As someone once said, "You can offer an excuse or you can offer an apology, but you can't offer both." I'm not sure which this is. It sounds to me like both.
You can offer both, but the most likely outcome is that they won't be accepted as such.
I'm a creep. I'm sorry
181–190 of 453 posts
Re: I'm a creep. I'm sorry
#182Caveat, McClure's behavior was bad. But seeing recent public floggings for misbehavior I now wonder if people are feeling a bit hypersensitive/cautious about any workplace conduct that could potentially be perceived as harassment. Case in point. You work at a technology company. You are attracted to another coworker, who is NOT your subordinate. Is there some manner in which it is acceptable to express your interest?…
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Re: I'm a creep. I'm sorry
#183His response reminded me of the famous 'Asoh Defense', when Captain Kohei Asoh accidently put a perfectly good plane into the water on approach to SFO [0]
> Asoh, when asked by the NTSB about the landing, reportedly replied, "As you Americans say, I f__d up." In his 1988 book The Abilene Paradox, author Jerry B. Harvey termed this frank acceptance of blame the "Asoh defense", and the story and term have been taken up by a number of other management theorists.
I believe Dave McClure taking responsibility for his mistakes in such a strong way is a step towards repairing the damage caused by his inappropriate behavior.
[0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Japan_Airlines_Flight_2#The_.2...
Re: I'm a creep. I'm sorry
#184Pure PR, if he is really sorry, he should resign from all positions with "power" over other human beings...
If he were truly sorry he would retreat to a mountain lair to live out the rest of his days as a monastic hermit. Clearly the fact that he still has a keyboard to type on proves his insincerity. /s
Re: I'm a creep. I'm sorry
#185Loses his job. Major strike on his career. National public shaming. I'm gonna click the link and go see what murderous crime he committed.
People lose their job for all sorts of reasons, no crime necessary. If you're going to worry about people losing their jobs, why don't we start by talking about everyone laid off at Etsy, and importantly, the college kids who were informed two weeks before their internship started that no such internship existed any more? As for career and public shame: he's had a wildly successful career and significant public prais…
i.e. 'if they are powerful, nothing done to them can be called injustice' progressive.
Re: I'm a creep. I'm sorry
#186Caveat, McClure's behavior was bad. But seeing recent public floggings for misbehavior I now wonder if people are feeling a bit hypersensitive/cautious about any workplace conduct that could potentially be perceived as harassment. Case in point. You work at a technology company. You are attracted to another coworker, who is NOT your subordinate. Is there some manner in which it is acceptable to express your interest?…
>Or is this just not OK at all? You are asking single 18-30 year old who spend most of their waking hours at work, to not make any advance to the only females they probably see in the week. Good luck with trying to fight nature.
sorry dude, but that is not an acceptable answer. We live in a society - with moral and legal structures of what is acceptable. During my the life of this startup and the previous one I have gotten f'ed over royally by a small amount of individuals where they infuriated me incredibly. "nature" would have made me punch them in the face - but that is incredibly unacceptable behavior in a society or work environment. You have to be rational and understand what is OK and what is not like an adult.
Re: I'm a creep. I'm sorry
#187Earlier quoted context omitted.
This is the wrong answer.
I wasn't asked a question and didn't provide an answer (or even a proposal), but I understand that having a rational discussion on this topic is difficult or impossible for most people, and I'm sorry if I offended you.
> Honest question...
> I wasn't asked a question...
Anyway:
You didn't offend me at all.
I should've been more clear: It doesn't have to do with looks. That's the wrong way to look at this.
And as far as subjective feelings being relevant to whether a crime is committed or not: It's not that unusual. If you threaten to kill me, for example, then my feelings are critical to deciding whether a crime has been committed. Law isn't software. To a certain degree, it's gray by its very nature.
Anyway, I'm not sure how I feel about the criminality of a lot of this behavior, but a lot of it definitely feels destructive and immoral.
Re: I'm a creep. I'm sorry
#188Is it just me, or is committing public seppuku like this really necessary? If what he did was illegal, he should face prosecution. If he's compelled to apologize and admit his guilt, he should reach out to the people he actually wronged. This kind of public self-flagellation ("I'm such a creep. Please forgive me, world.") feels really over the top, phony, and symbolic.
He's in damage control mode, a purely defensive move to dig his crampons in and stop sliding.
He may mean what he says but only time will tell. Currently is all talk.
Re: I'm a creep. I'm sorry
#189Earlier quoted context omitted.
I think asking coworkers out is a huge no-no. If the only people in your orbit you feel you can connect with that way are at work, that's a sign your personal life needs some development. However, let's say you have a robust personal life, and you just have this absolutely amazing co-worker, who totally is not your subordinate, and ideally you don't even work directly with, and you want to ask them out... again.. I d…
'Asking out co-workers is a huge no-no' - to me this feels almost anti-humanist to the point where business is truly more important than our own lives, our being, our existence and our own free will. There is a massive difference between asking out co-workers and sexual harassment.
As a humanist, I disagree. This is my reasoning: Unless the feelings are mutual, asking someone out at work can have negative consequences for the person you're asking, even if your intentions were good. You can't control their feelings, but you can control your actions. Also, believe it or not, your romantic options far outstrip your employment options. Asking people out at work just seems easier but it's quite complicated.
Re: I'm a creep. I'm sorry
#190Is it just me, or is committing public seppuku like this really necessary? If what he did was illegal, he should face prosecution. If he's compelled to apologize and admit his guilt, he should reach out to the people he actually wronged. This kind of public self-flagellation ("I'm such a creep. Please forgive me, world.") feels really over the top, phony, and symbolic.
>Is it just me, or is committing public seppuku like this really necessary?
I suppose he felt this 'public seppuku' was necessary because a) he was called out by name in the NY Times article and b) he wanted to put it on record that the woman he hit on wasn't rejected from his company for rejecting him. I suspect (b) is the true motive, and without a certain level of self-flagellation it wouldn't be socially acceptable to state that fact.