Earlier quoted context omitted.
> If there was ever a person who did not deserve this, it's Matt. Let's be clear... NO ONE deserves to die or to lose a loved one. And yet...
Injecting politics?
How the fuck am I getting flagged for this?
Some terrible personal news
151–160 of 234 posts
Re: Some terrible personal news
#152Earlier quoted context omitted.
This crosses into personal attack, which is not allowed here and which we ban accounts for. It was also particularly tasteless to post that here. Would you please read https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html and not post like this again?
A personal attack is to insult some-one or to be-little them. It is a recommendation of some very worrisome warning signs of the post.
It certainly was be-littling him. You may be right, but especially on such a sensible topic it's all about how you write it.
Re: Some terrible personal news
#153Re: Some terrible personal news
#154Earlier quoted context omitted.
The point here is that the proximate medical cause isn’t actually the complete cause. While medical records are useful, they don’t explain the circumstances that led to someone’s death, and are therefore heavily missing information in many cases. The person who died of pneumonia because they couldn’t afford to go to hospital - all that gets listed on their certificate is that they died of pneumonia, and so we’re lack…
That's all true, but are not the job of the death certificate or the responsibility of a doctor. It has to be as objective as possible, not a matter of interpretation, that would be an appropriate role for an inquest.
Only because we have defined the role of a death certificate as containing the immediate medical cause of death. You’re arguing that something should be the way it is because that’s the way it is.
Re: Some terrible personal news
#155Earlier quoted context omitted.
I get that. It's of course completely possible that we're only in honeymoon stage. I also understand the psychology that if you're looking for others to fill up your own inadequacies, you may run into trouble. But in my case, I don't think that's the story for me. Rather, she's opened my eyes about the wrong ways I viewed everything. I can quantifiably say that she's making me a better person firstly through giving m…
I don't think xab9 is denying that your wife made you a better person and see things in a different light. That's awesome and you should be proud of her. But your comments keep showing a form of dependancy that can quickly spiral out of control and turn against you (personally I have been there). A psychologist can be a tremendous help in preventing such situations. Like xab9's comment, please do not take offence in…
Thanks, this is food for thought.
Re: Some terrible personal news
#156I lost my wife suddenly in 2009, she was 34. Losing your significant other is something that you never get over - you live with the emptiness and the hurt, and you learn to move on and hope that the "fog" eventually lifts. It's something that only someone else who has been through the same experience will understand. I was lucky to meet a friend who had lost her husband a couple years before, and she helped me throug…
I know "thoughts and prayers" does nothing
For what it's worth Matt, you have mine.
Re: Some terrible personal news
#157Earlier quoted context omitted.
Im curious how would they know all medical indication show they could have survived longer. I mean I see few movies with this underline story but do we really have some solid proof?
this is true. Take 10 million couples and maybe 1 in 10 million, this happens, and this is what we hear in the news. We never hear about the wife that lives 10 more years after their 85+ year old husband dies.
Problem is, I cannot take a single person and perform such test yet 10 million thats why I was looking for some solid stats or research/paper.
Maybe you don't hear. My grandparents were together since about 16 and my grandmother passed away 12 years ago. And I never seen couple more in love, including my grandma having tatoo of his name on her chest, something unheard of and frown upon back in the days. And my grandfather is turning 94 this summer.
Re: Some terrible personal news
#158Earlier quoted context omitted.
Please go and see a Psychologist.
This crosses into personal attack, which is not allowed here and which we ban accounts for. It was also particularly tasteless to post that here. Would you please read https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html and not post like this again?
Can I ask you why this comment was flagged but the sibling one (by xab9), which says the same thing, was not?
Re: Some terrible personal news
#159Earlier quoted context omitted.
> Netflix is famous for this (and has high retention) Netflix has high turnover, about 15-20% depending on source.
Everything I have heard has been anecdotal and contradicts this. Do you happen to _have_ the source for your information? I admit I don't for mine.
Sure. Netflix's Chief Product Officer, Neil Hunt, has provided the 15% statistic directly in interviews. There are a few places you can find him saying this, but the first one I found by searching was this: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/netflix-redefined-american-co.... Other estimates (typically by employees self-reporting) put it at about 20%. Keep in mind about half of those are involuntary departures. Personally, I think that involuntary departures are a meaningful measure when we're talking about employee retention, but there are reasonable arguments to the contrary. More pertinently, Netflix's culture is somewhat unique among tech companies of its size in that it fires very quickly.
Contributing my own anecdata here: I am familiar with current and past employees at Netflix who have told me personally that plenty of people are fired from Netflix because they don't jive with the culture, not necessarily because they are incompetent. That's not intended to be a remark about Netflix being a toxic company; on the contrary, I think Netflix is pretty self-aware about its "corporate values." But that means that engineers who could succeed at Google, Facebook, etc might not succeed at Netflix because the latter looks for a lot of self-direction and career ambition, not just competence.
Circling back to the point: I've seen some people slice off involuntary termination numbers when discussing attrition at tech companies, but I don't think that's appropriate. Sometimes people leave because they're intellectually or financially unsatisfied, and that would mostly comprise the ~7.5-10% that leave voluntarily. But if the bar for being fired is lower, it's probably useful to incorporate the involuntary departures, because there's an argument many of them would leave voluntarily even if not fired due to a culture mismatch.
Re: Some terrible personal news
#160I do feel sorry for the guy. I really do. But how is it possible that one guy's tragedy got to the front page of HN? Why everyone's talking about his wife, but not about others, who probably left family and friends in grief the same way.
Apparently a lot of people know him, or know of him, so it becomes "news" of sorts, if out of place in HN context. Can you feel the pressure not to say anything except a condolence message? I certainly can, but I won't because I've never heard of him.
If the man himself had died, I get why that might find its way here because then you could talk about his work etc.
Personal loss happens to every one of us, be it family or friends. It's part of life, it's heart breaking, it's horrible, it sucks, it's painful. Then, you draw strength from their memory and move on because there's no other choice.