Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband • Hacker News Board

Re: Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband

#71

Post by ygmelnikova » Thu, Jun 04, 2015, 7:12 AM UTC

nness wrote: post #61

ygmelnikova wrote: post #55

"Goldberg collapsed at a private beach-front villa near the Four Seasons Resort in Punta Mita, near Puerto Vallarta, Mexico" Today, 21,000 children died from causes that are preventable. I don't see any posts on HN about that. http://www.unicef.org/mdg/childmortality.html "Then said he also to him that bade him, When thou make a dinner or a supper, call not thy friends, nor thy brethren, neither thy kinsmen, nor thy…

I believe it to be distasteful to use the death of someone whom this community has some connection to push a separate agenda. You can call out our priorities as being too short-sighted if you want, but this is a poor way to do it.

"This community" and "our priorities"?

That's exactly my point.

Re: Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband

#72

Post by guelo » Thu, Jun 04, 2015, 7:14 AM UTC

For those like me that are wondering what is going on, apparently some Silicon Valley executive died recently.

Re: Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband

#73

Post by wumbernang » Thu, Jun 04, 2015, 7:17 AM UTC

guelo wrote: post #72

For those like me that are wondering what is going on, apparently some Silicon Valley executive died recently.

Thanks. That's the tl;dr I needed.

Coming from the UK, this made no sense whatsoever to me.

Re: Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband

#74

Post by ygmelnikova » Thu, Jun 04, 2015, 7:18 AM UTC

DanBC wrote: post #70

ygmelnikova wrote: post #55

"Goldberg collapsed at a private beach-front villa near the Four Seasons Resort in Punta Mita, near Puerto Vallarta, Mexico" Today, 21,000 children died from causes that are preventable. I don't see any posts on HN about that. http://www.unicef.org/mdg/childmortality.html "Then said he also to him that bade him, When thou make a dinner or a supper, call not thy friends, nor thy brethren, neither thy kinsmen, nor thy…

> Today, 21,000 children died from causes that are preventable. I don't see any posts on HN about that. Guinae after ebola: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=9544278 Why murder rates matter to humanitarians: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=9519472 Rohingya screen light portraits (Internet huts used by refugees) https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=9194870 Socio economic impact Of Ebola: https://news.ycombinat…

Guinae after ebola: 1 point

Why murder rates matter to humanitarians: 1 point

Rohingya screen light portraits (Internet huts used by refugees): 1 point

Etc.

Thanks for the validation.

Re: Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband

#75

Post by sambeau » Thu, Jun 04, 2015, 7:19 AM UTC

peteretep wrote: post #14

redmaverick wrote: post #9

Joe Biden's speech in 2012 touches upon similar themes that Sheryl writes about. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwZ6UfXm410&t=5m10s "I have to tell you. I used to resent people. They'd come up to me and say, 'Joe, I know how you feel. I know, right? I knew they meant well. I knew they were genuine. But you knew they didn't have any damn idea." "For the first time in my life, I understood how someone could consciousl…

> Because they’d been to the top of the mountain, and they > just knew in their heart they’d never get there again, > that it was never going to get — never going to be that > way ever again And Sheryl says: > I know I will never feel pure joy again. Those who have > said, “You will find a new normal, but it will never be > as good” comfort me more because they know and speak the > truth Is this attitude ... normal?…

I can confirm this. It has been 15 years since my son died.

On a day-to-day basis there is a new normality in my life and the emotion surrounding his loss is locked tightly in a box. There is plenty of happiness and plenty of new happiness in my life.

However, at all of the happiest moments in my life the box is opened and I am reminded that we are missing the one thing that would make this moment complete.

This is why old people cry at weddings.

Re: Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband

#76

Post by camillomiller » Thu, Jun 04, 2015, 7:19 AM UTC

AndrewKemendo wrote: post #63

littletimmy wrote: post #53

Earlier quoted context omitted.

To first approximation, there are almost no people who would have a "grand legacy" that could extend centuries. How many do you know from 1850? Eventually, no one will remember you, and that is true even if you are the most successful person on earth. The urge to have a legacy is a manifestation of the fear of death, and is primarily an exercise of ego. It does not have to overtake one's life.

It's not about being remembered, it's about your life having positive impact beyond those you can personally see.

Yeah, but the question nobody's posing is: why should it? That's a question I personally can't answer. I don't see any higher meaning in "leaving a legacy". You'll be dead anyway. Why shouldn't we focus on living a better, more relaxed and less stressful life while we're here to recognize that?

Re: Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband

#77

Post by sambeau » Thu, Jun 04, 2015, 7:20 AM UTC

wumbernang wrote: post #73

guelo wrote: post #72

For those like me that are wondering what is going on, apparently some Silicon Valley executive died recently.

Thanks. That's the tl;dr I needed. Coming from the UK, this made no sense whatsoever to me.

His death made the front page of the BBC website.

Re: Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband

#78

Post by nitrogen » Thu, Jun 04, 2015, 7:21 AM UTC

littletimmy wrote: post #53

AndrewKemendo wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I can't explain it now that I have a child and family and have lost people very close to me. As I posted to someone below you, I am married and have three kids. I have also lost a lot of my friends - I am an Iraq war veteran and was in the Air Force from 2003 until last Feb. All of that has led me to my conclusion because I see what is left after these people have gone away - and largely it's...nothing. Once their fr…

To first approximation, there are almost no people who would have a "grand legacy" that could extend centuries. How many do you know from 1850? Eventually, no one will remember you, and that is true even if you are the most successful person on earth. The urge to have a legacy is a manifestation of the fear of death, and is primarily an exercise of ego. It does not have to overtake one's life.

One can want a legacy without fearing death, and one needn't die to have a legacy.

Re: Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband

#79

Post by infinitone » Thu, Jun 04, 2015, 7:23 AM UTC

ygmelnikova wrote: post #55

"Goldberg collapsed at a private beach-front villa near the Four Seasons Resort in Punta Mita, near Puerto Vallarta, Mexico" Today, 21,000 children died from causes that are preventable. I don't see any posts on HN about that. http://www.unicef.org/mdg/childmortality.html "Then said he also to him that bade him, When thou make a dinner or a supper, call not thy friends, nor thy brethren, neither thy kinsmen, nor thy…

I also find it hypocritical that usually religion is bashed/downvoted to hell, yet its not the case when a rich person is doing it.

I never heard of Goldberg till now... and I think thats the case for many people on HN.

Re: Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband

#80

Post by wumbernang » Thu, Jun 04, 2015, 7:24 AM UTC

sambeau wrote: post #77

wumbernang wrote: post #73

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Thanks. That's the tl;dr I needed. Coming from the UK, this made no sense whatsoever to me.

His death made the front page of the BBC website.

AFAIK it didn't on bbc.co.uk. Perhaps bbc.com but I don't look at that.

It's all about FIFA bribes and rollercoaster accidents.