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Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

washingtonpost.com

71–80 of 105 posts

Re: Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

#71
post #58

Earlier quoted context omitted.

No they are not delusional. I know of many cases (from my sister who worked in child protective services) where spiteful(or even sometimes well-meaning) neighbors report people to CPS for the dumbest things. CPS is required to investigate every one of them, and it is quite a hassle. I'd say most of the time if you are actually doing nothing wrong the chance of them actually taking your kids is pretty low, but the cha…

[deleted]

The OP never said "The government is going to take my children for playing in the front yard," so I'm at a loss where you got that quote. Maybe you inferred that's what he meant when he said "I'm afraid a neighbor will report me and the government will come take my kids away." That is a very real concern. When a CPS agent comes calling, any righteous indignation on your part can easily result in your children being taken into custody. If you don't bend over and take it with a smile, they'll make it 1000x worse.

EDIT: I really wish I could down-vote things.

Re: Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

#72
There are two counter points that are not covered. Kids getting hurt in car accidents doesn't distinguish between them being in the car or being hit by a car. All of the car accidents I have heard where a child was hurt have been when the kid was crossing.

Secondly, its not a question of if the world is safer. The issue is with how litigious the world is, if the cops hadn't called CPS and something was wrong they would have gotten in trouble, if the CPS hadn't followed standard operating procedure their jobs would have been on the line.

In my opinion, as a parent, the people to blame are the over protective parents that call for "Think of the children" laws/rule just because of statistically insignificant tragedies.

Re: Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

#73
post #58

Earlier quoted context omitted.

[deleted]

The OP never said "The government is going to take my children for playing in the front yard," so I'm at a loss where you got that quote. Maybe you inferred that's what he meant when he said "I'm afraid a neighbor will report me and the government will come take my kids away." That is a very real concern. When a CPS agent comes calling, any righteous indignation on your part can easily result in your children being t…

So you agree with keeping your child indoors because of the risk of a neighbor filing a false complaint? That is sad.

Re: Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

#74
post #53

Earlier quoted context omitted.

[deleted]

Hardly delusional and seriously un-fun when you are on the receiving end. When my son was 6-ish and my daughter around 1 years old, we got a visit from DFS(like CPS). This was 8 years ago and the amount of rage it brings up in me is immense. Being immediately threatened with your child being taken away for refusing to do ANYTHING that they ask is ridiculous. I'm sure it is there to be able to have some power over the…

Thanks for opening my eyes. I didn't want kids before, and I knew if I had them I'd home-school them, not spank them, teach them negotiation skills and so on, but knowing anyone can call CPS, anonymously and without consequences, and put me through that traumatizing and exasperating ordeal, makes me think it's not a matter of desire but prudence.

I can totally understand your rage. I can't imagine another kind of reaction. It is very irresponsible and callous of CPS to act in that way. But then again what did I expect from the guvmint...

Thanks for relating your story.

Re: Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

#75
post #46

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don't know whether I agree with your general sentiment or not. But maybe we should consider whether your response to this article is itself an illustration of the very phenomenon that leads us to perceive the world as more dangerous as it is. The usual account of why we live in such irrational fear is that nobody wants to hear about things going well, and everyone being safe and happy on the news. Anyone who watche…

The Police chided the parents for letting the children walk alone and about how unsafe the world is. The Police have fallen prey to the "the world is dangerous" narrative. Did they just admit they can't keep/make it safe?

The police are naturally going to have a skewed view of society (modulo racial and class issues) because they spend their days dealing in bad situations. If your job is dealing with "bad people" doing "bad things" you're probably going see the world a little differently than folks who maybe never have to deal with the same situations.

Re: Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

#76
post #5

How odd. America is much safer than it used to be, but people are more afraid. My father walked to and from school every day in Montreal when he was young, for a good half hour each way I believe. He'd go in a group with kids from the neighborhood, there were no adults. I walked to school every morning in Canada starting from age six, alone. I didn't live far from school, but if I had lived further I still would have…

I imagine parents react to not the world as it is, but as it was when they were growing up. The current world is really heavily shaped by a generation of people that: 1) had a very comfortable upbringing (i.e. are not used to loss); 2) spent most of their formative years under the threat of nuclear holocaust, skyrocketing crime, etc. My friends and I are entering our parenting years (my wife and I are 30), and we are already noticing how much more laid back we are than our parents growing up.

Not to mention this place is in the DC Metro, which is uniquely uptight and unpleasant among American localities.

Re: Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

#77
post #5

How odd. America is much safer than it used to be, but people are more afraid. My father walked to and from school every day in Montreal when he was young, for a good half hour each way I believe. He'd go in a group with kids from the neighborhood, there were no adults. I walked to school every morning in Canada starting from age six, alone. I didn't live far from school, but if I had lived further I still would have…

I don't know whether I agree with your general sentiment or not. But maybe we should consider whether your response to this article is itself an illustration of the very phenomenon that leads us to perceive the world as more dangerous as it is. The usual account of why we live in such irrational fear is that nobody wants to hear about things going well, and everyone being safe and happy on the news. Anyone who watche…

You don't have to be afraid of bad things happening to your kids from "bad people" to decide they shouldn't walk by themselves. You might decide that it isn't worth the hassle of "good people" like the cops or child protective services threatening to take away your kids.

So even if you think your children are reasonably safe from people doing bad things to them; the risk of the government causing you all kinds of strife makes you reconsider letting them have an unsupervised walk.

Re: Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

#78
post #22

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's always worth considering alternative hypotheses, but I don't think this one holds true. I've lived in dangerous places. North Americans take very few safety precautions. In general: * People aren't aware of their surroundings. Often have headphones. * People wave phones around in the air, hold them loosely, or leave them dangling out of back pockets. * People use public ATMs, in insecure locations, and don't pay…

I understood most of what you said, but I'm not sure about > * They carry no cash to hand over in the event of a mugging Can you elaborate on this point? I'd be surprised if thieves thought, "Jeez, nothing to steal from this one, I'd better at least stab them or I won't have done anything wrong..."

If you give the mugger $30 and he'll simply take it and run away. If you have nothing to offer the mugger he might get aggravated and start demanding you give him something else of value like your phone/jewelry/shoes etc. and quickly thing can start getting ugly.

Re: Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

#79
post #46

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The Police chided the parents for letting the children walk alone and about how unsafe the world is. The Police have fallen prey to the "the world is dangerous" narrative. Did they just admit they can't keep/make it safe?

But it is safer now, that's the paradox.

To be fair, Silver Spring, MD, probably isn't safer than it was. It was a pretty sleepy place 20-30 years ago, and in recent years has attracted a lot of urbanization as well as a significant amount of low-income immigration.

Re: Parents investigated for neglect after letting kids walk home alone

#80

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I see what your saying with the whole phone waving and public atm's. And I'm not trying to sound macho when I say this but I much prefer to carry a more physical type of deterrent that when employed will have a much more reliable effect than a monetary incentive. I would think it's more of a "don't feed the bears" thing.

Doesn't this prove the point? A weapon only escalates a situation. If Americans were being robbed all the time, they would quickly realise that carrying one is a very very bad idea. However, because the US is generally a safe place, Americans can carry a weapon without much risk, because they will almost never have to use it.

There's some truth to your second statement, but your first statement doesn't follow from it. If it was commonplace for people to get involved in altercations where they had to defend themselves with a weapon, it'd be both a better idea to start carrying a weapon if you weren't already, and it'd also discourage people from committing petty crimes like muggings. It might be worth it to a criminal to potentially lose their life over $1000, but not for $20.

You could make the argument that my statements logically extend to saying an armed populace increases larger more violent crimes while reducing the prevalence of petty crimes, and I agree that might make sense in a short-term, but criminals don't grow exponentially just because, crime is a symptom of separate social factors.

Fundamentally, there's no downside to carrying a weapon. If you don't need it, then you don't need it. If you do truly need to defend yourself with violence, then there isn't really much substitute and worse case you die wishing you'd had a weapon.

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