LSD: My Life-Saving Drug

I find myself having similar thoughts whenever I talk or think about having similar experiences. I've had small doses of mushrooms and LCD before which were a combination of good and ok experiences. DMT terrifies me for the reasons above. I like how I'm wired for the most part. I also know that I can have (and have had) some very bad experiences, even just with weed.

I had a close friend that experimented with a few things I'd like to not say, and it changed his life profoundly for a long time, and still impacts him today 3 or 4 years later. The changes, for the most part, were mostly not good (from my perspective). I would say that he "lost his mind" for at least a couple of months. But he also made some changes that were absolutely positive.

I'd like to see what all the fuss is about. But do I need to? Will life as I know it survive? For the moment I'm not seeking this experience out. I feel like if it comes to me in the right setting I'll likely participate, but until then, I'll sit on the sidelines and hope for the research (and laws) to improve.

2CB dilutes in water with a little effort and it's much easier to measure out consistent doses in tablespoons or mL of a liquid rather than very minute amounts of a powder.

Fun drug, but it upsets my stomach.

I came here to write something along these lines.

About a year ago, I ate _way_ too much cannabis before a party then proceeded to have a terrible trip. The subtle meaning in people's interactions, which I had always been able to respond to intuitively, suddenly became apparent and burdensome. I saw a man who did not receive enough affection from his wife and spoke needily to others, reaching out for warmth. I saw a woman who appeared to be dissatisfied in her marriage, lingering just a bit too long in hugs with other men. I saw a man who was uncomfortable with parties, and wanted to corner me in a private discussion so he could disengage from the group. The feeling that these people were unable to mask their deep and private needs in this public forum combined with the feeling that something was expected of me that I could not give sent me into a spiral of embarrassment and nervousness.

Becoming terrified that I would be unable to control my emotions (that I might begin weeping in front of everybody for example), I disappeared without a word to hide in my car. Fearing that I would be seen and mistaken for a criminal waiting to commit a crime, I tried to stuff myself into a ball on the floor of the backseat. I was convinced that someone would see me and call the police, and I'd be arrested because I would be unable to communicate with them. The fear was so intense that I could feel myself shivering, and when my wife came to rescue me I was unable to speak in a steady voice.

Over the course of the following year, I struggled with depression and crippling social anxiety, which I had never experienced before. Things as routine as taking my cat to the vet were a real challenge, and I relied on Xanax to get me through a number of totally banal interactions which I had previously handled automatically. Granted, I was also experiencing intense social isolation and a weakening support system due to unrelated factors - I cannot definitively pin my struggles on this incident with cannabis. Still, it scared me enough that I began researching and critically examining my cannabis usage.

Ultimately I decided that it would still be a part of my life, but that I would no longer use it in public settings, that I would be exceedingly careful with dosage and reduce my usage in general, and that I would examine my current state before using it. I've recovered 100% from the depression, 95% from the anxiety (I still feel mild nerves speaking in group settings, like introducing myself at a meeting), and I have never had a bad cannabis experience since. I have also decided that using other drugs with psychedelic effects is not worth the risk for me, and I have sworn off them altogether.

You might be of the opinion that mental problems are fixed however. If you are, there is nothing anyone can say to convince you. Many mental problems could be thought of as spiritual problems insofar as you're not understanding yourself and why you're here. This leads to secret fears, which drives the cogs of many people's gears, but their blindness moves them only in circles.

Again, you'll be without convincing if you are of the victim mentality. If you're not, psychedelics are widely known for inducing huge character changes because something deep happens. You can think of it as a rotted root made anew. The plant "out of nowhere" thrives. It's the same thing for your mind. Clean the mirror and the message shines forth. This is hard to understand for many humans who have many self-created messages dirtying their mind. Psychedelics literally turns all that stuff off and you get to have a real experience as a result.