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Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

kapwing.com

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Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#231

Post by wruza »

jjeaff wrote: post #140
guy98238710 wrote: post #124

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sexism might be everywhere (going both ways), but this particular case likely isn't sexism. Even if it is, it's not clear whether this is sexism against women or against men (programmers in particular) assumed to be hiding behind pretty woman's photo.

Since the female photos get a significantly higher level of harrassed, how does this not indicate sexism?

Since we know nothing about these strangers, it may be anything from mostly rude boys who like girls (so they target “her”) ... to actually average rude people of all sorts who only attack women. If latter proportion is true, then women get their “cut” asymmetrically.

Lsh, it is no clear indicator.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#232

Post by geezerjay »

acranox wrote: post #226
verroq wrote: post #105

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"Rude people are sexist" or "Sexist people are rude" is about the only conclusion you can draw here (maybe not even that, correlation != causation etc etc) It doesn't even come close to showing how "sexism is everywhere". For all we know the sample could be entirely edgy 12 year olds. Tell me again how this self-admittedly "non-rigorous scientific study" proves "sexism is everywhere"? It could easily be that more att…

Ok, but do you think those 12 year olds are going to all grow up to be well behaving adults? Or maybe the problems with this kind of sexism are starting very young. If you are right then the solutions still need to be addressed, but we need to start earlier.

Marginal levels of immature and/or antisocial elements don't mean that society is sexist, no matter how vocal those trolls may be.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#233

Post by TomMarius »

acranox wrote: post #226
verroq wrote: post #105

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"Rude people are sexist" or "Sexist people are rude" is about the only conclusion you can draw here (maybe not even that, correlation != causation etc etc) It doesn't even come close to showing how "sexism is everywhere". For all we know the sample could be entirely edgy 12 year olds. Tell me again how this self-admittedly "non-rigorous scientific study" proves "sexism is everywhere"? It could easily be that more att…

Ok, but do you think those 12 year olds are going to all grow up to be well behaving adults? Or maybe the problems with this kind of sexism are starting very young. If you are right then the solutions still need to be addressed, but we need to start earlier.

Do you remember how sexist were the 70's and the 80's? People who were 12 back then turned out just fine, considering that we're even discussing this, didn't they?

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#234

Post by HenryBemis »

acranox wrote: post #226
verroq wrote: post #105

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"Rude people are sexist" or "Sexist people are rude" is about the only conclusion you can draw here (maybe not even that, correlation != causation etc etc) It doesn't even come close to showing how "sexism is everywhere". For all we know the sample could be entirely edgy 12 year olds. Tell me again how this self-admittedly "non-rigorous scientific study" proves "sexism is everywhere"? It could easily be that more att…

Ok, but do you think those 12 year olds are going to all grow up to be well behaving adults? Or maybe the problems with this kind of sexism are starting very young. If you are right then the solutions still need to be addressed, but we need to start earlier.

I was thinking just that. Target audience of 12yo boys, who are "parked" by their parents with a tablet, with no control, no supervision, that are left to 'self-educate' in the wild-wild-west of the interwebs, and their responses are quotes and memes, will definitely do that.

On the other hand, a 35yo educated person, that just wants to make something silly for ther corporate 'yammer', will definitely NOT insult or waste time in any other manner.

Kids will be kids.

Uneducated kids will be uneducated kids.

And we should all be patient, as.. ahem.. we were kids one time :)

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#235

Post by nukeop »

alkonaut wrote: post #191

Kids who grew up in an environment where anonymous interaction is the norm (such as kids who have anonymous social chats at school, or do in-game chats etc) have grown so accustomed to it that I don't think they even see it as sexist, racist, bullying etc. Most would probably never say any of this to someones' face, not out of fear of consequences but simply because they know better. Yet in anonymous contact they don…

>and that true anonymity doesn't exist either

Yes it does, you are mistaken. An IP does not identify you if it's a proxy server or a VPN or a Tor node. All existing tracking methods can be fooled.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#236

Post by dsr_ »

geezerjay wrote: post #232
acranox wrote: post #226

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Ok, but do you think those 12 year olds are going to all grow up to be well behaving adults? Or maybe the problems with this kind of sexism are starting very young. If you are right then the solutions still need to be addressed, but we need to start earlier.

Marginal levels of immature and/or antisocial elements don't mean that society is sexist, no matter how vocal those trolls may be.

No, society tolerating those vocal trolls does mean that society is sexist.

"The standard you walk past, is the standard you accept" - Lt. Gen. David Morrison

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#237

Post by closed »

JepZ wrote: post #221

As disturbing as the story is, I find it quite intriguing. Obviously meme makers often have some crude humor, but somehow I assume that most of the visitors who wrote inappropriate comments were male. So I wonder if you could tell a similar story from some other website with a primary female user base. I supposed it would be very different. The other thing is, it seems that the 'sexier' (from a hetero male perspectiv…

I don't know a lot about the topic, but remember this article called "The effect of sexual arousal on sexual decision making", by Dan Ariely

http://www.contrib.andrew.cmu.edu/~gl20/GeorgeLoewenstein/Pa...

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#238

Post by BlackFly »

rocqua wrote: post #227
jsjohnst wrote: post #214

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think you hit the nail on the head, anonymity can bring out the worst in someone, especially when they feel there is zero repercussions. It’s partly why I hate the throw away accounts here.

It's not quite anonymity, its ephemerality. People know that their actions will never come back to them. An anonymous but long-standing account will see less of this than a throw-away account.

Exactly. There is no serious consequence for their actions. If it was more common to be permanently banned for such language, people would probably think twice.

You are pretty anonymous if you walk into a bar and don't tell anyone your name. (Depending on the bar) They will kick you out and put your picture on the wall if you start talking aggressively to the civil regulars. More than that there is the immediate risk of a fist to the face.

Just like bar owners ask themselves what kind of patronage they want, online operators should ask themselves the same question.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#239

Post by spiraldancing »

UncleMeat wrote: post #192
verroq wrote: post #105

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"Rude people are sexist" or "Sexist people are rude" is about the only conclusion you can draw here (maybe not even that, correlation != causation etc etc) It doesn't even come close to showing how "sexism is everywhere". For all we know the sample could be entirely edgy 12 year olds. Tell me again how this self-admittedly "non-rigorous scientific study" proves "sexism is everywhere"? It could easily be that more att…

This one thing is obviously not the smoking gun. But in context of the thousands of other similar things it becomes impossible not to see a pattern.

Well, apparently not impossible, if one denies hard enough.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#240

Post by wruza »

javadocmd wrote: post #13

I think anyone remotely familiar with the internet won't be surprised by these outcomes. Of course the occasional reality check is always good. I wonder to what extent plucky startups expect abuse when they put pop-up chat dialogs in their products. I imagine it's inescapable that some percentage of your user base is going to see it as an invitation to respond poorly. Something door-to-door salespeople and telemarket…

Apart from logical reasoning of this phenomena, and being polite in general, I actually hate it when someone pops up and is like “hey, you have a problem”, on any site. Especially when popup covers content and/or site controls. Multiply that by someone’s low culture and voila.

I’ll not be wondered if this $10M problem solves with help me button at right top of the screen, instead of popups.

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