduction) is way below our aspirations. You aren't really trying to be like Instagram influenceres because of your "selfish gene". Your "selfish gene" would do better directing you toward fundamentalist communities where reproductive rates are higher. No, you are being influence…

Very likely you are being heavily influenced by the media when you consider the average American, for example, consumes eight hours of it a day:

https://www.eaj.io/eight-hours-a-day/

Sleep, Work, Consume Media...

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#75

Post by offtop5 »

saiya-jin wrote: post #62
offtop5 wrote: post #41

>The extra you’re paying for a Porche, for example, has more to do with the message you want to convey to others, not with the usefulness of the product itself. One of my best friends, who does better dating wise than anyone I know, drove a 98 Volvo. He was making well over 150k, but had so much quiet confidence he had no need to project anything. I make a similar amount, still wear clothes from Old Navy and when I d…

I got an issue with this common trope about fast cars bought only by clueless folks who compensate their messed up childhood or rather small body parts in some way. Have you guys actually properly driven (ideally on track) proper race-ish car? Porsche has several models which are kind of you can take on normal roads for long drives and drive race track with great success/fun. Basically 911s above 400 hp with rear whe…

If you can buy it cash , go for it.

I'm talking about the folks who finance cars they have no real capacity to afford. They aren't taking these cars to the track.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#76

Post by malinens »

1996 wrote: post #59
claudiulodro wrote: post #49

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Long term ramifications like the continued survival of the human race or a working economy when you're old and retired? It's in society's best interest that a reasonable amount of children are born each year.

You certainly know the concept of externalities, like pollution. If you don't, it's like how fixing your car exhaust brings you very little personal benefits. But if nobody did, smog would make your life miserable. Kids are just the same - except the other way around! So personally, when I'm old and retired, I plan to depend on the work your kids (and the kids of other people who also generously considered the "conti…

This can backfire for you later. Read about what older people think about life choices... rarely who say they are glad they don't have children...

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#77

Post by Cloudef »

st1x7 wrote: post #48

It's ironic that the image of a rat race that came into my head after reading the title was exactly what the author proposes as an alternative at the end of the article - comparing yourself to others and constantly trying to upgrade your skills and yourself.

I think the author should read The Egyptian by Mika Waltari

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#78

Post by georgeecollins »

lotsofpulp wrote: post #29
war1025 wrote: post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> No, you are being influenced by media, which convinces you that things are a proxy for happiness and good relationships The Fight Club line has always really resonated with me: "We work jobs we hate to buy shit we don't need" Live below your means. Tune out from all the consumerism. Suddenly you find that you have enough savings built up that you could support yourself for multiple years without working. Now you ar…

This works without kids. If you have kids, then typically you desire to give them the best available options, and that then means living in higher priced neighborhoods with higher achieving student populations. And then your kid befriends another kid whose parents are doctors/lawyers/engineers/business owners, and they want to don vacation or camp with them and you need to pony up a few hundred or thousand dollars an…

As a parent I have experienced that people always try to guilt you into spending too much on your kid. Too much for education, too much for health, too much for entertainment and enrichment. Because you love them, and it isn't you, it is hard to know where the line is. So people exploit you ruthlessly.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#79

Post by fairity »

lambda_obrien wrote: post #71
fairity wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've thought about this a bit and came to the same conclusion. Most people who value self-growth are ultimately doing so as a means to achieve vain values. That is, the reason you want to continue growing is because you want to be better than others, or build wealth or status. You may trick your mind into thinking you genuinely enjoy self-improvement, but I've found that the moment to moment experience of self-improv…

I realized recently that I enjoy learning new programming languages, not even using them sometimes. I'll read all the tutorials and documentation, get it running on my PC, then find a new language I like more later and dump this one. Is that hedonistic, such that I learn simply for the joy of learning, and probably forget a lot of what I learned later? If so, then am I deluding myself into doing so for others somehow…

> Frankly speaking, your comment comes off a bit dickish to me, especially this part:

Appreciate the feedback. I'm not trying to be a dick. I should have replaced "you" with "I" in my response.

For those who've found themselves stuck in the rat race, including myself, I think it's important to answer the question: Why is wealth and social status a poor value system?

My answer is: because wealth and social status are largely outside of my control.

Put another way, values are only bad insofar as they are hard to achieve.

Ok, then, the question is: What are better values than wealth and social status?

In my search for an answer to this question, I read Carol Dweck's book "Growth Mindset" where she argues that self-growth, in of itself, is a worthwhile value.

At first, I was convinced. Aha, I just need to value growth. Then, I will have motivation to engage in all these challenging activities AND I have a value that is entirely within my control (which makes it a good value). After all, I can grow as a person without fail.

Alas, after further reflection and trying to adopt this mindset, I realized that valuing self-growth, for me, was just a way of hiding from my true values: wealth and social status. That is, no matter how hard I tried to focus on growth as an end in of itself, I was always secretly still chasing after wealth and social status. Self-growth, for me, was just a way to disguise rat-race values. Put another way, Dweck's school of psychology tries to train you to focus on the means instead of the ends.

In order to escape the rat race, I believe you have to truly replace your old values with intrinsic values that are 1) ends in of themselves and 2) within your control.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#80

Post by offtop5 »

lotsofpulp wrote: post #70
offtop5 wrote: post #41

>The extra you’re paying for a Porche, for example, has more to do with the message you want to convey to others, not with the usefulness of the product itself. One of my best friends, who does better dating wise than anyone I know, drove a 98 Volvo. He was making well over 150k, but had so much quiet confidence he had no need to project anything. I make a similar amount, still wear clothes from Old Navy and when I d…

Perhaps you and your friend are status signaling by signaling you don't have to status signal.

Have an upvote. This might be my favorite hn comment ever.
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