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Ask HN: Are you ok?

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Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#721

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Start your own business, work fewer hours, and take the cut in pay. That's what I did, and I have no regrets. It's the best decision I ever made.

I stalked you a little based on that comment, and I can't figure out what it is you really do. You must be living a good life if you've got time to maintain a toy programming language ( https://github.com/kerkeslager/fur ), and you must be able to pick your work carefully if you're so passionate about GPL, which I can respect. But how do you make money? And how did you get started? I'd be concerned about losing healt…

I don't think I'm really ready to give you the keys to life or anything. I'm happy with where I'm at, but it's certainly not perfect and it wouldn't work for everyone. I'll answer your questions, though.

> But how do you make money?

I do web development, mostly. I mostly ensure that I have work by undercharging for my services ($80/hour, which is pretty competitive for a Python developer with 10+ years of experience, 6ish of them in Python). I have low expenses because I live without some comforts (I live in a shared rental). I drive a 1996 Toyota Tacoma with 248K miles on it. I rock climb. It's not an extraordinary life, but it's mine and I like it.

> And how did you get started?

Parted ways on fairly good terms with my last salary job, without any real plan.

> I'd be concerned about losing health insurance or draining savings while losing the opportunity cost of employment.

Not to nitpick semantics, but you're currently paying the "opportunity costs" of employment. The opportunity costs of employment are what you lose by being employed, not the other way around.

Health insurance is literally my biggest expense, more than rent, and I'm a healthy 32 year old guy. The US is not a good place to be a human with a fallible body. What can I say, it's a risk. Plan for health insurance in your savings. Ultimately, not being in the US is probably the best idea--we're the only first world country with a third world healthcare system.

> How sure were you that your plan would work before you took the leap?

Not sure at all. It hasn't always "worked", either, I worked at a coffee shop and drove recycling to the dump for some local businesses, did landscaping, pet watching. I've never starved, never had to borrow money from friends or family. But I'm still not sure.

Your boss could lay you off tomorrow. Tomorrow's Friday, that's when they lay people off. There's certainly a risk in branching off on your own, but don't underestimate the risk of doing the same thing you've always done.

Probably you'll be okay no matter what choice you make, even if it's a mistake. It's just your finances. Your finances matter, but there are more important things.

EDIT: I'm passionate about the GPL, but can't really afford to be Richard Stallman about it. The reason I license my free software under the GPL is that I want it to push humanity forward, not get locked off in private codebases. But that's what I do on my free time, not what I do for work. I'd love to get paid to write GPL code and maybe some day I will, but most of the code I write is closed source for companies. Maybe that makes me a hypocrite--I like to think it makes me pragmatic.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#722

Nth-ing no social life and the related whines. I hate the mild feeling of discomfort I get when I tell most people I'm a software engineer. I hate having eclectic or traditional "nerdy" interests and getting a similar reaction. I've been enjoying Classic, and I have a small online circle for the niche games/music/art I like. I hate that I like these things in spite of the detriment to my social benefit to liking them…

> I have no interest in turning off that part of my brain so I can fit into the sportsfan stereotype or netflix-watcher or chronic-substance-abuser or extremely-self-improving-gogetter. I think you just need to find more interesting people to talk to. It's them, not you. Reminds me of a quote I found helpful: "Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure you are not, in fact, just…

That quote is fantastic, and very true in my limited anecdotal experience

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#723
Not really. I love to work as software engineer but I'm already feeling negative side effects of the stress related to the profession. Having to seat for 8h a day doing intellectual work doesn't seem to be healthy because often you start to force yourself to remain productive after the first hours (and then comes the frustration). Sometimes I wonder if I should have done something else, with a lower salary but having a healthier life both physically and mentally.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#724

I'm shocked at how many people seem to be doing OK or have minor complaints. For me, I've realized that if I have to do anything for 40+ hours a week on a schedule, after a couple of weeks, I'd prefer being dead. I could be a professional ice cream taste tester or race car driver, and after about 3 weeks of showing up at a fixed time and putting in 8 hours, I'd still be ready to off myself again. When I have week-lon…

One thing that stuck out to me was you mentioned needing 10 more years of work to reach your early retirement goals. That sounds like a really long time to me, considering how negative your experience is with working.

If you get your savings rate up to 75-80%, it shouldn't take you more than a few years to earn your freedom for life, even if it's a fairly modest existence.

For what it's worth, that's my plan. Save another 2-3 years then retire to live frugally (in US or abroad) on about $20-24k a year, 3-3.5% withdrawal rate.

Having to hang in there for 2-3 years can be rough at times, but 10 years would be crushing.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#725

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It sounds like you're looking for potential matches in the wrong places. If you're looking on Tinder you shouldn't be surprised that a lot of people just want to hook up. You might have better like if you spend time with more socially conservative groups. Churches often have social gatherings where you might have better luck finding someone closer to what you seem to be looking for.

This is sound advice but I can also see that it seems unlikely for someone with radical spiritual views.

What seems unlikely for someone with radical spiritual views?

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#726
post #218

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I hate the mild feeling of discomfort I get when I tell most people I'm a software engineer. Oddly enough, I recently found myself saying something to this effect, in a meeting: "I'm an engineer, a professional. I like to take pride in my work. I look at doctors (or civil engineers) at my age and wonder about the level of respect they enjoy and how they approach their profession. How did we get to a point where we…

The collapse of American education might have something to do with this.

Australian here; it's the same here. "Oh Software Engineer..." cue vacant look

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#727

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Start your own business, work fewer hours, and take the cut in pay. That's what I did, and I have no regrets. It's the best decision I ever made.

How to? Starting your own business is not easy.

I used Zen Business to handle the legal stuff. Beyond that, my business is basically do what I did for a salary job (Python/Django), but fewer hours per week, and getting paid hourly without benefits. That wouldn't work for every career, but in my situation it actually was pretty easy.

Taxes are definitely not easy, but having a separate business bank account has made them a lot easier.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#728

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Start your own business, work fewer hours, and take the cut in pay. That's what I did, and I have no regrets. It's the best decision I ever made.

I'd love to hear more about this. Have you considered writing a blog post about this and sharing it here? Or if you happen to know of any good resources you can share, I'd appreciate those too. The reason I ask is that I imagine a small or solo startup that's not focusing on massive growth but is optimizing for quality of life has a different set of challenges than the more traditional startups that people on HN are…

I haven't written a blog post, because I don't feel like I have all the answers by any means. I'm sure there are better ways to do almost everything I've done. I haven't always been successful. Maybe in a few years if I have more stuff worked out I'll write a blog post about it.

> The reason I ask is that I imagine a small or solo startup that's not focusing on massive growth but is optimizing for quality of life has a different set of challenges than the more traditional startups that people on HN are used to.

For sure!

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#729

I'm shocked at how many people seem to be doing OK or have minor complaints. For me, I've realized that if I have to do anything for 40+ hours a week on a schedule, after a couple of weeks, I'd prefer being dead. I could be a professional ice cream taste tester or race car driver, and after about 3 weeks of showing up at a fixed time and putting in 8 hours, I'd still be ready to off myself again. When I have week-lon…

I agree wholeheartedly. I've tried again and again to do a full time job and I just can't handle how soul sucking it is. I'm 30 and in my life I've had a total of less than a year of full time employment.

It's not a terrible life, but I do worry about the future a lot, especially when I meet my old college friends and realise what the 100k+ salary gets you. I wish I could do the same but I cannot.

Re: Ask HN: Are you ok?

#730
post #615

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have no idea what Classic is, but maybe it's not the thing you'd want to do so much of. That doesn't mean there isn't anything, or any combination of things, that you could do.

World of Warcraft Classic. It's MMORPG videogame from Blizzard.

Ah, jeez. Yeah, it seems fairly obvious that spending that much time in front of a screen isn't the path to happiness. If that's what he did with his time off no wonder he was unhappy with it.

I need to at least do something physical to be happy.

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