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What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

nytimes.com

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Re: What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

#21

Post by rjpr »

rjurney wrote: post #14

It is unfortunate that stigma around mental illness causes most people to view psychiatric hospitals as places to avoid at all cost, as they have a stigma so terrible going to one is like dying multiple deaths. After that you're 'legally' crazy (whatever the fuck that means)! In fact, if you need one, if you are severely depressed or hallucinating, a hospital is exactly the place for you. You will most likely love it…

Personally I'd avoid them at all costs due to the loss of control. You can't just decide "I'm done" or "I don't like it here", you getting released is at the discretion of people that you don't even know.

Re: What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

#22

Post by AnimalMuppet »

questionsuch wrote: post #3

As much as I know all of these things, the attitude my loved one has has killed the love out of me. Constant negativity, agitation, it's just tiring. I just can't seem to not take it personal, and to have a mindset that it is the disease and not the person. I can't figure out how to start loving the person again.

Act in love, no matter how you feel.

That takes emotional energy and strength. You have to find that somewhere other than out of that relationship.

Re: What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

#23

Post by agumonkey »

caio1982 wrote: post #5

"Remember, people do recover from depression" That IMHO seems to be as much of a taboo as having depression itself for a lot of people... it's hard to convince someone that depression is seriously real, and equally hard to convince people [affected by their loving one's] depression is not like terminal cancer.

Depression fucks with your interpretation of reality, the distortion seems impossible to 1) not be true, 2) restored.

It's indeed possible to get near normal, but it's very hard to convey to someone in such pains.

Rationality also goes out of the window when emotion storms strike. Even though I knew that the previous day I was alright, if the next I go down, it's not always enough to help me go through the bad times.

ps: also give pills a chance, they might not work, but it might lessen your load tremendously and avoid further damage.

Re: What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

#24

Post by drak0n1c »

Klathmon wrote: post #12
kyleperik wrote: post #10

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Honestly I wasn't trying to start any sort of debate either, I just didn't know that was really something people have to be aware of. That's very sad. I feel bad not knowing that's the way things are now.

It's absolutely not like that everywhere, or for everyone, but for many it's a real problem, and it's not one that has an easy solution. And I'm kind of upset that your comment is getting downvoted so much, as it's a very valid question. Growing up I was taught to trust the police, that if something was wrong to go to them and they will help, that they were safe and would protect me. But at this point in my life I'm…

Statistics show that such a danger is very tiny compared to the benefit of seeking the aid of law enforcement for every race, even if you don't filter out cases where the officer was purposefully antagonized. Social media and 24/7 news is incentivized to publicize negative outliers. Similar to fear around radical terrorism - there is a pattern, but statistically it's not an issue worth altering your lifestyle around.

The discussion is largely rooted in anecdata and can be interpreted multiple ways due to the relatively low number of lethal events: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2016/07/13/why-a...

Re: What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

#25

Post by soared »

rjpr wrote: post #21
rjurney wrote: post #14

It is unfortunate that stigma around mental illness causes most people to view psychiatric hospitals as places to avoid at all cost, as they have a stigma so terrible going to one is like dying multiple deaths. After that you're 'legally' crazy (whatever the fuck that means)! In fact, if you need one, if you are severely depressed or hallucinating, a hospital is exactly the place for you. You will most likely love it…

Personally I'd avoid them at all costs due to the loss of control. You can't just decide "I'm done" or "I don't like it here", you getting released is at the discretion of people that you don't even know.

You are part of the problem - you're making it seem like some evil doctors tie you down. The reality is if you bring yourself to a hospital you just request to leave and . Doctors have the ability to petition the courts to keep you there. It goes to a US Court, not some evil medical doctor's back office.

http://www.disabilityrightsohio.org/when-person-wants-releas...

Even if you're forced to go a mental facility by family/friends/other, it must be legally addressed within 72 hours, and a physician must see you within 48.

http://www.lcnewschronicle.com/opinion/columns/4390185-judge...

Re: What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

#26

Post by RobertDeNiro »

spdustin wrote: post #9

I feel like this should be left here: Everybody you meet has a secret smile, and a secret pain. If your secret pain feels like a weight you can no longer carry, please talk to someone. Anyone. Lay down your burdens, and give your shoulders a rest. If you're in the US, there's the National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255 LGBT folks in the US might also consider The Trevor Project Lifeline: 1-866-488-7386 I…

Suicide hotlines are pretty ineffective as far as suicide prevention goes.

Re: What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

#27

Post by rjpr »

soared wrote: post #25
rjpr wrote: post #21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Personally I'd avoid them at all costs due to the loss of control. You can't just decide "I'm done" or "I don't like it here", you getting released is at the discretion of people that you don't even know.

You are part of the problem - you're making it seem like some evil doctors tie you down. The reality is if you bring yourself to a hospital you just request to leave and . Doctors have the ability to petition the courts to keep you there. It goes to a US Court, not some evil medical doctor's back office. http://www.disabilityrightsohio.org/when-person-wants-releas... Even if you're forced to go a mental facility by f…

Did you read this at all?

> If you have admitted yourself into a psychiatric hospital, you can not simply sign yourself out and leave when you decide to do so. There is a process which must be followed in order to leave.

Re: What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

#28

Post by weego »

caio1982 wrote: post #5

"Remember, people do recover from depression" That IMHO seems to be as much of a taboo as having depression itself for a lot of people... it's hard to convince someone that depression is seriously real, and equally hard to convince people [affected by their loving one's] depression is not like terminal cancer.

Recovery is just another step in the process.

You don't forget what it's like to start to suffocate in the abyss.

You don't forget what it's like to know that dying is easier than any other option available to you and that it's a blink of an eye away.

It scars you

Re: What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

#29

Post by e1ven »

soared wrote: post #25
rjpr wrote: post #21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Personally I'd avoid them at all costs due to the loss of control. You can't just decide "I'm done" or "I don't like it here", you getting released is at the discretion of people that you don't even know.

You are part of the problem - you're making it seem like some evil doctors tie you down. The reality is if you bring yourself to a hospital you just request to leave and . Doctors have the ability to petition the courts to keep you there. It goes to a US Court, not some evil medical doctor's back office. http://www.disabilityrightsohio.org/when-person-wants-releas... Even if you're forced to go a mental facility by f…

I strongly disagree.

Without getting too far into anecdotes, I’ve personally seen multiple people reach out to hospitals for help, and all of them were in a worse condition for it - Both by their own account of the events, and from my outside perspective.

While you might be right in an ideal world, real experiences don’t live up to that standard.

Re: What to Do When a Loved One Is Severely Depressed

#30

Post by [deleted] »

dsfyu404ed wrote: post #13
kyleperik wrote: post #4

Great article, but what is this about? Is this really true? > But remember that interactions with law enforcement can vary wildly, depending on race and socio-economic background.

I don't see why you're getting downvoted. How many people here would have said the same thing a few years ago before the issue became more mainstream? Interactions depend just as much on the cop(s) in question (and the bad interactions seem to depend more on the cop) as the person but the statement from the article is basically true at face value. It's always been true. That said, NYT wouldn't have said this a few ye…

[deleted]
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