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ADHD Didn't Break Me–My Parents Did

claimingattention.substack.com

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Re: ADHD Didn't Break Me–My Parents Did

#91

Post by patcon »

godelski wrote: post #83
lqet wrote: post #15

> John Taylor Gatto's Dumbing Us Down perfectly captured this when he noticed that schools, another place where authority figures hang out, ruthlessly disciplined any child who tried to assert individuality. There has been an interesting result recently, which was discussed here [0]. In an online game where participants had to forage for resources, people with attention deficits scored higher, because they preferred…

> People with ADHD - and their parents and teachers - should therefore embrace their individuality as a kind of reservoir talent in the human gene pool. Being a researcher with ADHD I find academia very very weird. I feel like my ADHD (and others I know) should be a superpower. Loving to dig down into rabbit holes and a bunch of different topics, which can allow connecting different things. Not needing reasons to go…

You might get a kick out of this: it's an attempt to remodel funding to reward and reinvigorate research with the intelligence of the folks who straddle fields -- to reward those who make correct predictions about where future "breakthrough innovations" (ie. Intersectional and significant research convergences) will appear: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=guLDNMAOn24

Puja Ohlhaver has some great ideas and interventions in this space <3

Re: ADHD Didn't Break Me–My Parents Did

#92

Post by loloquwowndueo »

pugets wrote: post #58

My experience with my ADHD diagnosis and the 25 years of Adderall that followed have left me jaded at the state of psychiatry. The focus of my attention does indeed change at a rate which is faster than average. If something can distract me from a task, then it usually does, at least for a few moments. But why is this classified as a deficiency and a disorder? In other words, why is directed attention considered the…

I’m curious to know if medication helped you conform to the societal expectation regarding attention, and whether you experienced other effects from it (positive, negative).

I’d value anecdata to know more and decide whether to push back if school starts pressuring for an adhd evaluation which is usually for an ulterior goal of medicating the kid.

Re: ADHD Didn't Break Me–My Parents Did

#93

Post by patcon »

lqet wrote: post #15

> John Taylor Gatto's Dumbing Us Down perfectly captured this when he noticed that schools, another place where authority figures hang out, ruthlessly disciplined any child who tried to assert individuality. There has been an interesting result recently, which was discussed here [0]. In an online game where participants had to forage for resources, people with attention deficits scored higher, because they preferred…

STRONG agree with your sentiments btw

Re: ADHD Didn't Break Me–My Parents Did

#94

Post by WarOnPrivacy »

o11c wrote: post #49

I must disagree with this very strongly; this attitude of "the problem isn't me, the problem is other people" is exceedingly harmful. You cannot blame others for their (alleged) inflexibility when you yourself are incapable of flexibility. Consider: you fly to the UK and try to drive on the right side of the road like you always have. Do you have the right to blame everyone for driving toward you? Or should you adapt…

> "the problem isn't me, the problem is other people" is exceedingly harmful.

I can still work with it though. I recognize that I can't fix their flaws and the power I have is to adapt.

Recognizing flaws in others was gateway thinking for me. It lead to me seeking and finding flaw-groups that I'm a member of. That led to me seeking reasonable causes for mass flaws.

And that led me to a small group of causes. They center around individual capacity (everyone is doing ~the best they can) and reactions to feelings of helplessness (the other end of a bad behavior chain).

FF to now. I'm considering a unified flaw that seems to hobble every group eventually.

    No one anywhere wants to clean their own house
Thank you and I hope you enjoyed this tour.

Re: ADHD Didn't Break Me–My Parents Did

#96

Post by tonymet »

I've many friends and family members over-diagnosed with mental illness in preteens, plied with legal meth (Ritalin and Adderall), psychotropics & anti-psychotics. They are now adult basket cases.

There is a confirmation bias especially in tech, since many high-achievers are also taking these drugs. I want to warn people that you are only seeing the winners not the victims.

For every successful Adderall addict you know, there are dozens of lives that have been ruined by parents and quacks.

Re: ADHD Didn't Break Me–My Parents Did

#97

Post by loganc2342 »

tfigueroa wrote: post #27

What you have here is essentially a tragedy. I totally sympathize with the author as someone who is (probably) neurodivergent but had accommodating parents. Being given space to better understand myself and my value was integral to my success and in being ok being different. But as a dad to a neurodivergent kid, I impose structure - sometimes to discomfort, never intentionally to pain - because structure is imposed u…

I’m with you. The author makes bold claims about not following the assumptions imposed upon you about success and productivity, but what, exactly, is the alternative? Maybe I could go live in the wilderness, hunting and foraging at my own pace, instead of the pace imposed upon me. Of course, that isn’t realistic for the vast majority of people.

> Instead of feeling bad, examine the gap between your current life and the one you yearn for.

Say, for example, my definition of fulfillment is having a large array of close friends. If I find myself distracted from or am unwilling to shower, that will drive many people off. If I miss social cues and communicate “in a different language,” so to speak, that will make it difficult to relate to people and become close with them. If I don’t let myself sleep, I’ll be robbed of the motivation and energy I need to pursue this goal or any other.

That’s just an example. But the vast majority of people, regardless of how they define fulfillment, will have to “play society’s game” to some extent.

Re: ADHD Didn't Break Me–My Parents Did

#98

Post by SmirkingRevenge »

pugets wrote: post #58

My experience with my ADHD diagnosis and the 25 years of Adderall that followed have left me jaded at the state of psychiatry. The focus of my attention does indeed change at a rate which is faster than average. If something can distract me from a task, then it usually does, at least for a few moments. But why is this classified as a deficiency and a disorder? In other words, why is directed attention considered the…

A lot of that is true. Evolutionary advantage is always relative to the environment.

ADHD can have material impact on other aspects of your life though not just stuff related to studies or cognitive jobs.

A recent bit of research linked ADHD to shorter life expectancy (7-9 years). Reasons probably vary but I'd wager a big part of it is that those with ADHD can have a much harder time keeping up with regular life maintenance, including matters of personal health.

Making that doctor's appointment for a checkup or cancer screening is always 5 minutes away. Encountering even the least bit of unexpected friction can derail you even when you manage to get moving. Next thing you know, 6 months have gone by.

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2025/jan/23/adults-diagn...

Re: ADHD Didn't Break Me–My Parents Did

#99

Post by patcon »

swayvil wrote: post #85
__rito__ wrote: post #50

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There are already some research hinting that ADHD in human population helped human civilization progress. [0][1] [0]: https://www.healthline.com/health/adhd/evolution [1]: https://www.theguardian.com/science/2024/feb/21/adhd-may-hav...

All the great inventions, great art, great ideas. ADHD. Nobody else has the focus. In ancient times the Raja Yogis (basically wizards) preferred to recruit from those with ADHD. They called them "habitually one-pointed".

Wouldn't "habitually one-pointed" people be very focussed, rather than distracted?

Or is the idea that a very distracted person being honed into a focussed and aware person is a duality that's valued -- able to live in both worlds? (Rather than a very focussed person being taught to be distracted and highly integrative?)

Re: ADHD Didn't Break Me–My Parents Did

#100

Post by nradov »

dublinben wrote: post #65
jappgar wrote: post #46

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes I think this is the correct take. "It shouldn't be this way!" But it is. As others have said in comments, ADHD actually may be an optimization in certain environments, but do those environments actually exist in 2024? Even if they exist Are they preferable, overall, to the typical alternative? There may be jobs that are better suited to someone with ADHD, but do they pay a living wage? Are they precarious? Are th…

There's no shortage of careers with fast-paced work environments requiring creative problem solving that would be well-suited to a person with ADHD. Anything creative or artistic, healthcare, tech, sales, skilled trades, restaurants, etc. If the "reality" you are trying to prepare your child for is becoming an accountant/banker/lawyer/bureaucrat, then you will probably all be disappointed.

Most people with a formal ADHD diagnosis are likely to require some medication in order to make it through the training for a career in healthcare. There is typically a lot of study and rote memorization required. Even a relatively simple job like phlebotomist requires an ability to focus and consistently follow fixed procedures without getting distracted.
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