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Re: undefined

#11
> I'm doing fine, I'm not broke in terms of money. I would say from the materialistic side, I have good life.

"We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief requirements of life, when all that we need to make us happy is something to be enthusiastic about."

- Albert Einsten

Re: undefined

#12

"Seriously, who can work 80hours/week" There's your problem. I feel bushed after a 40 hour week (I typically work 30-35 hours a week), I cannot imagine working 6 days for 13 hours, that's just incomprehensible to me. Where do people squeeze time for family and fun? You're burned out, and with good reason, don't feel sorry about that.

His employer is an idiot for thinking that this actually achieves anything. I used to do 50 hour work weeks, now I do 40. Those mere 10 hours have made a massive difference in the amount of usable work that I get done.

Either work out something with your employer, or better yet, find a job somewhere else and "educate" your current coworkers about work hours.

More time = less done. In a creative job 40 hours is already pushing the boundaries.

Re: undefined

#13
post #11

> I'm doing fine, I'm not broke in terms of money. I would say from the materialistic side, I have good life. "We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief requirements of life, when all that we need to make us happy is something to be enthusiastic about." - Albert Einsten

Yeah I know this one and it's really true. Thanks for the reminder though...

Re: undefined

#14
post #10

Lone parent of 2 kids (5 & 2) juggling a full time job and freelance on the side just to make enough to cover the bills and mortgage (which I'm trying to buy my ex out of). Yeah, I know tired. Don't have any advice, but you're not alone, and it's certainly not restricted to the SF location.

Good luck to you!!

Re: undefined

#15
Since you posted about an hour ago, right now you will get mostly responses from HN'ers in Europe, Australia, etc... who will mostly sympathize with you.

Can't wait for the west coast to wake up, where you will get told it's your fault.

Re: undefined

#16
Long-term stress can deplete your body from some minerals and vitamins. Go to a doctor and check your levels of blood pressure, thyroid function, vitamin b and d, testosterone.

Try to work only 40h/week, and go talk to a cognitive behavior therapist, you might discover something about yourself you didn't know.

Re: undefined

#17
post #10

Lone parent of 2 kids (5 & 2) juggling a full time job and freelance on the side just to make enough to cover the bills and mortgage (which I'm trying to buy my ex out of). Yeah, I know tired. Don't have any advice, but you're not alone, and it's certainly not restricted to the SF location.

Oh, as a parent of two kids myself (4 years & 6 months), I tell you: CONGRATS! I can't imagine having to deal with a job and the two kids alone. Good luck to you!

Re: undefined

#18
So, the question is, is this what you want to be doing?

And if it's not, what do you want to be doing? Where do you want to be next year? What do you value in life - location, friendship, money, comfort, what?

Re: undefined

#19
Yes. I feel tired too but I don't live where you live or have your exact lifestyle.

I think I'm tired of fitting myself into a system of work that emerged and wasn't designed to be fulfilling emotionally.

I think most people need to tell lies of some sort to convince others, and even themselves, that everything is good and that we're fine with it, we're doing great.

Lying is really tiering. My plan is to try and be a bit brave, try being honest and follow the ideas that appeal to me, ask the questions that I want to ask etc...

Ethics, principals, humour.

Re: undefined

#20
Just a side note, it's wrong to believe that just because you don't have any money problem, your problems are not real or serious ("first world problem"). "Money doesn't buy happiness" might sound like an overused stereotype but it's very true. Especially when you don't have time to spend your money.

"You basically just can't come in, bro up, stack up and get the f* out."

Actually yes, you can. Just go easy on the $6 coffees, fancy restaurants (with pricey wine and lyft) and with a software engineer salary you should be able to save a few thousands a month. The problem is that you'll want to live the life that your friends/coworkers live, and they can be big spenders. So you restrain yourself, and after that you move to a place where housing is cheaper, and that's a nice downpayment for a house.

You just need to figure out what you want to do. Stay in Silicon Valley? Move to some cheaper/quieter place? For your job, get a salaried position or go independant? Create your company?

You're free to live the life you want, where you want, especially if you're a programmer (as I assume) because there's pretty much no unemployment in most countries. People here will often recommend you to go for the most ambitious path, create a startup, etc, but that's not the best path for everyone.

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