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Ask HN: I was let go from a company again, I'm really depressed

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Re: Ask HN: I was let go from a company again, I'm really depressed

#11
If I was a sociopath or narcissist who wanted to hire people to bully into working sixty-hour weeks, I'd hire you based on how you're talking alone. This might be your problem if you insist on a work-life balance, or have more backbone and resolve than my first impression suggests.

I'd insist on finding a place that has good mentoring. That'd be my primary job-search criteria in your shoes.

Re: Ask HN: I was let go from a company again, I'm really depressed

#12

Do you do the work?

Most of the time I get the work done, yes. But there are other times where the client doesn't have realistic goals, like the last project I've been to, they just say something like this:

"We need to ship this on Monday May 11th, so we need you to aggressively plug away on this. You still need to do X and Y. I'm going to put something together with info on how to prioritize the work."

And this after 2 weeks of hiring me, then they say nothing and fire me, without a word, while I'm getting the work done.

Re: Ask HN: I was let go from a company again, I'm really depressed

#13
post #6

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What details would you like to know?

What client goals are you not meeting?

I don't know, they tend to be vague, but performance comes to mind. They sent me this email today which is really vague:

"Given the urgency of the project, and the communication problems, I don't think this is a good first Company project for you. I removed you from the project. So I can make sure you're put in a better position, what's the ideal project for you?"

Re: Ask HN: I was let go from a company again, I'm really depressed

#14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What details would you like to know?

- Do you get along with your coworkers? - Where are your shortcomings? - Can you actually program? - Are you misunderstanding requirements?

- There are times I get along with my coworkers, which happens to be most of the time, there are times I don't.

- I don't know, I feel performance tends to be one of my problems, especially when working under pressure and being stressed / burned.

I hate working under pressure, and when clients have unrealistic expectations. I don't mind deadlines if they are realistic.

- Yes, but I tend to get stuck a lot, I try to solve problems and most of the time I can solve them, but it takes time, and what frustrates me the most is when clients don't understand that writing code takes time, and they insist, several times per day... with emails: "How it's going?" and so on, then they might get rude, etc.

This is what frustrates me the most, unfortunately many managers and clients don't understand that writing code is hard work and when I'm taking more than a week on a task they fire me.

- No, if I misunderstand something I speak immediately.

Re: Ask HN: I was let go from a company again, I'm really depressed

#15
post #7

Have you spoken with a psychiatrist regarding ways to address your concentration problems? Without medication, getting my brain to do what I want it to is like bushing a bolder up a hill. With the proper medication, I gain a lot of control over my concentration.

No, I never spoke with a psychiatrist.

Re: Ask HN: I was let go from a company again, I'm really depressed

#17
Learn to work as a "workhorse": find your tempo and don't try to get faster, just commit regularly to your boss/customer; and do not compare to others until the end of the year.

You will be more appreciated than a "race horse" in a few years from now and you will find your working place easily in any large corporation sooner than you think.

Re: Ask HN: I was let go from a company again, I'm really depressed

#18
Without (a) having worked alongside you or (b) seen the work you produce, it's impossible for anyone here to give accurate advice.

For (a) I would advise asking previous employers (both the manager who made the decision to let you go and former work colleges) for honest feedback. It's difficult to give honest negative feedback, so be clear that you are asking because you are genuinely interested in self-improvement.

For (b), just thinking aloud here, do you have a github repository where you can show us your work? There may be fundamental issues with style, logic etc that could be addressed through training.

Re: Ask HN: I was let go from a company again, I'm really depressed

#19
Accept the fact that you are not great at what you do and promise yourself you'll work hard to be one ! Can you do that? I feel the same sometimes. I started masters degree after more than 5 years in programming and after couple of months I was just depressed. I just could not do anything. It was so much heavy maths. As I write this, I'm looking at another assignment to submit. And it's scary. but I accept the fact that I'm not good at it, but I'm going to be one if I don't quit and keep working hard. People feel depressed because they think they have to be good at it. You just need to say "Yes I'm not good, may be I'm worst but I'm going to change that." Rather than thinking it over and over again and wasting your time, start working towards it. And remember, it takes time. Don't compare yourself to anyone.
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