61–70 of 90 posts
Are there any legal grounds for criminal prosecution here?
Would it makes sense for the perpetrator to go to the police and admit guilt? Would there still be consequences in that case? And if so, is that part of the reason why these apologies always seem to be very vague about details?
And if all that, should we expect anything less from an 'apology'?
Earlier quoted context omitted.
A real apology requires a clear statement of what you did wrong, why it was wrong, and what exactly you'll do better in the future. This apology doesn't even say what he did wrong. (He "damaged trust," "caused pain," "behaved in ways that were inappropriate.") He didn't admit that he sexually harassed anyone, say nothing of sexual assault. Without a clear admission of what he did, I have no idea if he knows why it wa…
On the list of public apologies, I give him a B+. he could have done better and he is not going to make everyone happy with his effort. It looks written by him. It looks sincere. It looks honest. Yeah, a good apology should be several pages long but this was pretty good and well above some of the others we've seen. 'I am sorry that you felt abused and that your friends encouraged you to humiliate yourself in public..…
For example, he could have said this:
"I apologize for repeatedly sexually assaulting women at conferences, including Quinn Norton. Over the years, I've done this more times than I can count. What I did was is illegal, and rightfully so, because everyone has the right to be safe, and to decide who is allowed to touch their own body. I'll never sexually harass or assault anyone again. Most of the time I did this, I was drunk or high; I went sober over two years ago. I'm also seeing a therapist to help set me straight."
That good apology would have been half the length of the bad apology he actually gave.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Amends and penance are not the same thing. Amends are about reparations for the victim. Penance is about suffering for the perpetrator. These things are mostly not related.
I was talking about penance, and I also used the word penance, so we're good, right? The quoted section is what made me think about this aspect of the issue.
I replied at all because of this line:
I'd just once love to see one of these abusers make some kind of serious penance.
I considered replying at length and decided against it. My initial impulse was to feel like I can give you the thing you are asking for. But, then I realized, no, I can't.
The individual that raped me made amends. But, he did not do penance. I eventually forgave him, in part because he made amends.
I never got the apology I spent years wanting, nor any confession of guilt. I eventually concluded it wasn't important.
I don't imagine you actually want to hear that. So, I decided to not write about it.
What you want is for these people to suffer. In a sense, you want some kind of revenge. I generally do not. I would much rather see reparations made to those who were harmed.
Ghandi said "An eye for an eye will leave us all blind."
I don't think you build peacefulness and positive environments by going on the warpath. Peace is not merely the absence of something negative. Peacefulness or a peaceful environment is an actively positive experience that can be remarkably hard to try to describe effectively.
It is probably a mistake to reply here. It feels equally problematic to not reply. I will likely not engage further.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
On the list of public apologies, I give him a B+. he could have done better and he is not going to make everyone happy with his effort. It looks written by him. It looks sincere. It looks honest. Yeah, a good apology should be several pages long but this was pretty good and well above some of the others we've seen. 'I am sorry that you felt abused and that your friends encouraged you to humiliate yourself in public..…
A good apology doesn't have to be "several pages long." A good apology could have been shorter than the bad apology he gave. For example, he could have said this: "I apologize for repeatedly sexually assaulting women at conferences, including Quinn Norton. Over the years, I've done this more times than I can count. What I did was is illegal, and rightfully so, because everyone has the right to be safe, and to decide…
The tweet linked in the article about letting this "play out" paints him worse, if that was possible. https://twitter.com/gtlpearson/status/921480719381254144
Why was Redesk CEO Guy Pearson looking to hire someone for a speaking engagement the day after they were accused of sexual assault? I stole that from Twitter, but it's not a good look. Did he just not really care or did he figure that he could act duplicitous and insert himself into a situation that has nothing to do with him? Who benefits from that? Would rather not make this comment at all because there's an actual…
I think the tweeter's intention was to see what he could get out of this, but it also showed Scoble's attitude about the whole incident.
Are there any legal grounds for criminal prosecution here?
That's been my number one question for a while now also in regards to other cases and other 'apologies'. Would it makes sense for the perpetrator to go to the police and admit guilt? Would there still be consequences in that case? And if so, is that part of the reason why these apologies always seem to be very vague about details? And if all that, should we expect anything less from an 'apology'?
Remember, he's not sorry he did it, he's sorry he got caught.
This makes me feel that no matter how reasonable ppl seem, once in power there is always a high probability of abuse of that power.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Have you ever looked at the accounts of women who /have/ reported it? If it actually goes to trial basically the defense finds every single thing you ever did and tries to portray you as a slut who was asking for it. If the person is famous people will say you’re lying and trying to get rich out of a settlement. You’re required to repeatedly go over every step of the assault whether it was harassment or rape. They as…
The Stanford case is a really good (and chilling) example of what victims of these crimes can go through. This is the letter the victim read to the rapist at his sentencing[1]. [1]: https://www.buzzfeed.com/katiejmbaker/heres-the-powerful-let...