Earlier quoted context omitted.
i dont think her sex has anything to do with it. its a company culture thing. in some cultures interrupting is necessary to get heard even at the slightest, while at others people will outcast you as a 'different to work with'. in her next job, stuff might be totally different i've been in both cultures.
What makes you discount the role of sex? Honestly curious - it’s pervasive in workplace treatment issues across the gamut, but you discount it here? Why?
You Talkin’ to Me? The Unruly History of New York English
61–70 of 80 posts
Re: You Talkin’ to Me? The Unruly History of New York English
#62"Cooperative overlap" -- I didn't know that there was a term for this! I've lived in NYC for my entire life (with the exception of my undergraduate), and it's something I've always noticed about my conversations with "native" friends versus transplants and friends from out-of-state.
As a born and raised New Yorker, I have lived this concept my whole life, and never knew the name for it either.
Re: You Talkin’ to Me? The Unruly History of New York English
#63Growing up in the Midwest I took a job with a Midwestern tech company that had a LOT of east coast banks as customers. Some folks would warn you that when you talked to them they're "really rude" but others would tell you that they sound harsh, but actually are really nice. It was a curious mix of warnings, and for the most part I certainly noticed the accent and different patterns, but didn't think twice about it. T…
My wife would be very quick to tell you that it would have gone very differently if a woman did the same thing. I've heard numerous stories where she didn't talk like that and nobody would listen to her. And I've heard the other stories where she did talk like that and got complaints from the other employees and ended up being talked to by her boss, even though she was correct and got stuff done. So while it's nice t…
Some behaviors can be both correct and make people uncomfortable. Of course this mechanic is also “gendered” in the sense that women would probably be less inclined to dismiss said feedback due to a lifetime of being raised as people pleasers (obviously not all women/cultures/etc), but this may be a place where it makes sense to undo some of that training and say, “if what I say is correct and useful, their discomfort with my speaking up is a problem for them to deal with.”
Re: You Talkin’ to Me? The Unruly History of New York English
#64The interaction pattern is still the same though. I'm from New Jersey and (under normal, non-COVID circumstances) work in New York, and interrupting in conversation is taken as pretty natural.
Re: You Talkin’ to Me? The Unruly History of New York English
#65Earlier quoted context omitted.
In South Africa we will often say "hello" and "how are you?" before ordering, no exaggeration.
Sounds like UK - I've heard people use "you're alright mate?" Before just proceeding with the order as normal
Re: You Talkin’ to Me? The Unruly History of New York English
#66> In dissecting the exaggerated New York accents of Bugs Bunny When I was a little kid in the 60s, I remember someone interviewing Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs). He couldn’t decide whether a Bronx or Brooklyn accent sounded tougher, so he chose elements of both for Bugs’ voice. Having grown up in CT, it was the first time I realized there were different regional accents even among the different NYC boroughs.
The UK, famously, has this too. There are numerous accents present which have very small and clear boundaries. You can hear different accents after walking only a mile or two away to the next village, or the other half of a city. Oddly fascinating, and something I really miss now I've moved to a different country - a country which to my ears sounds very much like there are only a couple of accents.
A couple Brits I work with say it's pretty good.
Re: You Talkin’ to Me? The Unruly History of New York English
#67Growing up in the Midwest I took a job with a Midwestern tech company that had a LOT of east coast banks as customers. Some folks would warn you that when you talked to them they're "really rude" but others would tell you that they sound harsh, but actually are really nice. It was a curious mix of warnings, and for the most part I certainly noticed the accent and different patterns, but didn't think twice about it. T…
My wife would be very quick to tell you that it would have gone very differently if a woman did the same thing. I've heard numerous stories where she didn't talk like that and nobody would listen to her. And I've heard the other stories where she did talk like that and got complaints from the other employees and ended up being talked to by her boss, even though she was correct and got stuff done. So while it's nice t…
There was one woman who worked at that place. She was super smart and way senior compared to me.
She'd call me over and I'd pretend to be her manager from time to time.... the moment I said the same thing she did, they'd accept it.
Sometimes I didn't even know what she was asking me to say, she'd just sigh and hand me a piece of paper and I'd read it to them...
Re: You Talkin’ to Me? The Unruly History of New York English
#68Earlier quoted context omitted.
Sounds like UK - I've heard people use "you're alright mate?" Before just proceeding with the order as normal
I see/hear that a bit in some British panel shows that I enjoy; the host and sidekick will start with "You alright?" as a general intro phrase.
"Alright?"
"Alright."
Re: You Talkin’ to Me? The Unruly History of New York English
#69Yeah, regional American accents are dying, unfortunately. I think they added a lot of color to dialog in the U.S. My own grandfather grew up in the Appalachians during the Great Depression and has to this day the thickest accent and the funniest idioms. But with each generation after him the accent has worn off more and more. When you go to NYC you kinda hope to run into these old school New Yorkers and have them tur…
I don't have the exact source but I believe research has shown the opposite. When cable television started becoming more common about 20 years ago, there was a belief that a common "source accent" would flatten out regional differences in accents. Apparently, it has made accents more distinct as people, consciously or not, were using those accents as a "tribal marker" to differentiate themselves from the rest of the country.
On a broader note, I remember reading an OpEd in the late 90's that predicted that because people were going to be getting all of their information from a common source (aka the Internet) that it would eliminate debates between regions of the US. The idea was that with shared common information, we would all have shared beliefs. Obviously, this completely missed the ball with regards to personalized streams of information (e.g. Netflix, Pandora etc).