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Tech firms face growing resentment of parent employees during Covid-19

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Re: Tech firms face growing resentment of parent employees during Covid-19

#551

Post by jajsd3udf »

Shivetya wrote: post #23

Isn't it just bizarre how people can have children and not expect it to disrupt their lives. They are children, they require your engagement, this is part of the deal. Tech companies should offer the same time off to all employees whether they have children or not. Children should not be allowed to be bargaining chip to obtain more from others. Your choice. To be honest having children out weighs any negative impact…

Actually this is a great point: give everyone enough time off/benefits so that they could have children if they really want to, or they could use that time/benefits in other ways. In this scenario, everyone would make their decision whether to have children irrespective of calculations about benefits. Of course today's reality is that some people may question whether they can afford to have children, rather than whether they get enough back from society for the trouble.

Re: Tech firms face growing resentment of parent employees during Covid-19

#552

Post by baddox »

gus_massa wrote: post #223
falcolas wrote: post #171

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> the "resentment" of those without children have for "benefits" those with children get strikes me as extremely selfish, immature and displaying a total lack of empathy. Unpopular opinion: We should not be rewarding or elevating people for having unprotected sex without the support network to take care of their children in the event they are unable to attend school. There's a thousand reasons a child might not be ab…

We had a 24 hours electricity outage last week. (Some problem with an electric wire in the whole block after a heavy rain). Should I buy an electricity generator just in case? I expect to be able to send the kids to school, perhaps at least a few hours per day. It is impossible now. An in case the school is not working, I can send them with one of the grandmas or the other. But we are currently in the peak of the pan…

What do parents do during the summer or before public schooling starts? I've always heard controversy about parental leave, but why haven't I heard as much controversy about parents spending less time at work when their children are very young or during the summer?

Re: Tech firms face growing resentment of parent employees during Covid-19

#553

Post by [deleted] »

treeman79 wrote: post #44
codemac wrote: post #5

Personally, I struggle with these feelings as well. It seems nuts that someone working 50%+ less than someone else is going to keep all the same equity, vacation, and salary. Then again it seems nuts that they don't. All employees who had children or family members to care for before or after COVID get none of the same support. I don't think backpay is coming for those who were forced to take leave or even quit their…

Have small elementary age kids. It’s rough. 8-10 interruptions the first couple hours of work. Then meltdown over being hungry. Then afternoon interruptions because they are bored. Lots of crappy reasons, but also because they want me to spend time with them. Also dealing with my own chronic illness. I was managing to cope/hide before Covid. Between it all is a sense of guilt of not getting enough done for work and n…

[deleted]

Re: Tech firms face growing resentment of parent employees during Covid-19

#554

Post by wonderwonder »

dheera wrote: post #491
wonderwonder wrote: post #424

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I would posit that no one should be working until 11 and everyone should be comfortable saying its 6pm, I'm going home. It's not the parents fault there is resentment its everyone else's for allowing themselves to be abused into working until 11. We turn on each other when we should really be focused on those making us work the late hours.

Yep, this is exactly what I proposed in the first line of my comment :-/ Yet HN people are downvoting me to oblivion, yet again, for proposing a reasonable solution: "legally-protected personal time". I guess they all enjoy working till 11pm.

You are right, I misread your post. My apologies.

Re: Tech firms face growing resentment of parent employees during Covid-19

#555

Post by jajsd3udf »

thursday0987 wrote: post #205
wayneftw wrote: post #153

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I’ve always thought that people should need to get a license to have a baby. You need a license to pull fish out of a river or to plant bamboo in your own yard, but any moron is allowed to make new people. How does that make any sense? With a baby license, hopefully we would actually only make new sane, healthy people - currently that’s not happening because the world is chock full of unhealthy idiots that I don’t wa…

> I’ve always thought that people should need to get a license to have a baby. what a perfect idea! Then Trump could sign an executive order saying "no licenses for black people" and bam - racism is solved forever. /s (obviously)

I know it's not your main point, but this kind of simplistic reasoning that "racism = Trump" is precisely what white privilege/ignorance is about.

Re: Tech firms face growing resentment of parent employees during Covid-19

#556

Post by mike_d »

recursive wrote: post #536
mike_d wrote: post #524

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That is called life. There is no vacation when you have a sick spouse, or bought a new house, or are in a car accident. Your job shouldn't be your break, regardless of your situation. My wife is at a FAANG company currently covering for 4 people who all get double digit weeks off because they chose to have children. Does she get any time off for literally working 18 hour days 7 days a week? No of course not.

> Your job shouldn't be your break, regardless of your situation. If it's less stressful that the ambient level in your life, then it's a break. Why shouldn't it be?

If your day-to-day life is that stressful, I strongly encourage you to reach out to the National Parent Helpline at 1-855-427-2736.

Re: Tech firms face growing resentment of parent employees during Covid-19

#557

Post by duutfhhh »

wayneftw wrote: post #153
tbatchelli wrote: post #57

How much of this issue is related to having a part of the population think that people having children is solely a private question? "You had children, why should I bear your burden!" If none of us had children there would d be no economy to support anyone's life in, let's say, 40 years from now. People making and raising new sane and healthy people should be considered a social and common good, for the sake of all,…

I’ve always thought that people should need to get a license to have a baby. You need a license to pull fish out of a river or to plant bamboo in your own yard, but any moron is allowed to make new people. How does that make any sense? With a baby license, hopefully we would actually only make new sane, healthy people - currently that’s not happening because the world is chock full of unhealthy idiots that I don’t wa…

With yearly renewal fees. And if parents fail to renew license, it becomes illegal for their children to walk on public roads.

Re: Tech firms face growing resentment of parent employees during Covid-19

#559

Post by triceratops »

nicbou wrote: post #312
jdm2212 wrote: post #274

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Someone has to provide the goods and services you'll consume when you're old. Those people are today's kids, whose parents are doing you a big favor at considerable expense to themselves. Raising children isn't like smoking, a hobby, a side hustle, or other miscellaneous personal obligations. It's more like military service and jury duty -- an essential service that some people perform to ensure that society as we kn…

Then is it cool if I skip a few meetings to volunteer to help the homeless? We already heavily subsidise child-rearing through taxes and other benefits. As I said elsewhere, there are mechanisms for supporting parents already. If you tried to let any other charitable endeavour take over your work schedule, you wouldn't expect your compensation to remain unaffected. I'm not resentful at parents. It just seems complete…

> Then is it cool if I skip a few meetings to volunteer to help the homeless?

A lot of companies will happily let you do that. Microsoft and Google even donate in $ for every hour you volunteer, up to a certain limit.

Re: Tech firms face growing resentment of parent employees during Covid-19

#560

Post by shard972 »

hn_throwaway_99 wrote: post #4

I am a middle-aged adult with no children who's worked at tech firms for the past couple decades. To be honest, the "resentment" of those without children have for "benefits" those with children get strikes me as extremely selfish, immature and displaying a total lack of empathy. This is time off specifically to take care of children, something now that has become exceedingly more difficult in Covid times. What's nex…

> If anything, I'm thankful for all those people with kids who will (a) take care of the continuation of the human race, and more selfishly (b) support our society and economy when I am too old to do so.

You forget that plenty of young people don't want to support either of these things when it comes to certain demographics.

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