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I fell in love with an assassin (2008)

independent.co.uk

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Re: I fell in love with an assassin (2008)

#71

Post by jimmywanger »

LordKano wrote: post #45
make3 wrote: post #29

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Thinking only sociopaths can do really terrible things is likely very wrong. Normal people can decide over some time to switch off empathy, or to work against it. This needs to be understood.

Anger, pain or desperation will make otherwise normal people do some very abnormal things. Even in the most "civilized" and wealthy of western democracies, 1 week of no food, water and electricity would lead to absolute bedlam. Three months of that kind of desperation would lead to otherwise normal people killing and robbing strangers. When the crisis abates, they'll be able to rationalize away their behavior because…

"An empty stomach has no conscience".

I would argue that neither does a stiff dick.

If you look at Maslov's hierarchy, if you can't fulfill your basic needs at the bottom of the pyramid, you're not really looking for self-actualization.

Re: I fell in love with an assassin (2008)

#72

Post by nbanks »

cl0wnshoes wrote: post #54
LordKano wrote: post #46

One time, I fell in love with a run of the mill sociopath. Fortunately, she wasn't a violent one.

He definitely had some issues as well. For sex he let assassinating informants and others (non-militant?) slide. It seemed like he still tried to keep the sexual relationship going even after she told him she did some side work cutting a body into pieces, though it was harder and eventually led to him moving on. All around no bueno.

I suspect living in a war zone does this to people, which is how he explained it. Somehow he was able to see his girlfriend as a soldier instead of a murderer when the two were conflated.

Re: I fell in love with an assassin (2008)

#73

Post by nbanks »

This must be what it would be like to be a Bond girl in real life. Not very glamorous. As a dude, I've never really thought of what it's like to date someone who kills people for a living because the gender roles are usually reversed.

Re: I fell in love with an assassin (2008)

#74

Post by BrandoElFollito »

cl0wnshoes wrote: post #54
LordKano wrote: post #46

One time, I fell in love with a run of the mill sociopath. Fortunately, she wasn't a violent one.

He definitely had some issues as well. For sex he let assassinating informants and others (non-militant?) slide. It seemed like he still tried to keep the sexual relationship going even after she told him she did some side work cutting a body into pieces, though it was harder and eventually led to him moving on. All around no bueno.

Rationality is not what humans are best in. People stay in toxic relationships, or make babies in the middle of a war.

We are driven by chemistry much more than rationality.

Re: I fell in love with an assassin (2008)

#75

Post by _nedR »

kaosjester wrote: post #47
netzone wrote: post #14

The first sentence seems something out of Buzzfeed. > ... (with a few conveniently erased). Just... why?

Also, this gem: > We ate on the balcony and, as we shared a bottle of wine and listened to the chorus of insects, I began to think that the year of groundwork I had put in was about to pay off. Marylin stayed the night.

At least he is kind-of-honest about his motives.

Re: I fell in love with an assassin (2008)

#76

Post by erikb »

I always cringe a little when I read these naive white-boy style of stories, in form of documentaries or texts like this one. Reminds me so much of how I acted the first time I was in a country where people are still required to face reality much closer than they like. Reminds me of how I probably still act considering how good a life we live here in the West.

It's really a pity when these documentaries don't contain literal quotes and face expression images, since there is so much that a naive documenter can't see, and therefore can't write down. For instance in these situations for the man it's usually an exciting adventure with sexy cherries on top. But for her it's often an attempt for a better life, a very serious matter. But because she knows that the John Snows don't know anything, she also needs to play the relaxed sexy lover.

This, I believe is true strength. Constantly for weeks, maybe months, acting relaxed and enjoying having another person inside you, not because it's the truth but because you hope for your daughter, your blood, that she will have a better life than you. It's an amazing thing to watch. And really painful when she dies in the end like in this story, to some degree because the guy wasn't able to even get a hint of the situation.

For other people who also enjoy that I suggest the movie "The Banquet (2006)" (夜宴) from China. It gives a good opportunity to get an inside view into that kind of situation. Quote (own translation): "The true art is not to hide your feelings behind a mask. The true art is to turn your face into the mask."

Re: I fell in love with an assassin (2008)

#77

Post by erikb »

tebruno99 wrote: post #50

Everyone is of course titled to their own opinion but for me personally I feel like Love doesn't mean what this person thinks it means.....

People need to experience true risk and true loss before they develop true feeling. Before that it's all flat and simple. Of course it's hard to say if you would like someone to experience such a bad thing to gain that inside or rather want them to experience such a flat life. In my eyes not an easy choice what to wish for others.

Re: I fell in love with an assassin (2008)

#78

Post by erikb »

moron4hire wrote: post #12

>> But her excuses, or lack of them, riled me and I told her she represented everything that was wrong with the country. Bold thing to say to a sociopath with a gun.

I think this is the kind of stupidity that women actually filter for, not filter against. Because that kind of stupidity can only come with a save and comparatively rich life.

Re: I fell in love with an assassin (2008)

#80

Post by erikb »

Tomte wrote: post #30

BTW, this is the ninth time I have submitted this story. But I just knew it fits this audience, so I tried again. So, if you feel your submissions never make it to the front page, realize that much of it is pure chance.

This story actually was on the front page, which is also why I don't give your link an upvote. But maybe not by you. Btw retransmitting is frowned upon in most communities and can even result in bans.
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