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Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

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Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#311
post #300

Earlier quoted context omitted.

No, not what the GP said. Simply put, women are overly cautious when evaluating men because they know that they are not very well protected by the law (in as much as the threat of punishment acts as a deterrent, an idea for which the jury is still out) when it comes to rape, so they have to protect themselves by using any little indicator to hint that they are in the presence of a pervert. This is not particularly fa…

I don't disagree with what you're saying, though I think that only picking on social awkwardness goes too far. For the benefit of any guys who read this and feel bad about themselves, here are some other behaviours that frequently correlate with inappropriate sexual behaviour: - playing on a sports team (I'm Canadian, so I like to pick on hockey players, but this happens in other sports as well). - working on oil rig…

being too smooth.

Too smooth? What is the right amount of smooth?

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#312
post #89
post #80

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Um.... So because the author doesn't normally soapbox about this hot-button issue but felt unusually compelled to call this instance out, you're less inclined to take him seriously? Never mind that either side of that is the worst kind of ad hominem.

Exactly. Because that, along with the article itself, suggests that the unusual compulsion is not a strong opposition to sexism. Ad hominem concerns apply to rational arguments. This piece is not cool, rational discourse. It's a highly emotional piece, written to incite emotion. Inquiring about the source and nature of the emotion that drives it is fair.

He probably didn't notice sexism until it became personal. Why is that wrong? Most people become activists when something personally gets in their face, rather than through some abstract idea of "justice".

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#313

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Indeed. This would become the first question I asked a woman when trying to date. If she's childish enough to use something like this, I'd have no problem saying sayonara. There should be some expectation of maturity and general couth in any relationship.

Indeed. If you decide to stop dating someone because of an application on their phone, you are the mature one and they are the child.

Yes, it does. I have standards for the people I choose to involve myself with. In a similar vein, I would likely not even befriend anyone that uses it, or anyone that supports this type of application (either directed towards men or women). A big part of maturity is having personal integrity in all dealings. This means, for me, an automatic rejection of anyone who would use something like this. Similarly, I do not befriend constant gossips or complainers, and call my friends out when they do it. Certain people are a waste of relationship effort.

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#314

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not to mention, female privilege lets them call men "creepers" or "perverts" without question. I've pressed female friends about this and they just answer with "I didnt like the look he gave me" or "we just didnt click." So instead of understanding that most people are not compatible, we're now building a db to slander them based on purely emotional reasoning? If women are using this then it says a lot about the woma…

"Creepy" means "he made me feel threatened and unsafe". It's valuable information for women to share within their social group so that they can avoid uncomfortable situations. Though it is not at all appropriate to share such information on a public online forum.

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Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#315

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not to mention, female privilege lets them call men "creepers" or "perverts" without question. I've pressed female friends about this and they just answer with "I didnt like the look he gave me" or "we just didnt click." So instead of understanding that most people are not compatible, we're now building a db to slander them based on purely emotional reasoning? If women are using this then it says a lot about the woma…

"Creepy" means "he made me feel threatened and unsafe". It's valuable information for women to share within their social group so that they can avoid uncomfortable situations. Though it is not at all appropriate to share such information on a public online forum.

Unattractive guy dared to look at me or ask me out, what a creeper. Onto the shit list he goes.

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#316
post #206

I'm amazed at the kinds of apps which exist and get exposure. This is stuff which might have been fun in high school, but there are actual adults using this. Not to mention the insane double standard. I'd love to see a man make a similar app for rating women this way. I'm sure there would be news reports and tons of angry feminists flooding the airwaves.

Try being a woman on the Internet — anywhere on the Internet, not this one idiot site — and then talk about insane double-standards. When every other online interaction involves at least a few men commenting on your fuckability or how much of a 'bitch' you are, or going digging through all of your previous posts or even tracking down your Facebook account so that they can publicly share your body with all of the othe…

The fact that other double standards exist in other parts of the internet isn't what I was debating. I won't argue with you that there is an inherit double standard among both sexes, but seeing as this thread is about the website in question -- that's the one I was addressing.

Also, in no way should double standards and sexism lead to more double standards and sexism.

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#317

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah, lets blame the males, those horrible, horrible people who oppress women by being in prison, homeless or committing suicide (or, in the past, dying on the battlefields on Europe by the millions). Try to read a little more about how genders really work before you claim that men are the only oppressors: the top of society is mostly men, but so is the bottom. The survival rate of third-class female passengers on th…

I did not say "Men are oppressors" or "Blame men". I said, in a nutshell, "Blame our social structures that tend to favor men." There's a very real difference there in terms of the moral claims being made. And yes, feminism is also concerned about the ways in which this social structure hurts men, very much so. It's just that the consensus is that it hurts women more, so today there are larger and more immediate gain…

You're wrong about the consensus thing, from the perspective of people who use words like 'patriarchy' in a off-hand no-explanation-required fashion.

An appeal to consensus - never mind being logical, consistent or mindful of context - would be an improvement over where these debates with patriarcy-theory indoctrinated feminists always end up, which is 'you're wrong by definition'. That is, sexism can only hurt women because that's what the word has been defined to mean. It's utterly ludicrous and intellectually bankrupt approach to dialogue of course.

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#318

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Query: why are 80% of men homeless. That stat on it's own is not indicative of disadvantage towards men. There needs to be some analysis of the why to determine that. Quey: how does the suicide give women an "uppper hand" this is a personal choice, and doesn't seem to be about gender equality at all. Sure you could say "men are more pressured..." but you could also say "women aren't empowered to make decisions about…

>Query: why are 80% of men homeless. That stat on it's own is not indicative of disadvantage towards men. There needs to be some analysis of the why to determine that. It indicates that men are at a disadvantage. It doesn't matter what causes the disadvantage, it's still a fact. Of course, when men are at a disadvantage the reason is never expected to be gender roles or discrimination. >Quey: how does the suicide giv…

>>Query: why are 80% of men homeless. That stat on it's own is not indicative of disadvantage towards men. There needs to be some analysis of the why to determine that.

>It indicates that men are at a disadvantage. It doesn't matter what causes the disadvantage, it's still a fact. Of course, when men are at a disadvantage the reason is never expected to be gender roles or discrimination.

False. This is not how statistics work. There could be other confounding factors that are relevant. For instance, of the women who would become homeless how many are forced into some sort of prostitution scheme from which they can't escape? How many die early in homelessness because they are at a survival as homeless person disadvantage? You are not providing enough data, just cherry picking context free numbers as if it meant something.

>>Quey: how does the suicide give women an "uppper hand" this is a personal choice

>If you think social issue like suicide can be categorized as "personal choice", you don't know much about depression and suicide. There are factors that increase risk to suicide, like poverty and depression, which are quite prevalent in males.

Maybe. So what advantages to women have. Again, you need to explain a causal relationship of advantage, not just cherry pick numbers as if it were meaningful.

About the dating stuff: your stat makes no sense with regards to genetics. Everyone gets a X chromosome, some get 2 of them. Of course there will be more attributable genetic lineage to women, wheres a guy who only produces daughters will not necessarily be identifiable in a few generations from his sister who passes on the same X chromosome to ~50% of her offspring. Also, why does this genetic number prove evidence for "do nothing"? That is conflating two similar numbers pointlessly. Again, I suggest you learn some simple statistics.

As for the initiation thing: that is not a disadvantage to males. A couple reasons:

First of all, except for people who have 0 social skills initiation is really not hard.

Second, initiation must be invited, putting half the onus in the woman's hands (again, there are cues and signaling for this) - the act of asking or a date or starting a conversation is quite far into the courting process.

Third, simply choosing the best candidate is not - ever been part of a hiring process? Sometimes all the candidates are shitty and you have to choose "no hire", this is a problem.

Fourth do you really think women just sit there and do nothing in dating but wait for a candidate to come along? I doubt that, otherwise why would there be a giant business targeting women with things like "how to make guys notice you", and "improve your dating potential".

Fifth: In the traditional role, women have the following disadvantage: they are the ones with the job of keeping men around far more often than men keeping a woman around. Once the relationship is established, the woman has to keep the man happy. (again - big buisness in magazines with articles like "keep your man happy and around", "how to prevent him from cheating" and the like).

Finally your linked article presupposes the conclusion it reaches, and ignores in its analysis any other factors.

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#319
post #215
post #119

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What about a girl who is acquaintances with a gossip girl who uses the app and searches for guy's they're dating, and lets them know about whatever is mentioned on there?

I don't get why everyone is so paranoid about this. What are people trying to hide?

Among many other good reasons, it's an app whose nature is determined by the same kind of dynamics that govern many restaurant and product reviews.

Most of the time, satisfied customers don't bother to review the product or service because a certain psychological barrier first needs to be overcome (i.e. "writing this review is worth my time because it's SO good/bad"). Middle-of-the-road reviews rarely make it through, and when they do, they are typically short and uninsightful. Reviews that draw the most attention are those at the extremes.

Human beings are generally more prone to extreme dissatisfaction than extreme satisfaction. It's in our nature. When is the last time you thought, "Man, that person drives SO well!" or "My bill is SO low this month!"?

In the case of Lulu, the comments will heavily skew to the negative since "satisfied customers" will likely still be dating the guy (and thus not posting reviews) and dissatisfied ones will have every incentive to write vindictive comments in a last attempt to "get even". And those who are initially angry with the guy but later change their minds are likely to write a review during the angry phase and forget about it later, when their opinion of him has moderated. The end result is that most of the guys on the site will be portrayed in a much more negative light than is actually merited.

In terms of its user base, it's really just catering to the female equivalent of guys who engage in "slut shaming". But it's more socially acceptable because the app targets men instead of women, and men are expected to be more psychologically durable.

Re: Lulu: An App No One Should Accept

#320
post #273

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You're being too harsh. You seem to be talking about Haskell, so saying "not everyone" is a weird way to put it. You really mean a tiny fraction of people use Haskell to be safe in advanced ways. Well, Haskell is ahead of its time. Of course not that many people use it. Even Haskell is not a silver bullet against every kind of security problem. Didn't Snap have a directory traversal bug a while back?

I don't understand what you are trying to convey. It appears like a deliberate red herring to try to distract from what I actually said. I personally use haskell, but you do not need to do so to get a complete guarantee against SQL injection. Nobody said anything about silver bullets or protecting against every security problem. I very clearly said SQL injection is a solved problem, in reply to someone claiming every…

You are being too harsh (again). Whatever problems you deal with, whatever mistakes you make in your professional work, are also solved problems, using some technology that is unacceptable to you (probably for very good reasons).

You could have been informative and made your original point tactfully. Instead, you badmouthed a certain technology without even naming the stuff that was supposedly better. I'm a Haskell evangelist and agree with you 100%, and you came off like a jerk even to me.

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