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I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

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Re: I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

#421

Earlier quoted context omitted.

While some of what you are writing is probably true, a work day (especially pre-COVID), really takes up a lot more than 8hrs. If you live in a city and want to live somewhere affordable, you're often looking at 1hr+ of commute each way. You have to get up a little early to prep for the day. Some jobs don't count a lunch break towards your 8hr day, or expect you to stay later, so you end up working more like 9hrs. If…

> If you live in a city and want to live somewhere affordable, you're often looking at 1hr+ of commute each way. Reading your comment and others beneath you, I sense many of you have a weird idea of what a city is. What you describe is true only for a minority of cities. I live in a city with above median housing prices. I live a 10 minute drive from my work. My house is not expensive - in fact, the expensive neighbo…

In countries like Australia, cities like that are defacto the majority. Sydney/Melbourne are both easily 1hr+ communes unless your loaded or willing to live in a dump (I used to do 3 hour commutes from my parents place, total 6 hour a day travel).

Cities like perth are much closer to achieving less than 1hr commute without paying expensive property prices but that is by definition the minority, even Brisbane isn't that great.

Re: I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

#422
post #398

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My personal mantra at work is: One useful thing per day. If I manage to do one useful thing every day, it adds up to a lot of useful things over time. And that has proven to be enough. There's a sort of mediocre Johnny Cash song with the chorus "Even I might get to Heaven at a half a mile a day" That's basically how I try to live my life.

The speed still matters somehow. Well, take Johnny Cash. Half a mile a day * 30k days gives 15k miles; maybe it's enough to reach heaven, but not enough to e.g. reach the Moon. So, when choosing to move steadily albeit slowly, you have to manage your expectations, and get used to get by with little. Investing your time is not unlike investing your money: least risky strategies bring most stable but least spectacular…

> while big bets bring both big gains and big losses.

it's actually an asymmetric. The losses a capped - you cannot lose more than you own, and you cannot lose more than the time you put in (which is, of course, something you're going to lose by living any way). Technically, you also lose the "risk free reward" in opportunity cost - e.g., a minimum wage job.

The gains, however, are unlimited. For both yourself, and for society. So i think it's in the interest of society to make many of these "big bets".

Re: I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

#423

I was incredibly driven about 7 years ago... I was a founder of a startup and had really lofty aspirations. I told my wife that it was very possible that we would be millionaires by the time we hit 40. Fast forward to today and that did not happen. The startup is no more, but mainly due to burnout. We made money and did well, but not well enough. I never made my millions, but did have a substantial aqui-hire opportun…

Compounding outcomes. Someone who consistently gets just a little better every day is more likely to succeed than someone who works insanely hard for just a limited period of time. The years don't come without the days.

> just a little better every day is more likely to succeed than someone who works insanely hard for just a limited period of time

but someone who works insanely hard for a long time is going to beat the person who gets just a little bit better each day.

The point is, someone who works insanely hard gets to a certain required level quicker than someone who improves a tiny bit every day for a long time. Think cramming for an exam etc.

Re: I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

#424

I was incredibly driven about 7 years ago... I was a founder of a startup and had really lofty aspirations. I told my wife that it was very possible that we would be millionaires by the time we hit 40. Fast forward to today and that did not happen. The startup is no more, but mainly due to burnout. We made money and did well, but not well enough. I never made my millions, but did have a substantial aqui-hire opportun…

My personal mantra at work is: One useful thing per day. If I manage to do one useful thing every day, it adds up to a lot of useful things over time. And that has proven to be enough. There's a sort of mediocre Johnny Cash song with the chorus "Even I might get to Heaven at a half a mile a day" That's basically how I try to live my life.

I call it "one thing at a time, all the time".

Not because I want to take it slowly, but because I have a lot on my plate and my natural tendency is to "unflatten time", fast-forwarding in my head all the different plays and things to do. Some of these will only apply in a year, but here I am thinking about them and worrying about them now. Worse still, I sometime make decisions related to these future things and as you all surely know, decisions are paid for with a mental toll.

So I dial back, focus on the immediate thing in front of me and remember that nearly any progress is made of trivial, tiny chunks.

Having an effective system of writing stuff down is key to that approach - your future ideas and various pending tasks need to spill into writing instead of lingering around your head. When you have a good writing system you can trust, then you can free your mind to focus on the now.

Re: I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

#425

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> It's not uncommon for new grad SWEs to complain that an 8-hour work day is somehow consuming 100% of their weekday hours. I don't know man, I've been struggling with this myself. Obviously it's not literally true, but the problem is that after you account for 8 hours of sleep, 8 hours of work and chores/eating/hygiene/cooking/commute, every thing you want to do starts seriously cutting into the time that's left. Ne…

I hear you, but I'll tell you what I tell my mentees: Most of it distills down to being honest about your priorities. If you value relaxed mornings, relaxed evenings, and never feeling rushed before or after work, then there's nothing wrong with that. You're not obligated to go out with friends or allocate hours to hobbies during the weekday. The problem comes when people say they value one thing, but when decision t…

Something that's worked well for me is trying to prolong the time each day before I get in front of a screen. Right now it's 1.30 on a Sunday and I've had a productive morning because I didn't plonk down in front of the computer after I go up and showered.

As I've become more conscious of the benefits of making that effort, it's also become a bit easier to 'break' the day's first internet surfing time. Immediately after this post I'm getting back off my ass to do some yard work.

YMMV, but it worked well for me as a focus to reduce pointless browsing hours.

Re: I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

#426

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The dream is so far out of reach, it doesn't even exist. Yet we chase the money anyways. Thank you for explaining.

Many people chase money just to chase money, because they think that it will make their life wonderful. And many of them are disappointed when they get money (if they do), because it didn't make their life suddenly wonderful. I think that's the point you're trying to make, and it's a valid one. But you're making it in such an extreme way that it makes you sound completely disconnected from reality. I can want a nicer…

Yeah I think you’ve got it. At a certain point the happiness returns on money are marginal. And it’s easy uk fall into a trap of “I need more”.

But if you have a humble mind, are a bit frugal, and build something that not only you but the ones you live can enjoy, having a solid base of wealth is really lovely.

Re: I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

#427
post #395

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Noone posts about how their startup exploded and took 5 years of savings in their prime money earning years.

Are you suggesting that your twenties are prime money earning years? I know that for me my earnings have only gone up over time.

Earnings go up, but so do expenses and responsibilities for most people.

And would your earnings be where they are now if you had a big gap in your twenties where you did a failed startup? (Depends on the experience it gave you, I guess.)

Re: I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

#428
post #423

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Compounding outcomes. Someone who consistently gets just a little better every day is more likely to succeed than someone who works insanely hard for just a limited period of time. The years don't come without the days.

> just a little better every day is more likely to succeed than someone who works insanely hard for just a limited period of time but someone who works insanely hard for a long time is going to beat the person who gets just a little bit better each day. The point is, someone who works insanely hard gets to a certain required level quicker than someone who improves a tiny bit every day for a long time. Think cramming…

but someone who works insanely hard for a long time is always walking that fine line of burnout.

Re: I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

#429
As a fellow thirty-five year old, when I think about this type of stuff, I often think about that Tyler Durden quote from Fight Club.

"We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock start, but we won't. And we're slowly learning that face. And we're very, very pissed off."

We'll its silly to think you will be bestowed a spot in the top 1%, let alone the top 1% of 1%. I too slaved my twenties chasing the startup dream. I had some moderate success, but ultimately nothing panned out. I said I'd give that all up when I turned thirty if I never made it big. I did that. When I was 30, I had left the country once, to Mexico. At thirty-five I've traveled to ten countries. I started writing a novel. I don't expect to finish before forty and that's okay. I really turned my focus inward. Something that I do have absolute control over. With the pandemic I started contributing to open source software, I stared yoga. I should probably be doing more, but doing something is a good start. I am not saying not to chase big dreams at all, but sometimes we pivot in startups and we pivot in life.

I am probably the happiest I've been since my mid-twenties right now. That doesn't mean I am in some state of nirvana. I still have a lot of issues and my twenties end really, really bad. But I'm in a good place for me. All in the midst of a pandemic. I controlled what I could. I'm debt free. I have my little open source side projects. I ride the bike, write the code, ride the bike, write the code and occasionally add some words to my little masturbation novel I'm writing. I could lose my job today and not give a fuck and not need to work for two years. I'm pretty happy with all that.

Re: I thought I would have accomplished a lot more today and also before I was 35

#430
post #384
post #332

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I’d assume the parent comment is alluding to FAANG or some of the hotter software startups.

I'd be very surprised if most FAANG engineers aren't millionaires after 5-10 years. The caveat being that houses in the Bay Area cost a lot more than a million...

One of my buddies who works at Google basically lives in a hacker commune so he can pocket most of his earnings post tax. Not sure quite what he does with it.
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