Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

kapwing.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

631–640 of 666 posts

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#631

Post by wruza »

calcifer wrote: post #417
jerf wrote: post #311

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There are plenty of people who are saying implicitly and even a few saying explicitly that it is all men . There are plenty of people who would turn your exact same rhetoric back on you and say that if you think you aren't part of the problem, you just need to look harder, because it is all men , especially the ones who think they have a clean conscience. So in addition to proving my point about how berating the peop…

> There are plenty of people who are saying implicitly I understand you think they are saying all men , but unless you can read minds over the Internet, that’s just your opinion. But more than that, saying “men are sexist” does NOT imply “all men”. It means “a large-enough-to-be-generalized number of men are exist”. If you think it means literally all men (and hence feel attacked by it), in my opinion, on some level,…

This "NOT" seems to be overcapitalized, since it is usually "" in a regular context, as other commenter already noted. It is not a private opinion, it is how language rules define it. From complete redefinition of terms on the fly and going to you-are mind reading in just two sentences, it seems very probable that your argument is either purely emotional or projective or lacks enough logic. When using mirrored version of "girls suck at math", don't expect a different reaction from those who may be actually good at it.

Even if someone temporarily accepts this "large-enough-to-be-generalized" definition, it may have a hard time to retain "large" part, because a number on topic is not more than 156/55000, assuming that 156 is a unique set.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#632

Post by Eufjriendj »

I used to chat on IRC with a very feminine nick (I'm a man), the difference is night and day. People would PM me out of nowhere, pay me all kinds of undue attention. If you don't believe the author, try it yourself, it's easy to reproduce their results.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#633

Post by [deleted] »

TaylorAlexander wrote: post #128
donkeyd wrote: post #122

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I haven't been around where a woman has said "hi" to someone and they're all "Yea, eff your mom" Lucky you, I recently saw this 'interaction' between a guy and a girl on the street: Guy: Hey cutie! Guy: Hey sexy! Guy: Hey girl, come over! Guy: Hey bitch, come over here. Guy: Go away you ugly bitch! The girl just kept walking and the guy turned to more profanities. This wasn't in some shitty part of town, it was at…

I’ve heard that before. Guys will get aggressive if a woman ignores them. I don’t get it and it’s sketchy as hell. It shows how superficial so many guys can be - they want to sound sweet until it’s clear they’re not getting anything, and then they become aggressive. It’s always about their satisfaction - they reveal that they were not being nice in order for the woman to feel better, or they wouldn’t have turned aggr…

[deleted]

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#634

Post by vitro »

andrewmcwatters wrote: post #366
vitro wrote: post #350

Sometimes I think how difficult it must be to be a women, being bombarded by the looks all the time, feeling like a pray... Partly it is in our nature, partly in the culture and education. We as men have still a long way to go to fully respect women. If you haven't seen, I recommend the movie Whores' Glory http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1327628/ to have a peek into the women's life as a sexual worker. If only we could o…

> We as men have still a long way to go to fully respect women. These types of generalizations are akin to saying, "We as Americans have a long way to go to make better student loan investment decisions." The effects are so personal that it's worthless to make blanket statements like this; that is to say–speak for yourself.

You're right. Thanks.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#635

Post by gspetr »

coryfklein wrote: post #428
moomin wrote: post #331

Earlier quoted context omitted.

They eliminated anonymity in large chunks of South Korea’s social media. People didn’t behave better. (With that said, there are certain behaviours e.g. support for fascism that seem to be associated with having large numbers of anon accounts.)

Yea, this is pretty useless information unless you can provide a source for these claims. I find it very hard to believe that the complete elimination of anonymity on a social media platform resulted in exactly 0 improvement in measurable behavior. I Googled both your anonymity and your fascism claims and couldn't find anything, but I'd love to learn more.

https://splinternews.com/black-twitter-has-a-flawless-clap-b...

The closest thing my google-fu got me.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#636

Post by jsjohnst »

Slansitartop wrote: post #401
jsjohnst wrote: post #214

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think you hit the nail on the head, anonymity can bring out the worst in someone, especially when they feel there is zero repercussions. It’s partly why I hate the throw away accounts here.

> I think you hit the nail on the head, anonymity can bring out the worst in someone, especially when they feel there is zero repercussions. It’s partly why I hate the throw away accounts here. It's a tradeoff. There are both good and bad things with anonymity and real name policies: 1. Anonymity: people can express themselves without anxiety, but that gives space to assholes to be assholes (barring other control mec…

Please reread what I posted. I didn't mention/propose/condone "real name" policies. Folks using "handles" are perfectly fine, but I am tired of seeing more and more brand new users with the name "throwaway####" making comments with little to no value.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#637

Post by jsjohnst »

eitland wrote: post #297
jsjohnst wrote: post #214

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think you hit the nail on the head, anonymity can bring out the worst in someone, especially when they feel there is zero repercussions. It’s partly why I hate the throw away accounts here.

Disagree strongly. And HN is proof that this isn't (entirely) true. In fact HN is a lot nicer than a number of verified name forums.

Please reread what I posted. I didn't condone, propose, or even mention "verified name" policies. I am opposed to being forced to use my real name if I don't want to.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#638

Post by gspetr »

coryfklein wrote: post #435
Slansitartop wrote: post #410

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Just because someone returns your behavior doesn't mean they LIKE that sort of behavior, or are even okay with it. Trash talk has a long history: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trash-talk The whole point is for the other side not to like it and get knocked emotionally off-kilter and lose focus, giving you a competitive edge. It's part of the metagame.

It is also generally considered unsportsmanlike and in most cases does not contribute to the game or sport. It reduces the competition from, "Who is best at game strategy and mechanics?", to "Who is best at heckling away any real advantage their opponent actually had?" For most online games I don't see how the latter could ever be considered an improvement to the game.

People have trash talked their way to millions of dollars in poker tournaments.[0]

You can "regulate" this away as a tournament organizer/gamedev company if you wanted to (i.e. allowing allied team only chat or allowing players to disable chat visibility altogether)

[0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jamie_gold

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#640

Post by prepend »

This has got to be exhausting for someone going through this and appreciate the ideas for others who can reduce trolling and harassment.

I sometimes wonder about ways to measure something subjective like attractiveness is an objective enough way that it could be used on dating sites (eg, only dating 6+).

In the olden days you could put a photo up on hotornot and get a rating after a few days. But it’s down because of abuse and general jerkiness.

If you try to have a nice version, people will bias and signal higher scores.

But maybe you could measure troll behavior on bots like this to determine some level of physical, superficial attractiveness. Then you could use those scores for a variety of purposes.

Post reply on HN